Inviting coworkers...

JodiMarie76

It's months from now but I'm already worried about offending coworkers who aren't invited. I am a teacher so I think that makes it a little harder to decide who to invite when I work closely with many staff on different committees, etc. So hard to make "the cut" though...
Absolutely inviting my team that I work with every day, but after that it gets harder to decide - it's like being in high school all over again! And what if they have a shower for me? Then do I need to invite everyone?! There are so many great people at our school, but a few that I absolutely do not want to be part of my day - they do enough to stress me out during the week.
Probably more of vent...but any advice would help

Brie2010

Work showers (and church showers) are the exception to the "everyone invited to the shower must be invited to the wedding" rule.

I would do one of two things:

1.  All co-workers or none.
2.  Invite only those you see outside of work socially.  If you'd call them up for a drink, invite them, if not, don't.

We're inviting FI's co-workers because his office is very small and they socialize regularly, but none of mine because my office is large and I don't see anyone outside work.

anna.oskar

My rule was, If I normally wouldn't invite them over to my home for dinner, I didn't invite them.  just invite the teachers/specialists that you are close to.

Work showers are the exception to the "only wedding guests should attend pre-wedding parties" rule.

MyNameIsNot

Work showers are an exception to the invite rule.

As far as who to invite, we did only those co-workers that we socialize with outside of work.  It seemed to work well and not create any drama.

gkb0910

I agree with the PPs to just invite those who you would socialize with outside of work.

One thing to add, though, is to not talk about your wedding at work since everyone will not be invited.

YaPuppy

I would say invite who you're comfortable inviting and just leave it at that, just wouldn't talk about it at work too much if there are people you have to deal with that won't be invited.  Otherwise though, I wouldn't worry about offending anyone.  People should understand if you're friends/not friends how that will go.  As for work showers, those are generally an exception to that sort of thing.  As long as you thank the people involved and whatnot, you should be good even if not everyone is invited to the actual wedding

JodiMarie76

Thank you fellow knotties! Just what I needed to hear, luckily we have had many weddings over the last 5 years that not everyone has been invited to so I think that makes it easier to only invite those I am close to. Wow...not a good teacher sentence at all

sucrets4

Ditto everyone.

And even if you don't socialize with the people on your team outside of work, I understand how close you are with them every day, so I would probably invite them.  I'm a music teacher, so it's a little different, but I see how the grade level teachers are.

COnoviaSarah

I'm a teacher with the same problem!  I haven't figured out what to do, yet. I'm on a team of 2 (small school) and will obviously invite her and my former student teacher who now is on our staff.  There's several others that I socialize with outside of school, too; we're all younger and our staff is like a big group of friends!  But, I'm not close with them all, so it's blurry about where to draw the line.  I'm no help, but wanted to say that I understand your stress!  

hoshiku

How small is small (in terms of inviting everyone at work)?  My place of work recently doubled, from 9 people to 20 people.  I was prepared to invite the 9 people, especially since we work 60-90 hours a week together but I'm uncertain about all the new people.  By the time I get married I will have worked with them for half a year but at the moment I don't know most of them at all!