Dear Coworker

[Deleted User]

Your breath smells like a butt. This is a small conference room. Please do your open mouth breathing in the other direction.Love,cew

jajph1974

lol @ assbreath

Stackeye210

I just laughed out loud, thank you!

Brie2010

Dear coworker,When you asked me, "Do you like hamburgers?" I thought it was a trick question.  But thank you for sending me the free hamburger coupon as a result.  You rock!Love,Brie

Mrs.C-To-Be

I cracked up at that one.  Nice.

laurenclaire1386

Dear Boss,You are truly the best boss I've ever had and I think it's really cool that we work out of your house and your wife makes us lunch everyday and you encourage afternoon cocktails.  However, you are downstairs from my loft office SNORING loud enough to pull the paint off the walls.  I love my job, but I want to die right now because snoring irritates me more than anything.

Stackeye210

Dear Coworker - Please do not bring in baked goods and not identify yourself.  First cookies, now yummy looking bread......but I can't try any of it because you are anonymous and won't say who you are.  You could be nasty cat lady who smells like cat pee and dirty hair, so because of that I must decline your offerings.Thank you,Mrs Stack

SwedishChick2011

cew - Is this also the raw onion-shiiting coworker?

[Deleted User]

stack - I hate that about food days at our office. I have to watch everyone come in with their dishes so that I know which ones are safe to eat.

[Deleted User]

coco - No, but she got me real bad last week. It was the worst yet. This is drink 7 pots of coffee a day coworker. Apparently, she's never heard of gum.

kate51485

Dear Coworker,I know you like to hear the sound of your own voice, but please, just stop talking.xoxo,Kate

georgia_bride09

Dear Coworker, Please, for the love of all that is Holy, close your mouth a bit when you laugh. If I can hear you from another hall, I can only assume the person you are laughing toward can see your tonsils or lack thereof. Nobody needs to see that. Thanks,Your colleague with the twitching eye

SwedishChick2011

I tried to avoid eating baked stuff from my old boss.  One time I saw her give her finger a big wet lick and then touch someone's cake and give to them.  After that, I always imagined her licking everything, so I couldn't eat her food anymore.

SwedishChick2011

cew - Coffee breath is the worst.  Yuck.

calle28

Dear Coworker, You eat really loud. Whenever you go downstairs to the cafeteria, I put my earphones on so I don't hear you chewing and sometimes I still hear you, through my earphones! Please close your mouth when you chew, we would all really appreciate it and so would our ears. Thanks!

LesPaul

Or the coworker with mouse poop in her kitchen.  Yeah - we won't be enjoying your food offerings, thanks anyway.

[Deleted User]

I just wonder, don't they taste the bad breath? Doesn't it bother them?

barbbhoww

i have to chime in becauseMy dear co-worker-Please stop taking a dump in our only bathroom at 10 am everyday.  We all know you do it when you come out smelling like lysol.Thank you, OH so much.

SwedishChick2011

I just wonder, don't they taste the bad breath? Doesn't it bother them? You'd think so, but apparently not.  It probably tastes good to them.

NotNumbers

Dear Coworker We are all aware that you hate the new space we've moved to.  We all hate it, but the rest of us can get over it.  Please stop biitching and moaning every morning about how you always have a headache within 10 minutes of arriving.  Try being less of a whiny cry-baby and maybe you'll feel better. Lovepc

MissLeahM

Dear Coworker,please stop wasting my time by sending in all of your crazy hockey club people. We have nothing to do with hockey registration, and I am not getting paid to be a hockey assistant. Ps. Pay me more and we'll talk.Leah

redhotrachel35

Dear Boss, Please stop moaning loudly everytime you stretch or yawn. It sounds like you're getting laid in your office and it's really grossing me out. Thanks so much! Love, me.

AlexiaANDRobert

Dear thebump,I've been married 11 days.  I'm not ready to know what my baby is going to be when he/she grows up.I'll come to you when I want information.Thanks,Alexia

katiewhompus

Dear Coworker : The TRT at our sister school called to talk to our boss, he did not call to hear your life story. The correct answer to "Is Steve in" would be "no  he is not, can I take a message?" not "No he's at guidance but I'm his TA and I'm proficient in the following programs and I can take a message or have him email you because he should be down soon..."Trt at our sister school is my dad, now he feels the pain I feel ALL DAY when she does this.