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Weekend Wedding Recap - not mine, of course! :)

So...FI's brother got married on Saturday.  It was really cool to see how happy they were and to see a wedding within our family a month before our own, for comparison's/planning's sake.  It was a lovely day, the bride was beautiful and the groom was handsome, and they seemed to have a wonderful time.  I thought I'd write a little post focusing on the negatives, though,  to maybe help other knotties prepare for problems they might not otherwise have considered.

1)  Remember to quadruple-check with your vendors.  When I got to the church with the groom's party, the flowers hadn't arrived yet.  Florist couldn't be reached for 45 minutes.  When they were reached, they were like "oh, we thought the wedding was at 4.  Nope.  2:30.  Oh, we'll be right there."  All the guests were already seated when the flowers arrived, and the florists were walking up and down the aisle placing the altar flowers.    Plus, they were running so late because of the delay that bride and groom just told them not to put up the pew bows, so they didn't even get to use the flowers they had so carefully picked out.   They had spoken to the florist, like, 6 times.  But I think a call that morning might have eliminated this problem.

2)  Triple-check that your officiant knows how to pronounce your new last name.  Their reverend pronounced them Mr. and Mrs. Nottherightname.  Megasuck.

3) Your guests need to know what's going on.  After the wedding, the wedding party filed out through the back.  Then the guests filed out into the lobby and stood around waiting for the bride and groom to come back from signing the license.  After 10 minutes, we're getting antsy.  After 30, people are seriously craning their necks and giving each other meaningful looks.  Finally someone says "hey, they're in there taking pictures!"  They went straight from the signing back into the church and were taking pictures with the party.  They never came out to be congratulated.  But the guests figured they still had a part to play, so they were waiting awkwardly.

4)  I know it can't always be helped, but a 2 1/2 hour gap sucks.  If you're doing it, I would recommend providing a little list of things they could do/local bars or restaurants so that various local family members don't end up playing tour guide to the out-of-towners.

5) Being separated from your significant other also sucks.  I know that it can't be  helped during the ceremony (since FI was a groomsman).  But afterwards, I stood in the lobby while FI took pics in the church for an hour.  And then I third-wheeled it home with his parents and walked the dog while they drove around in the limo with the wedding party and partied for 45 minutes.  And then sat in the reception venue lobby for half an hour while they finished preparing it, while the bridal party hung out and partied in a private room upstairs.  And then sat at my assigned table in the corner during cocktails and dinner with FI's other brother's girlfriend (who I don't really know) and 8 other couples and singles of the "we went to high school with the bride and groom/did her hair today/used to babysit together" sort of variety.  FI visited me as much as he could, and we got to dance together later on, but as a person who has mild social anxiety anyway and barely knows FI's family, the bulk of the day sorta sucked for me.  Consider inviting SOs to sit with the bridal party during dinner.

5)  Dollar dances = meh.  I'm firmly opposed to them on etiquette grounds.  Having actually seen it done now, I have to admit that in the moment it didn't feel as grossly mercenary as it looks on paper.  But still....

6) If you have late-night snacks (in this case, pizza delivered), consider having the dj announce it or something.  We were sitting there and I saw a dude walk past with a piece of pizza.  "Hey!" said I.  "That dude has a piece of pizza!"  FI, ears suddenly pricked like an Irish Setter who's sighted a flock of ducks, starts whipping his head around looking for the source of the magical pizza.  He eventually found it on a table off in the corner.  But I don't know if most people even realized it was there.

All that said, it was a lovely event and the bride and groom looked fantastic and had a great time.  Hope this might help someone in their planning process.  :)
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Re: Weekend Wedding Recap - not mine, of course! :)

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    Mrs0toBeMrs0toBe member
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    edited December 2011
    Excellent reminders for all of us!

    I love your pizza quote. 
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    acaponi87acaponi87 member
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    edited December 2011
    Very helpful! Thanks :)
    June 16, 2012
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    edited December 2011
    I have been debating about the SO of the wedding party. I think you just helped me make up my mind. Thank you.
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    sheshedukeshesheduke member
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    edited December 2011
    Great advice I am so on it with 18 days to go SERIOUSLY!
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    larzhopelarzhope member
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    edited December 2011
    I was really against having significant others up at the head table b/c dude, that's an extra 7 people and that's a huge head table.

    We decided to do a sweetheart table instead and I'm really happy we did, now our bridal party friends can sit with their own friends instead of with people they may not know that well. and their dates will be happy too :)
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    Meegles4Meegles4 member
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    edited December 2011
    I'm totally for having SO's at the head table because I've definitely been the odd date out at a wedding where I didn't know anyone.

    This means our captain's table could have upwards of 30 people (7 attendants on each, plus dates, plus us). It'll be a party :-)
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    edited December 2011
    As someone who just got married, you totally nailed this.  All excellent advice.  Especially the vendor thing (my organist forgot to show until we called him), the wedding party date thing (we did the sweetheart table, and I know the wives of the groomsmen were grateful), and the late night snack thing (we had tons of extras since we didn't have it announced).
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    edited December 2011
    We are definitely doing a sweetheart table because of what I had to go through when my FI's sister got married. I was just in a wedding last weekend where they did the sweetheart table and all us BM&GM got to sit with our own families and friends and it was awesome. 
    These pointers definitely are now in the back of my mind and I will be sure not to forget them, thank you!
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