Wedding Etiquette Forum
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Should they be at my shower?

Hi Ladies,Are your bridesmaids supposed to attend your shower? I currently live in a city with 2 of my BM's , but my shower is being thrown in my hometown 3 hr drive away. MY FI"s family who live here are already saying they're probably not attending, but should the bridesmaids make the trip???

Re: Should they be at my shower?

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    They aren't required to be there, no.
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    They should be invited, but unless they're hosting they don't have to attend. I'm guessing they'll try to, though.
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    Well hopefully they would, but they certainly aren't required to.
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    If they have the time/money to travel 3hrs for your shower, then it would be nice if they did.  Are they obligated to?  No.
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    If you send them an invitation, they will decide whether to attend or not.
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    They should be invited, but not expected to return.
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    IMO, no one should be expected or required to attend an OOT shower. Showers are given for the convenience of the guests, to have an opportunity to give a gift before the wedding, Because it's not "proper" ettiquette to take a gift to the wedding. They are not given just to get presents, or to give BMs yet another opportunity to spend time and money to show support for the bride. Invite them, but don't expect them to come. Then if they do, you can be pleasantly surprised and grateful.
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