Wedding Etiquette Forum

Bad invitation etiquette

Hi to all, I don't usually post here (but I read all your helpful advice!) but we received an invitation yesterday that I just had to share. My finace's cousin (who lives in another part of the country) is having her wedding the same day as ours. We received an invitation to her wedding yesterday and I was shocked to read it. At the bottom of the invite, it says "Please make sure to include the required $25.00 per person cover charge with your RSVP".
Has anyone ever heard of charging a cover charge for their wedding??? We, of course, will be declining, as we have our own wedding to attend:) But I can't imagine EVER attending a wedding where I had to pay a cover charge. What do you all think?
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Re: Bad invitation etiquette

  • OMG!  No, never seen that before.  Most of the weddings I've been to have been pretty elaborate.  Did you guys invite this cousin to your wedding?
  • that is beyond ridiculous
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  • Thats gutsy
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  • That's just cray cray. And did this individual intentionally plan their wedding on the same day as yours?
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  • I've never, ever heard of that. Although, it sould work well for keeping the guest count low lol.
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  • What do I think? MUD.
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  • I've never heard of that! Who charges a cover for a wedding? Is she getting married at a dance club? That's insane...
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  • What the fvck?!?  I really hope this is a joke. Also, how did they come up with $25? Why not make it $100?
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  • WOW!!!! That's a new low. 

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_bad-invitation-etiquette?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0c1973e9-0daa-44d6-9b08-9b23dd98c2e7Post:bd11ea8e-1590-4048-9994-b1738d2ef953">Re: Bad invitation etiquette</a>:
    [QUOTE]What the fvck?!?  I really hope this is a joke. Also, how did they come up with $25? Why not make it $100?
    Posted by achiduck[/QUOTE]

    <div>Perhaps it takes care of the whole "pay for your plate" nonsense??</div>
  • That's so bad that I actually laughed!
  • We have had our wedding day set for almost 2 years, and she contacted my FMIL to find out when our wedding was, then set hers for the same day...all of my fiance's family lives close to where she does so she was positive they would all come to hers...I think she made a mistake with the cover charge, tho...the worst part is that they are having her reception in a hall that her mother and aunt run, and they are also handling the catering! I think she is just trying to make money from her wedding...I wish I could say it was a joke..but she just might be surprised at how few of the 500 guests she has invited actually attend.
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  • And yes, I am definitely sending her an invite for our wedding...minus the cover charge, of course:)
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  • It's probably an easier decision for most of your family now about which wedding to attend! A cover charge is ridiculous.
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  • That is crazy!
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  • Um....really?!?!?!
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  • Sounds like it comes with a frat party kegger theme. 
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_bad-invitation-etiquette?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:0c1973e9-0daa-44d6-9b08-9b23dd98c2e7Post:fe09d26c-9422-457f-ada0-7bcb5a4be6fb">Re: Bad invitation etiquette</a>:
    [QUOTE]Sounds like it comes with a frat party kegger theme. 
    Posted by graysquirrel[/QUOTE]
    When I went to keggers, they were only 5 dollars not 25! :)
  • you had your wedding date set for 2 years and she called your FI to check the date and set hers on the same day!!! sorry but i've never heard of such selfishness. nutso.
  • i know this was a traditional thing to do about 30 years ago. I actually have some family friends who had their reception at a dance hall where all the guests were asked to pay a cover. However, this is 2011 and from the above listed comments highly offensive.
  • I want to thank you all for allowing me to share and vent a little...my fiance talked with his parents tonight and I guess most of his family is disgusted. We may have a few more to come here, but it's a long way to travel..but his mom said that most of the family she talked to won't be attending her wedding either so I think that makes my honey feel a little better about the whole thing:)

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  • Ballsy.  Stupid.....but ballsy. 
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  • Wow just wow...
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  • I was just curious to see if they had Asian relatives... I'm living in Japan right now, planning a wedding for back in Canada and I've looked into some traditions around here.  I guess in Korea, China, Japan, all around here really, it's traditional and expected for the guests to split the cost of the wedding and reception.  One of my Japanese friends had 3 weddings to go to last summer and payed about $300 for a wedding (the cost of the ceremony, dinner, and dance after, **AND their own favor).  The bride and groom end up really only paying for their outfits.  I know it's taboo in the West, but if they're coming from a different culture they might not have thought about people's reactions. 
  • Nope, they're not Asian..they are French Canadian. 
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  • I would RSVP yes and send them Monopoly money with a little note that says "I'm assuming this incredibly RUDE request is fake, so I figured I'd 'play along' and send you some fake money.  If you really expect me to pay for your wedding, then you can take this money and shove it up your asss"
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