Foot in mouth- how to smooth it over?

KentuckyKate

My cousin Matthew is getting married on Saturday.  He lives in the same city as me.  I just sent another one of our cousins who lives in Seattle a FB wall post asking if she was coming down this weekend for Matthew's wedding.  She answered,

No, I didn't know it was this weekend so way too late to try to get tickets, would be nice to see everyone though

Oops for just assuming she was invited, but in my defense...  I didn't know if she'd be able to come, but I thought she would have at least gotten an invitation, especially since we are all very close.  She is very family oriented and comes to literally everything she is ever invited to, including flying in for our younger cousins (Matthews siblings) high school graduations.  We also take family vacations with her.

I am not blaming him or mad or anything-  I am currently in guest list HELL myself.  My question is, what is a tactful way to respond to my Seattle cousin on FB?  I was thinking of putting something like, "OK, see you in July!" (my wedding) but also didn't want to completely ignore the current situation.

georgia_bride09

You can't assume she wasn't invited. Maybe it was just poor planning on her part.

I'd go with you response- "OK, see you in July!"

JessAndTrav

I would just say something like, "Oh, I'm sorry. I'm looking forward to seeing you in July, and I'll tell everyone you said hello."

While that could be rubbing it in her face, I wouldn't really know what else to say.

SarahPLiz

I think you should just ignore what she said about not being invited. But that's just me. It wasn't your decision to make, so you can't really apologize..

SwedishChick2011

Well, she said "I didn't know it was this weekend" not "I wasn't invited."  Is it possible she was invited and forgot about it or decided not to come?  Maybe she really wasn't invited and didn't want you to feel bad for asking, but maybe she was invited. 

I'd respond with something like, "That's a bummer, but at least I'll get to see you in July!"

danieliza1127

Ditto the others.  It's really not your place to apologize or address her not being invited.  Just say something like "oh okay, well I'll see you in July then!" and leave it at that.

betrothed123

My niece had a baby shower this weekend.  I was invited, and even RSVPed, but when I woke up Sunday morning I had completely forgotten it was the day of her shower.  When MIL reminded me, I said "Oh, that's THIS weekend?!"  So yeah, I wouldn't assume she wasn't invited.  It's possible it just slipped her mind.

I'd go with what GA or Jess said.

Stackeye210

It's not your fault she wasn't invited........I don't think you need to do any sort of damage control.  Just tell her you look foward to the next time you get to see her, or if you feel like you must address it then say something like, "it won't be the same without you there, can't wait to see you in July"

KentuckyKate

I am 100% sure she wasn't invited, if that makes a difference.  My mom has since talked with her sister (Seattle cousin's mom).

georgia_bride09

Still makes no difference. It's not your place to mention it.

betrothed123

I agree with GA.