Wedding Etiquette Forum

Invite Wording

I think I've posted this before, but it's come up again and I still am unsure. Although I already think I know what the general consensus will be, I still want to ask.

My parents are paying for the majority of the wedding. My FH's parents are paying for the "traditional" groom's parents things (rehearsal dinner, his attire, etc).

We (being my FH & I) want our invites to be worded like this:
"My mom & dad
His mom & dad
ask you to join us in honoring our children...."

My mom hates this wording, she's made that extremely clear. She doesn't want his parents included on the invitation at all. Now, if we were having a traditional wedding, okay, I'd understand more. But we're not. It has parts that are traditional, but they're small parts (although I imagine some of the things we are doing are "huge faux pas" in wedding etiquette...that's not the point of this post.)

I really really really do not like the idea of not including them at all on the invitation. My FH & I have discussed this several times over, and we are trying to put the emphasis on US, not just me. (I know people will be ooh-ing and aah-ing over my dress and everything, but this is not just about me!! I'm not marrying myself!!!)

I guess the biggest conflict I'm having - and it's even with myself - is that I know no one will remember the invitations. At least, none of the guests will. I will, as I plan on creating a shadow box of things from our wedding, like the invitation. My mom will probably keep one, but I know it will just end up in a box. His mom will probably keep one, and who knows, maybe it will end up in a scrapbook. 

Help, please.

Re: Invite Wording

  • My mom and dad 

    invite you to

    the wedding of their daughter

    you 

    to 

    your fiance

    son of his mom and dad

    at blah blah time and blah blah place.

    If your parents are paying, I think it's fair for them to want some indication of that on the invites.  
  • We just did "Together with their families...", but then, we're contributing along with my parents and everyone is very relaxed about that sort of thing. 
  • Like I said, we're not exactly having a traditional wedding. My parents may be paying for it, but we are getting married in his home church, in the state he's grown up in. I'll have to talk to my mom & FH again about invite wording. I think the reason it's frustrated me so much is because I feel like she's trying to take over so many aspects of the wedding. She doesn't think we should have the food we want, because she doesn't like the idea. She doesn't think we should have cupcakes. Or if we do, we shouldn't have them in papers. Or at least put them in another, fancier, paper. Her latest idea is to provide all of the guests with transportation to the reception. Now - I can see how that would be good. But, how would they get to the ceremony? And then home/back to their hotels from the reception? Plus, how many vans/buses would we need to rent to transport 150 guests? Just doesn't seem logical to me.

    Thanks though, for all your feedback. And sorry for the rant there....
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