Massachusetts-Boston

Oh boy.... coworker drama (sort of wedding related)

Let me start by saying that I've worked in a very... um... unsettled group of people for several years.  There are a lot of different personalities and there's always a lot of drama.  I took a new job early this year, but still see my old group on a regular basis.  I worked closely with them all for a long time, so I invited them all to the wedding.  Everyone there was so excited for me to get engaged and they all heard a lot about my wedding plans when I was with them every day, so I felt like I didn't want to exclude any of them from the day.  Fast forward to the last week or so- there's a woman in the group that has been there for many years.  She can be abrasive and have a bit of an attitude, but for the most part, she's not bad.  She actually applied for a job where I'm located now.  There's another person in the group who is another strong personality, but she's also a complainer and would throw you under the bus if she had any reason to.  She and I always got along pretty well, but I know to watch myself.  My old group now has a new manager- our old manager is now in the facility I work in (I still work for her).  Second coworker went to new manager and complained about first coworker.  First coworker is now suspended indefinitely for reasons that were not presented to her, and she's really pi$$ed about it.  I can't blame her, everything was done behind her back and the new manager and the HR rep wouldn't even lay out the reason for the suspension, no warnings, nothing.  They are trying to expedite her movement to the facility I work in.  I feel really badly for her, and another coworker (who recently moved to the facility I'm in) is good friends with coworker 1 and is fuming mad as well.The problem now is that both of these people are invited to my wedding.  I haven't mailed invitations yet, but both of these women were invited to my bridal shower, so now I need to follow through with a wedding invitation.  The girl that works with me currently told me today that she doesn't know if she'll be able to come to my wedding because she can't even stand to look at coworker 2.  I know that this just happened, but still... at the very least, it's going to be awkward.  I don't even know what to think right now, but I don't need anyone causing a scene at my wedding.
*Kelly* MARRIED to the love of my life October 17, 2009!

Re: Oh boy.... coworker drama (sort of wedding related)

  • edited December 2011
    Why can't adults act like adults?Invite them both as you planned. Let them decide their comfort level. They may put aside their differences and attend your wedding (because it is YOUR wedding and not about them) or they both might skip out- which would be a pity that they couldn't get over their bickering. I had two cases of this at my wedding:Scenario #1: MIL wanted to invite two friends but those two friends didn't get along. She ended up inviting the friend she was closer to, and later regretted not inviting the other when Uninvited Friend gave us a wedding gift despite not being invited.Scenario #2: A close family friend (my "second" dad) didn't want to come to my wedding because he wasn't comfortable seeing his ex with a new boyfriend. I invited all of them anyway. They managed to stay out of each other's way and all had a great time.
  • edited December 2011
    These are adult women. I'd either trust they can act their ages or trust that one (or both) will stay home if unable to be in the other's presence without going bush league at your wedding reception. I would say that this falls into the category of "beyond your control."
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    Wedding Date: January 16th, 2010

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    Cycle #5: BFP on June 14, 2011 -- Due Date: February 23, 2012 -- Born: February 26, 2012
  • edited December 2011
    You would think that they could be trusted to act like adults, but I don't have a lot of faith in that since they can't act like adults at work.  I'm just going to let the situation resolve itself- it's not my fault that their problems escalated to what they did, and I'm not going to create more drama by 'uninviting' anyone.  I'm pretty sure that at a 200 person wedding, these people can avoid interacting with each other.I'm a little nervous about my shower next weekend- it's going to be small and it's at my friend's house.  I hope everyone can act like a grown up. 
    *Kelly* MARRIED to the love of my life October 17, 2009!
  • jamidandedbjamidandedb member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Put #2 at my table, I'll take care of her ;-)
    BabyFruit Ticker
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