Wedding gift for FI

louisvillebride21

I originally bought a wedding band and then later decided that I didn't like it. I found another one and bought that with the intention of returing the first one. Well, I put it off too long and when I went today, they told me I could only exchange it. Well, I really didn't want or need any jewelry. So I decided that I would get FI a watch as a wedding gift. I got him a fairly nice watch (I think...Citizen is a good brand, isn't it?). He really loves watches and I thought it would be nice.

We had never really discussed getting each other wedding gifts, but I don't think we had planned on it. Now I'm wondering if I should tell him that I got him something so he doesn't feel guilty on the wedding day because he didn't get me something. The thing is, there's really nothing I want or need (or I would have gotten it for myself).

So, should I tell him so he doesn't feel guilty, or just go ahead and surprise him with the wedding gift?

Brie2010

We discussed it.  Our discussion went something like this:

FI: So, uh, do I have to give you a wedding gift?
Me:  No.
FI: But what if I don't get you one, and you get me one, and then I feel like a jerk?
Me: True.
FI:  So let's just decide to get each other gifts, so we won't worry about that, but set a limit of $X to avoid that.
Me: Okay.

janedoe1113a

Aww..I'm sure he's going to love the watch. 

I would probably mention it.  I know my FI would feel bad if I got him something and he didn't get me anything.  I mentioned the other night that I needed to start looking for a card to give him on the wedding day and he said he was glad I said something because he didn't even think about getting a card for me.

Stackeye210

Definitely surprise him.

EDIT:  Mr Stack and I are random gift givers for no reason throughout the year though so it wouldn't be out of character to give one a gift, but not vice versa. 

Of course you know your FI better then we do and how he may feel about it.

ohwhynot

I would surprise him with it and then never let him forget it on every anniversary.
;-)

TBH, it never occurred to me to get my fi a wedding present until I started reading about it on various wedding boards.   So if your fi doesn't get you anything (besides, you know, himself, your ring, the whole wedding, the honeymoon, etc.), he shouldn't feel bad.  I don't think it's expected at all. 

sarabellam

I would wait and give him the watch for his birthday, Christmas, Ground Hog Day, some other gift-giving event. But I'm cheap like that.

PsyDet 2155

I think I would just surprise him with the watch!  If he starts getting sad about not getting you anything, you can always tell him that "he" is your wedding present (I know how cheesy this sounds/is).  Or you can just tell him the situation with returning the ring and how you knew he always wanted a nice watch.

danieliza1127

I would probably bring it up casually, like "are we getting each other wedding gifts?" and then just see what he says.  If he says no or gives some reason why he doesn't want to exchange gifts, then just save the watch for a Christmas present or something.

My H and I never discussed it and I got boudoir pics done and gave them to him on our wedding night, and he didn't get me anything.  I don't know if he felt bad about it or not but we probably should have at least talked about it beforehand.

mwhitson14

Well I would probably tell him. But that's because FI got me an awesome Christmas gift and I had NO idea he was going to do that so I felt REALLY awful when I didn't get him much at all

louisvillebride21

Lol, responses are split. Before we got engaged, I used to give him random gifts all the time. He never did it, and never seemed to feel bad. In his defense, he did really kick asss expected gifts. I haven't gotten him a single unexpected gift since we got engaged since we're trying to save money. So I could just make this a really awesome 'unexpected' gift for the wedding. I seriously doubt he would think to get me anything, he just doesn't think that way.

louisvillebride21

Actually, Whit, I think you just helped me out. He went wayyyy over our Christmas limit and I felt like a total ass because I stayed within it. So if he starts feeling bad, I'll tell him it's 'payback' from Christmas.