Elopement celebration - help!

iheartmarshall

The FI and I are planning to elope and get married in the mountains next May.  Our immediate families are on board with this and we plan to have a casual bbq a month or so after the wedding to celebrate with our friends and family.   We're not formal people and don't like the idea of the traditional wedding so this is MUCH more our style!   However, since it'll just be the two of us at the actual ceremony, do you all have any suggestions on how I can word the after-wedding bbq invite so that people don't feel left out and/or blindsided that we got married without them present? 

Pipesqueak

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_elopment-celebration-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:0078d088-819a-45c9-b2d6-1f4bc81e294fPost:2b11c51b-2e56-428b-a354-d1160cb423f9">Re: Elopement celebration - help!</a>:
[QUOTE]I wouldn't do it on the invitations for the bbq. I'd send out a wedding announcement the day of/after you get married just saying that Name and Name were married in a private ceremony on X date. <strong>Then send out separate invitations to a bbq, but don't have the bbq be wedding related at all. No gifts, no first dance, no cake cutting, etc. Just a party.
</strong>Posted by lovethebeach16[/QUOTE]

YUP! My thoughts exactly. Just have a big party.

iheartmarshall

Those were my thoughts exactly!  We're forgoing the traditional wedding to avoid the first dance, bouquet toss, cake cutting, etc... but I still want it to tie into us, maybe with photos from our ceremony and small elements like that.  I haven't decided.

Thanks for the advice though!  I hadn't thought of sending out announcements right after so I will definitely keep that in mind!

Maggie0829

I think having photos from your ceremony at your later celebration is a great idea.  This way your guests will be able to see moments from your big day.  You could also do a slide show and/or show a video of your ceremony during dinner.

As for making the party tie into the two of you...decorate it according to your couple style.  All the details from table cloths to food to centerpieces to specialty drinks are all reflections of you and your FI.

msuprincess04

It's perfectly acceptable to have a "wedding celebration" and not a wedding reception after eloping.

ginadog

When I send out wedding announcements, I will want to include a lovely photo from my photographer on the announcement, so the whole day after thing doesn't seem logical since it takes a few weeks to get photos back (just something to think of if you wanted to do something similar).  A announcement with a photo seems nicer than one without!

Loopyseven

A wedding announcement is really a simple, formal communication that the marriage took place.  It is not intended to be newsy, or include photos or details of the day.  It should be sent within a week of wedding (really, the day of, or within a day or two if possible).    

Including a photo just seems to me to be rubbing the recipients face in the fact that they were not invited to the event.  Include a photo in your next holiday greeting card once you get them back from your photographer.