Hello ladies, I'm hoping you can help me figure out what to do on this one. I'm getting married on June 25 2011, and one of my bridesmaids told me a few weeks ago that she isn't sure she'll be able to be in the WP.
I knew when I asked her that she had financial problems, and I was prepared to spring for the dress for her. My parents and I are paying for hotel rooms for the WP, food, and transportation for the weekend of the wedding; she lives close to three other girls in the WP, so she'd have a ride to the wedding area. Another bridesmaid is throwing me a shower and bachelorette party, but I'm not requiring that she attend either. When she told me she maybe couldn't make it, she cited money issues. I reminded her that I would buy the dress, and she said she'd think about it.
She doesn't answer phone calls or emails, so the only reliable way to communicate with her is text, which she usually answers. We've texted back and forth since then, and I haven't mentioned the wedding at all. A couple of days ago, we were texting and I sent "Have you thought any more about whether you'll be able to make it to the wedding?" Silence. She hasn't contacted me since.
I understand if she really can't make it; I just need to know soon so we can book hotel rooms, make up programs, etc. (Also, if she decides to come, we'll need to order the dress.) I don't care about even sides so that's not an issue.
Is there any way I can have a conversation with her about this without her freezing me out? Am I being too pushy? I don't want to ruin our friendship over this. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you!