So, my flower girl just told me she's not wearing the dress I ordered.

LoveAdopted

Ok. Let's go back two weeks to a day full of shopping, eating, and lots of girl time. I took my niece shopping for her dress, and she had so much fun. Got a little tired, but she loved just about every dress she tried on.

So I ordered one. She is here tonight, so I showed her the picture of her in the dress I ordered, and asked her if she liked it. Her response? No, and shook her head. Then I asked, well will you wear it for me? Again, no. She has also told me she won't let a hairdresser do her hair (fine, but it has me worrying about the day in general)

I thought she would be the easiest to work with! I think once the day is here and she is handed a dress to change into, it won't be a problem, but UGH! Now I have something to stress over that had never once crossed into my mind!

Blueyed228

Im sorry but I do not negotiate with children.  I would (in the nicest way possible, lol, which Im sure I could never be nice about) let her know that this is her dress, and if she does not want to wear it then she can sit with mommy and daddy at the church and be a regular guest.

Maybe you can talk to her mom about it.  She can probably handle it better.

jquirke9881

My niece went back and forth on telling me she liked the dress and then a week later she didn't like it, and then the next month she liked it again.  She was 4.  Her mother told me the dress would be fine and not to change it.  She won't even remember the dress by the time the wedding comes around.  Is she your only flower girl?  I was lucky that I had two older nieces as flower girls also, so when the big day came the little one only wanted to do what the older one did and was cooperative.  Maybe get her excited about dressing up like you or the BM's?

EKobrenski

I agree with jquirke about making her feel excited, but I've found kids tend to do things like that when they think they have an option.  So i wouldn't ask her, I would just say, this is your dress, look how pretty!  And if she says she doesnt want to wear it, tell her that that is the only dress the flowergirl can wear. 

jrock0412

how old is she? my five year old daughter is my flower girl and is SO picky with stuff like dresses. i have found, though, that if i bribe her it works really well

"if you wear this for me, i will buy you some pretty sparkly jewelry that we can pick together to go with it..."

"if you wear this for me, i have a surprise toy for you to get when it's over!" 

she will be so excited for the surprise (not knowing what it is, could be something small and not so exciting) that she will be great! lol

LoveAdopted

Thanks for the replies! I asked her again in the morning if she liked any of the dresses she tried on, and she said no. So I said "Well, I already bought you your dress. Will you wear it, for me?" And she told me she would. What I'm thinking is that she only remembers the dresses we tried on that we itchy or uncomfortable, in which case, I can't blame her for saying she didn't like them.

I know she will be fine on the day of, probably won't even be thinking about it until we slip it over her head. Getting her to let a hairdresser do her hair might be another issue.. but I can deal with that She just wants her mom to do her hair.

MomJen

Just be prepared. My daughter was the fg for my brother in law.  She was really great and happy and pleasant and agreeable until it was time for her to walk down the aisle.  Temper tantrum to top all temper tantrums because she didn't want to wear the dress.  I was the MOH but I just picked her up and asked her if she could calm down.  NOPE - not a chance of that happening.  Another aunt (not in the BP) sat with her during the ceremony in the bridal room and after about 10 minutes she calmed down and wanted to join the festivities. Her aunt kept her busy until she knew the ceremony was over and then the joined up with us.  Actually have some pretty cute wedding pics with her in the dress and life went on.  Her Aunt told her that story on her wedding day - her response... maybe that is why I knew I didn't want a flower girl!