Wedding Etiquette Forum

How often do you see the inlaws?

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Re: How often do you see the inlaws?

  • FI and i live 30 minutes from my parents house, about 45 minutes from his parents. With a bridge toll in between, which cuts down on unexpected visits (a big reason we moved across the Bay) In a normal month, we'll see my parents twice and his parents twice, generally in alternating weekends. Of course, it doesn't always work out that way. Lately, I've been seeing my mom a ton because of wedding stuff, while back at Christmas we saw his family a ton. Also, my parents and sister will drive over here, while his won't. I think his mom has seen our apartment once in the 19 months we've lived here. And she always complains that she doesn't see us enough, but then is out or asleep when we come over to see them. I have a good relationship with her, but this really annoys me.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_see-inlaws?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:093d6581-ce10-479c-a445-9885110342c4Post:ea48b561-9ce9-4ff4-a074-a32c12680bf7">Re: How often do you see the inlaws?</a>:
    [QUOTE]We live less than a mile from my ILs and 6 miles from my parents.  I takes less than 2 minutes to get to my ILs' by car and 15 to get to my parents'. H and I see our respective parents more than we see each other's parents, for sure.  I see my parents at least once a week, and he sees his at least once a week.  I can easily go a month without seeing the ILs, and he usually only sees my parents once or twice a month.
    Posted by DramaGeek[/QUOTE]

    This was going to be my answer. I see them once a week and he sees his once a week, but I put off seeing his as much as I can. I can't actually think the last time I've seen them, maybe 6-8 weeks ago? It's better for me that way.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_see-inlaws?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:093d6581-ce10-479c-a445-9885110342c4Post:f9e84d90-47d0-4d4b-a6ee-f34be4f43a3b">Re: How often do you see the inlaws?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: How often do you see the inlaws? : This was going to be my answer. I see them once a week and he sees his once a week, but I put off seeing his as much as I can. I can't actually think the last time I've seen them, maybe 6-8 weeks ago? It's better for me that way.
    Posted by whitsy[/QUOTE]

    <div>Whitsy, I think we might be living the same life.</div>
  • I think that seeing your inlaws whenever you darned well please is reasonable, whether that's once a day or once a year.

    I love my parents and future in laws. If either of them lived in walking distance I'd probably see them almost daily. As it is, my parents are an hour away and I go to their place about once a month, but have been seeing my mom about once a week lately.

    My inlaws live in a different country for half the year. We flew my FMIL back to take part in some new engagement fun but otherwise we see them about twice/month. They're an hour away when they're here, but they come to see us more often than we go to see them.
  • We live an hour and a half away from both sets of parents. We really only see them once every couple months. I do wish we could see them more, but it's hard to make the trip with our work schedules.

    If we lived in town, I'd probably see them 1-2 times per week. And as others pointed out, he can go see his parents on his own sometimes if you don't want to attend EVERYthing.
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  • We basically live with my fiance's parents (they have a full basement apartment that we rent) and see them a few times a week.  We have dinner with them almost every Friday night and go upstairs to chat other nights as well.  If we didn't live with them, we'd still be there on Friday nights and see them at synagogue on Saturdays. 
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  • I think it depends on your relationship with your MIL. I don't have a very good relationship with my FMIL and would rather not see her, but to keep the peace, I try to visit when I am invited and at holidays, anymore and I get annoyed greatly by her. She is very overbearing and selfish and it is usually her way or no way. I have talked to my FH and told him how I feel about her and he understands.
    But, I have a great friend who is with her IL's all the time and they have a great relationship, so much so that sometimes i think she forgets her family. So, I guess it all depends on the people and your relationship with one another.
    Good Luck!
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