MOH Hair and makeup

erbear81085

Hi my MOH has decided that the people I hired to do hair and makeup was too expensive, so she wants to bring in her sister in law to do just hers bc she won't charge as much. Getting hair and makeup was an option not required At first I was fine with it but now I don't think it would be fair to everyone else bc I'm not letting them bring in their own artists. Then I thought maybe she could get ready at home then come after but she is my MOH so shouldn't she be there with me in the morning helping? Am I just being a Bridezilla or do I just need to put my foot down? Thanks!

mlg78

If you're requiring the girls to have their make up done then you need to pay for it. Otherwise allow the girls other ways to get their make up done.

erbear81085

It's not a requirement. It's an option. I just want to know if its rude to let her use someone else to do her hair and make up and tell everyone else IF they want it done they have to use who I hired.

erbear81085

Or do I let her get it done at home and come later before we leave for the venue. But then being my MOH I feel like she needs to be with me from the beginning but I don't know if that's her responsibility or not

Viczaesar

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_moh-hair-and-makeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0fa963ca-3070-447e-bf01-e7931a48ff93Post:ff708602-0eb4-4f07-9974-3be4da43504b">Re:MOH Hair and makeup</a>:
[QUOTE]It's not a requirement. It's an option. I just want to know if its rude to let her use someone else to do her hair and make up and tell everyone else IF they want it done they have to use who I hired.
Posted by erbear81085[/QUOTE]
Why would you think it's okay to tell anyone they have to use your stylist?  If they're paying for it they get to choose who they use.  You have no say unless you're footing the bill, and even then they can decline.

erbear81085

Because I'm hiring a group to come do the hair and makeup. I've never been in a wedding that DIDN'T hire a hair and makeup team to come do the hair and makeup. It's always optional, but you get in done through them or do it yourself

mlg78

But your group isn't in your MOH's budget. Let her do what she wants.

kmmssg

The bridezilla part comes when you say it isn't optional but if they ARE getting it done professionally, they have to use who YOU have chosen.  You need to let htis go and let her bring in whomever she wants.  You might also want to find out if the other girls think the prices your team is charging are too high for them too.

It would be really rude to tell her she uses your team or she gets ready by herself.

Viczaesar

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_moh-hair-and-makeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0fa963ca-3070-447e-bf01-e7931a48ff93Post:40471046-e9e2-410b-8712-a6825cb7f8f4">Re:MOH Hair and makeup</a>:
[QUOTE]Because I'm hiring a group to come do the hair and makeup. I've never been in a wedding that DIDN'T hire a hair and makeup team to come do the hair and makeup. It's always optional, but you get in done through them or do it yourself
Posted by erbear81085[/QUOTE]
Just because you've seen something done a certain way doesn't mean that that way is correct.  You don't get to control who does your ladies' hair and make up.  You also don't need to hire a hair and make up team for them, you can just arrange for your own hair and make up and let them do what they want, or ask if they want to use your people.

nextrightthing

It isn't her responsibility to be with you all day, first of all.  And yes, you are sounding borderline bridezilla. Can you find a hair and makeup "team" that is cheaper?  Chances are, if your MOH is thinking it is too expensive, it is too expensive for the other women too.  Alternatively, can MOH's SIL do anyone else?   

Honestly?  I'd figure out a way to pay for MOH's hair and makeup.  Whether you are requiring it or not.

SJM7538

OP - can you clarify for me if you are getting ready at a salon or at your house?

To me it sounds like you hired a hair and makeup team to come to your house (or hotel or wherever) the morning of the wedding. Your MOH decided its too expensive so she wants to bring someone else to your house to do hair and makeup, which is fine, but you are worried that if your other girls hire their own person and bring them to your house as well? Am I right?

I don't see anything wrong with allowing each girl to bring in their own person, but it could be a huge cluster **** with four have four or five different stylists there the day of. So no... I don't think you are bridezilla for telling the girls they can't bring in their own stylist. Just make it a point to tell them using your stylist is optional (which is sounds like you have already done) and they are more then welcome to use someone else and you can just meet up once everyone is ready.

dtbluv

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_moh-hair-and-makeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0fa963ca-3070-447e-bf01-e7931a48ff93Post:40471046-e9e2-410b-8712-a6825cb7f8f4">Re:MOH Hair and makeup</a>:
[QUOTE]Because I'm hiring a group to come do the hair and makeup. I've never been in a wedding that DIDN'T hire a hair and makeup team to come do the hair and makeup. It's always optional, but you get in done through them or do it yourself
Posted by erbear81085[/QUOTE]

How are you the one hiring the group if everyone else still has to pay?  To me, that makes it seem like the whole group is hiring the team of stylists.

And I think you're going a little overboard.  Let your MOH do what she wants, as well as your other BMs.

SJM7538

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_moh-hair-and-makeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:0fa963ca-3070-447e-bf01-e7931a48ff93Post:b01258b4-1eb1-4939-89f9-6bc46d6f5e5c">Re:MOH Hair and makeup</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:MOH Hair and makeup : <strong>How are you the one hiring the group if everyone else still has to pay?</strong>  To me, that makes it seem like the whole group is hiring the team of stylists. And I think you're going a little overboard.  Let your MOH do what she wants, as well as your other BMs.
Posted by dtbluv[/QUOTE]

SHE is hiring the group to come in and do HER hair and makeup. If the other girls want to utulize the stylists they can. They only pay if they get their hair and make up done.  If not then the group only gets paid for doing the bride's hair and makeup.

nextrightthing

 I'm just saying I personally would considering offering to pay for the MOH (or help her with the cost) since money is obviously the issue, not the choice of stylist.

Kate61487

I doubt cost is really the only issue since the other stylist isn't just her normal stylist; it's her SIL.  If you had a sister who you knew would do your hair the way you wanted would you pay anyone else to do it, regardless of cost?  I don't think I would.....

OP I agree with PPs that saying the girls have to use your stylist or do it themselves is a little bridezilla-y.  That said I understand your unease/confusion regarding having a separate stylist come.  It's not that your MOH is having someone else do her hair it's that she wants to bring her to the house/hotel as well.  The other stylists might be a little irritated that there's a competitor there when they thought they'd gotten the job.  Or other girls might try to jump ship from one 'team' to the other the day of, meaning the people you hired wouldn't be getting the work they thought they were by signing on. 

So I don't think it's totally ridiculous for you to be uneasy about it, but I'd back off.  It's not a huge deal in the grand scheme of things. 

AddieCake

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_moh-hair-and-makeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0fa963ca-3070-447e-bf01-e7931a48ff93Post:6193e4b8-181d-4aa2-9e26-fb1eaf3bcef9">MOH Hair and makeup</a>:
[QUOTE]Then I thought maybe she could get ready at home then come after but she is my MOH so shouldn't she be there with me in the morning helping? 
Posted by erbear81085[/QUOTE]

<div>Let her have it done at home. What does she need to be there "helping" with?</div>

krose83013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_moh-hair-and-makeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0fa963ca-3070-447e-bf01-e7931a48ff93Post:6193e4b8-181d-4aa2-9e26-fb1eaf3bcef9">MOH Hair and makeup</a>:
[QUOTE]Hi my MOH has decided that the people I hired to do hair and makeup was too expensive, so she wants to bring in her sister in law to do just hers bc she won't charge as much. Getting hair and makeup was an option not required At first I was fine with it but now I don't think it would be fair to everyone else bc I'm not letting them bring in their own artists. Then I thought maybe she could get ready at home then come after but she is my MOH so shouldn't she be there with me in the morning helping? Am I just being a Bridezilla or do I just need to put my foot down? Thanks!
Posted by erbear81085[/QUOTE]

You need to pay for it. I have a MOH and 5 bridesmaids and myself to get ready on the wedding day. The hair and makeup is running me about $425 for all of us and they do a wonderful job. They did my hair and makeup for a wedding this past June which the bride didn't pay for but required us to all look the same. <div>
</div><div>Now I'm paying for them to get there hair done and makeup but they don't have to be matchy matchy. For instance as long as they have their hair up I'm fine with it.</div>

teachmegs1

Being in a wedding last year, I was just under the assumption that, "You go to who the bride chose/ect." I would never ask for her to allow me to use someone else. Obviously, I would prefer my hair dresser to do an up-do, but it's her day and I'm there to do whatever she needs.  And I know that being with all her girls and some family was something she was looking forward to the morning of.  If it were me, knowing that etiquette states otherwise, and deems me to be able to make my own choice on this matter, I'd still suck it up and use her hair dresser.  Up-do's are typically within 10-20 of eachother, no matter where you go.   Offer to pay the difference or pay for it all if thats the case. As a PP stated, its a smaller issue amongst the bigger things that you have going on that day.

musicalcanadianbride

For heaven's sake! Just ask her to be there when you're putting on your dress, so that you can take the "getting ready" shots of you and let her get her hair done how she likes prior to that time! This is not difficult. You don't need her there when you wake up... I'm pretty sure you wake up without her help the other 364 days of the year. 

If she doesn't want her hair done by your choice of stylist then you cannot force her. Have you considered that her SIL may do a better job that your choice? Maybe YOU should be exploring that alternative. If there's a family connection she might be able to do a special price, or at least be more "invested" than just some stranger you've hired.