Am I Being Unreasonable?

peonypinkbride

Aside from my MOH, who is my sister, all my bridesmaids live where we went to college {about 3 hours away}. One weekend I went to visit them for another of our friends weddings and we all went to about 3 stores to look at bridesmaid dresses for my wedding. I couldn't find anything I like there, so I emailed them and asked them to come up here for a weekend to go bridesmaid dress shopping and for them to let me know what weekend is good for them.
One of the bridesmaids emailed me back and said it's silly for them to all come up here and travel for 3 hours and stay the weekend since they are all from where we already went and that I should just go and look here myself, pick out the dress I want them to wear and let them know and they will be happy to order it.
I'm a little upset that they aren't into dress shopping with me. They did come with me up here but no one seemed to like the same dress, so I thought going to some other area may be better.

kristinanddan

Eh, I think 3 hours is a long way to travel to look for dresses. I say, either give them a color and a fabric and let them go to David's Bridal, or just go with whoever wants to go with you and pick out a few dresses and let them vote.
Remember: it's your wedding, and no one will be as into it as you.

summerbride11

I agree w/ pp. I think if the concensus is that you should just pick the dress, that's what you should do.  In order for your bridesmaids to travel 3 hours they are sacrificing time and money (gas, etc.). The fact that they already attempted to shop for a dress, it's probably just easier for you to decide...and it works to your benifit as well...GL!

babyoski1

why don't you look for shops somewhere in between you and your bridesmaids, that way you and them dont have a travel 3 hours. the distance probably seems unfair to them but if you and them traveled the same distance to one another I feel it would be fair. Goodluck!!!!!!!

ssage

I had four BMs...two from here (my MOHs) and two from Boston.  I will tell you the Boston girls came down one weekend to look at dresses...I didn't ask, they wanted to.  They ended up ordering the dresses from the same store and my friend was in boston and dropped them off to them so they could do alterations there.  FYI, the bridal store offered to shipt he girls their dresses for the cost of fed ex (about $15-20).  Once they all found the dress, i did say they could look for it up there.

Also, one of those BMs, I was in her wedding the year before mine, and I traveled to Boston to look for a dress up there and ended up ordering it down here.

I think that what you are asking is not unreasonable and honestly, I do not think you should have to "settle" for David's Bridal if you don't like them (i wore DB in that boston wedding and although the dress was pretty, i had a horrible experience with my store and thought the dress was cheap).  I think there is no reason why you can't find a dress you like around here (have your sister/MOH go with you for opinions) and then tell them what it is and they can take care of getting it.

Just my 2 cents.

TerriandJoe

That's tough. I get that they don't want to drive 3 hours, but you could make a weekend out of it. But by that I mean - come visit me for  aweekend and we will have fun seeing some hudson valley sites and restaurants. And we might take a few hours and look at BM dresses. NOT suggest that they come to you for wedding-planning weekend.

But, with that being said, you might want to check out what designers are out there, and see what you like, and let them go from there. I looked at a bunch of designers because the color was important to me. I had three BMS - my 2 sisters and SIL. I went to town shop (they have a ton) and told my sisters I was ok with Jim Helm, Dessy and Watters. They looked over the dresses liked Watters choices best. So it was Watters Cherry. And I let the girls pick whatever dress they wanted. I just wanted them to have different dresses. That was the only thing. I didn't want them to be in the same dress.

So you might want to suggest a fun, friends weekend to see if they will take the trip.

Or, look around here at different designers (find out what is carried at stores near your BM's) and go from there.

Also, remember, that just because a certain store carries a certain designer does NOT mean they carry that designers entire line in their store. They can order the dress sure, but may not have all the dresses in the store to be looked at and tried on.

GL! HTH!

lala2282

I would go shopping with your sister and pick a dress/style out that you like and make a decision.  I too have out of town girls and it was hard to get everyone together.  Since ordering from a local dress shop would probably inconvenience your bridesmaids, I suggest going with a shop called Pearl's Place, that sells dresses at wholesale prices, and shipped the dress directly to the girls homes for $12 a box.  No sales tax either.  If all 3 of your girls are in the same town, you'd only have to ship one box.  I had a lot of luck with them.  It took less than 3 months to get the dresses and all sizes, colors were exactly as ordered.  It was very cost effective for us, and at the end of the day, its the dress you want them to wear...it's your day:)