Vent, decline rate, kinda long

lawjjg522

So..  I'm kinda depressed.. we have a 36% decline rate.  Not a ton of our guest list is from OOT,  but probably about 20 people..   A lot of our family-- who lives an hour or so away-- isn't coming because their  daughter can't bring her 2 kids.(another 10)  They have inlaws that live 10 minutes away.  At this point, we have 12 days till wedding..  Chair cover count, etc is due in the next couple days.   still need to hear from 15 people who  we can't get a hold of. They are from the area-- do we count them as no's?  What if they show up?  Oh, Also, we had estimated 270, with a room min. of 280..  Uhm yeah, we are at 226. We have to pay $25 per person under 280..  THats like 1300 right now.. They already upgraded bar for half price..(Don't know how i finagled that one..) theres nothing else we can upgrade for the difference or anything..what do i do?

jujubee455

eww that sucks... sorry to hear about it! I would count like half of the fifteen is coming maybe... at least you got upgraded bar! There is NO POINT in stressing/worrying about it! You probably have way bigger things to think about! So just focus on the things you need to get done, and focus on how great your day will be with the people that are there! Maybe invite some extra friends?? Have your friends invite friends? If you are just worried about wasting money that is what I would do.... don't make it a free for all, but at least then its not wasted. HTH!!! And congrats on it being like under two weeks!

LovesPink927

I feel you.  It's such a bummer that people can't make it (for good and bad reasons) and that you can't get ahold of some people (we're in the same boat right now!) I'm still unsure of what to do with the people that I haven't heard from and whether I should count them or not.  I've heard both ways of, "If they don't respond, they don't get a seat" or "Still count them..." It sucks to still count them because when/if they don't show up you're out the money.  If you don't count them and they do show up, they are SOL. I've gotten to the point where if it's past the rsvp due date and I've tried numerous times to get ahold of them, I'm not counting them. I hope it all works out for you!!  (sorry, this post was really long!  Can you tell I really feel for you?!? haha)

ejay

Call or email the people that you still haven't heard from... let them know that your final counts are due in the next few days and you need to know if you can count them as yes or nos. If you have some friends or coworkers that you didn't invite, you may be able to let them know they can come, although it could come off as slightly tacky. Is there anyone on your list that couldn't have a guest before that now you have room where they could bring a date? (like a cousin that was coming with his parents etc...) The only other option I have for you is invite some knotties that have their reception at the same venue or have met you at a GTG (if you've done one)... Hey if your going to have to pay for the seats you might as well fill them up.

lawjjg522

 Inviting knotties  was my next thought.. 

moeoscar

I would call/e-mail those 15 people and tell them that you need to know by tomorrow, if you don't hear from them you will not count them and they can't come. Try to get FI, your mom and his mom to help with this too.How much are you paying per person? If it's more than $25 I wouldn't start inviting random people b/c then you are greatly increasing you costs. Yes it sucks to pay for people that aren't there, but is having random people at your wedding really going to make you feel better? You say it will cost about $1300 right now, but how much would it be if you actually filled all of those extra seats with random people? If you were paying $50/person that would be about $2600. It's doubling your costs! Plus think of all the other money you are going to save... fewer chair covers, tables, table linens, centerpieces, menu cards, ceremony programs...I would just stick with the guests you've got and not start inviting random folks, it doesn't make any sense from a financial stand point. Also, the fewer people that you have at the wedding, the fewer people you need to spend time with talking!

festivegal2008

that really sux.  :(as far as dinner goes, if you have to pay anyway can you tell younger members of the family they can bring a friend to come eat?  can you get a smaller room or no? i'm sure it'll all work out.

Mrs.Joshi

If your paying for 280 anyway don't worry about those that didn't RSVP. Include them and if they show up - great! Put an email out to your friends or family that if they want to invite friends after dinner ( 50 less chair covers, table clothes, etc. can bring the price up more) at least you'll get the money out of the bar.