"Old friends" inviting themselves

ams6n

My fiancé and I are planning a destination wedding to take place over a year from now. We want to keep it under 100 people and I have a lot of family. Tonight I got a phone call from a girl I played with when we were growing up, but have not talked to since I graduated 3 years ago. We also weren't good friends in high school. She was my best friends little sister in high school. I am not even friends with the best friend anymore. Anywho, she called to say that she would like to be invited to my wedding. I explained to her that we do not even have a location set and I have to worry about family first. She got hysterical and started crying and saying that she loved me and wanted to be invited and was upset her sister wasn't a bridesmaid. Turns out she was with one of my friends who my maid of honor. So, then my maid of honor gets on the phone and starts telling me I should invite her and I've hurt her feelings and it's just one person. I tried to explain to her and tell her it is my wedding and I don't even have a list yet. They were both hysterical and got off the phone. I am not worried about ruining a friendship that does not exist by not inviting this girl, but I’m afraid it will affect my friendship with my maid of honor. And I don't know how to handle the situation with her now.How does everyone else decide who to leave off the invite list and how to deal with upset people?

ndzenowski

How childish. If you're unsure you want to invite them, then odds are you probably shouldn't. You shouldn't allow yourself to be bullied into going over your budget or original guest count.

aMrsin09

Given that you are on teh East Coast and the time stamp on this post, i would chalk it up to a the wedding equivalent of the drunken "I love you man" I'd talk to your MOH tomorrow and explain that you don't have a location or guest list yet and it's too early to be making those decisions. And what CS said.

abs99

I would talk to MOH in person or at another time that is more private. I would explain that you are limited in your list and you would really appreciate if she got behind you. Try not to let other people influence your and fi's guest list. Of course parents will get to give their input, but just shut down anyone else who wants to give their two cents. YOu can do this politely but firmly.

abs99

I am betting alcohol was involved...

lpstl

I secon the drunk dial theory. May they awake with deep regret and nasty hangovers.

Travis&Cari

I’m afraid it will affect my friendship with my maid of honor. And I don't know how to handle the situation with her now.I hope you mean because you are angry with her and not the other way around.  That was completely childish and uncalled for.  You did fine.  Way to stick to your guns.  Your MOH gets a fail for the night.

Travis&Cari

ANNNND I broke the knot!  Sorry.  I will leave now ::hangs head in shame::

MissSarah786

I just got married. There were quite a few people where I thought, "Why the heck were you invited? And who are you?"Basically, if you haven't spoken to a person in the last year, they shouldn't get an invite. Let her cry it out.

thesuninherhead

I imagine alcohol had a large role to play in this.

colleenspencer

Sounds like thisw girl is just looking for a reason to go on an awesome vacation the MOH.

Simply Fated

Sounds like these girls were just looking for drama.</s>

banana468

I'd have a LONG talk with your MOH about how you feel as a result of her stirring that pot.There were people that DH and I chose not to invite and we stand by the decision.  Some people we don't talk to anymore and others who we don't see all that often.  I recently got back in touch with a friend who thought, "If I was in your life 3 years ago you would have asked me to be a BM."  I don't know that I would have even invited her 3 years ago.