theme of wedding & shower to match?

zulamay

My FMIL wants to use the same theme as my wedding (travel/maps) for the shower.  I'm not wild about this idea.  Am I wrong?  Should I just let her do it? The hosts of my other two showers (yes, I have three in three cities) just want to use the colors, which I thought was more traditional. The biggest thing that bugs me about this is that I've put so much work into coming up with this theme, making it unique, etc. and she's like spilling the beans before the wedding even happens.

lisa89760

If you have an issue and the theme is supposed to be a surprise then I guess you could talk to her.  But since she is throwing the shower for you, it's hard to be too picky.

zulamay

It's not so much of a surprise as it's just my ideas.  She has a habit of copying what I'm doing, e.g. I mention I might get FI a suitcase for Christmas and she buys the suitcase. She's a sweet lady but this one habit of hers drives me nuts.  

courtney1188

Honestly, I cannt imagine complaining about the decor or theme at my shower, especially if I'm getting three of them! That is a lot, and I know of many brides where the shower has had the same theme as the wedding. I don't think it will take away from the wedding details, I think you're just being a bit over-sensitive since this is an ongoing issue you've had with her. The suitcase thing I'd get upset over, but I wouldn't say anything negative about a party she is planning for you.

klreese0213

i could see how this would be frustrating, but maybe if you sit down and have a little chat you could use the theme but go sorta in a different route. Obviously the shower wouldn't be as theme oriented as your wedding so i wouldn't stress too much.
I'd be selective on what ideas you have for your wedding so she isn't too tempted to ("accidentally") steal your ideas.

courtney1188

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_michigan-detroit_theme-of-wedding-shower-match?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:88Discussion:2a3f7b71-4495-4fd3-8384-7bc2a817dd9cPost:f20ae4ef-66ce-4eb1-9b7d-ae17f80ef841">Re: theme of wedding & shower to match?</a>:
[QUOTE]i could see how this would be frustrating, but maybe if you sit down and have a little chat you could use the theme but go sorta in a different route. Obviously the shower wouldn't be as theme oriented as your wedding so i wouldn't stress too much. <strong>I'd be selective on what ideas you have for your wedding so she isn't too tempted to ("accidentally") steal your ideas.</strong>
Posted by klreese0213[/QUOTE]

I agree with this.

zulamay

I think you all are right and I should just let it slide.  I've been trying to limit the details...actually FI was the one who told her that the theme is travel.  Basically anything I tell her end ups all over FI's hometown, so I've learned not to say much of anything unless it's public - it's like posting it on Facebook.

And as far as the showers...yeah, I think it's nuts I have three.  It's just what people wanted to do...they kept coming to me.  I have to fly for two of them, so it's not exactly cost effective.