F/U to Minors and Alcohol...

ExpatPumpkin

FOLLOW-UP QUESTION:
To those who mentioned the possibility of a reception being closed down if a minor were caught drinking... 
Who would close it down?  Do the police routinely watch over receptions?  For the life of me, I CANNOT imagine that a venue would close down a reception over this.  Would they call the police themselves?  What a way to run off clients and ruin a wedding!
If that had happened at my wedding, I think the Westin staff would have told an adult to control the kids...  Why would they ruin everyone's night because of a kid sneaking a drink?  It's in their best interest to make the night go well, not shut it down.  
Just seems like a paranoid fear.  Has anyone ever been to a wedding that was actually shut down because of this?

ButtonsPepper

I was 19 at my sisters wedding. My dad informed them that I was the MOH and I had a hotel room at the hotel 5 feet away from the reception place. That guy served me the whole night (in moderation-ish).... He should not have done this... but he did.

I think maybe reception places seem strict so people don't expect they can drink, but I can't imagine shutting a reception down. Even to stop serving alcohol seems a bit over the top. I would think a manager would just talk to the child's parents, or the bride and groom...

danieliza1127

In my area, every wedding reception has an off duty police officer that does security.  We had to hire one.  I would imagine he was watching out for stuff like that.  While I don't think they would shut down a whole reception if a kid snuck a drink, I do think they would if it were blatant like a bartender serving obvious minors or obvious minors walking around drinking out of bottles.  Some receptions are classier than others you know?

ButtonsPepper

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fu-minors-alcohol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:111d5b6e-81ad-4c7e-a117-008942b217ebPost:75aa7e6b-1a3a-467f-b51b-4cebfa0fd265">Re: F/U to Minors and Alcohol...</a>:
[QUOTE]In my area, every wedding reception has an off duty police officer that does security.  We had to hire one.  I would imagine he was watching out for stuff like that.  While I don't think they would shut down a whole reception if a kid snuck a drink, I do think they would if it were blatant like a bartender serving obvious minors or obvious minors walking around drinking out of bottles.  Some receptions are classier than others you know?
Posted by danieliza1127[/QUOTE]

Hahaha, agreed~

lyndausvi

I do not get it either.  When I was over 16 but under 21 my family use to ask me to get drinks for them to see if I could get severed.  If I could, they let me drink.  I never really did drink though, because at that point I was the driver so my parents could drink.

 I have never seen people get even carded at a wedding, but maybe laws have changed.  I can't see our hotel shutting down the party.  They might threaten, but not actually follow through.

sarahmk5

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fu-minors-alcohol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:111d5b6e-81ad-4c7e-a117-008942b217ebPost:75aa7e6b-1a3a-467f-b51b-4cebfa0fd265">Re: F/U to Minors and Alcohol...</a>:
[QUOTE]In my area, every wedding reception has an off duty police officer that does security.
Posted by danieliza1127[/QUOTE]

That's crazy - I can't imagine having to do that, and the borough we're having the wedding in is ridiculous with their liquor laws since it's a college town.

Kati0105

I can't see our hotel shutting down the party.  They might threaten, but not actually follow through.

Yeah I can't really see my venue doing it, and luckily we don't have too many young adults so I don't foresee it being an issue.  I drank at my aunt's wedding when I was 19, but I had to sneak drinks because they wouldn't serve me.  I could only see it really being an issue if a teenager got really drunk.

lyndausvi

On a legal stance no hotel in their right might would say anything differently about minors and alcohol. Of course they are going to tell you they will shut the place down.  Any other response would lead to people thinking it's not a problem. 

 Knowing there might be consquences to minors drinking will more than likely lessen it occuring.

mocha beans

I think some of it is because IF the minor is drinking then drives, and IF they are pulled over and the cop suspects or detects booze, then the venue can be held liable and fined or lose their license.  A lot of if's, but still people get gunshy and the liquor laws can be brutal.  I personally don't think the servers should be held as responsible as they are, because in the end it's the person drinking that made the decision to drive drunk, not the bartender.

Kati0105

I have never, ever seen someone carded at any of the weddings I have attended, both classy and not classy.

Really?  I've been carded at almost every wedding I've attended, even this year at age 25, and even when MOH.

ExpatPumpkin

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fu-minors-alcohol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:111d5b6e-81ad-4c7e-a117-008942b217ebPost:de202968-1635-4aa5-89cb-baf915302c2e">Re: F/U to Minors and Alcohol...</a>:
[QUOTE] I personally don't think the servers should be held as responsible as they are, because in the end it's the person drinking that made the decision to drive drunk, not the bartender.
Posted by mocha beans[/QUOTE]

<div>I couldn't agree more.  People need to take responsibility for their own foolishness.  You drink and drive?  That's YOUR problem, not the server's.</div>

suedoe

I was carded in MA years ago at a wedding. I had to go home to get my ID becuase they wouldn't serve me. MA is very strick with their drinkning laws.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fu-minors-alcohol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:111d5b6e-81ad-4c7e-a117-008942b217ebPost:3e281c61-4918-4099-ad84-abc0ee921df8">Re: F/U to Minors and Alcohol...</a>:
[QUOTE]On a legal stance no hotel in their right might would say anything differently about minors and alcohol. Of course they are going to tell you they will shut the place down.  Any other response would lead to people thinking it's not a problem.   Knowing there might be consquences to minors drinking will more than likely lessen it occuring.
Posted by lyndausvi[/QUOTE]

Exactly. But technically, if they WERE caught, they would loose their liquor license and therefore a ton of revenue, just like any other bar. (Maybe not the first offense, but still...) What if a minor DID drive home and got into an accident? Or commited a crime while drunk? Or had a medical problem?

I can't see them shutting it down, but I can definitely see them kicking the offender out.

FI and I don't have any young cousins, so everyone at our wedding will be over the age of 22 or under the age of 6. Thankfully.

mwhitson14

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fu-minors-alcohol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:111d5b6e-81ad-4c7e-a117-008942b217ebPost:3e281c61-4918-4099-ad84-abc0ee921df8">Re: F/U to Minors and Alcohol...</a>:
[QUOTE]On a legal stance no hotel in their right might would say anything differently about minors and alcohol. Of course they are going to tell you they will shut the place down.  Any other response would lead to people thinking it's not a problem.   Knowing there might be consquences to minors drinking will more than likely lessen it occuring.
Posted by lyndausvi[/QUOTE]

Absolutely. Oour hotel has a no alcohol policy, so if someone asks, I HAVE to tell them alcohol isn't allowed. I admit though, if someone brings something in without asking, I don't say anything. I do get on to people who try to bring alcohol into the pool area, but that's just because I don't want to have to deal with a drunk falling into the pool.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fu-minors-alcohol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:111d5b6e-81ad-4c7e-a117-008942b217ebPost:18a312be-80ec-40de-9bfa-8bda74005155">Re: F/U to Minors and Alcohol...</a>:
[QUOTE]I was carded in MA years ago at a wedding. I had to go home to get my ID becuase they wouldn't serve me. MA is very strick with their drinkning laws.
Posted by suedoe[/QUOTE]

FI is from MA, though he hasn't really lived there much since he was 21. But a friend of mine who went to school in Boston said that bars can't have ladies nights or 2-for-1 specials, or beer pong tournaments.

pandasquishy

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fu-minors-alcohol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:111d5b6e-81ad-4c7e-a117-008942b217ebPost:dada4ea5-bed6-4b96-820d-dd02e17eaaaa">Re: F/U to Minors and Alcohol...</a>:
[QUOTE]I have never, ever seen someone carded at any of the weddings I have attended, both classy and not classy.
Posted by mag920[/QUOTE]

<div>Our venue mentioned at one of our first meetings that their bartenders card.  I've never been to  a wedding there so I don't know if they'll follow through, though they have mentioned this fact more than once. I suspect it doesn't even matter. One cousin we're concerned about who is under 21 and a huge binge drinker I'm positive has a fake ID.  It's the norm (unfortunately) around here that the kids who want to drink all have fake IDs.</div>

lpstl

I've never been carded, or seen anyone carded at a wedding. It's pretty much status quo in our family to allow anyone 18+ to have a few drinks at events like weddings. No one is irresponsible with it.

Kati0105

I also agree about MA (not that I didn't do plenty of drinking there in my college days) - I remember whenever we went to concerts there they would only serve to people over 21 with MA IDs so even though I was 21 my senior year I had to have a local friend buy my beers when we went to concerts.

lilgina64

There are beer pong tournaments every monday night at the Kell's Bar in Allston right next to Boston University and Boston College.

They have ladies nights but they aren't 2 for 1, it's usually just a cover charge that gets waived.

MA is definitely stricter about ID's but they let ANY passport go. My foreign friends used to use anybody's passport and always got into bars even if the passport looked nothing like them. It was really weird because fake ID's get turned away all the time. Now if you're a college student over 21 you can apply for a "identification card" and that's basically not a license to drive, just a license to drink.

sucrets4

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fu-minors-alcohol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:111d5b6e-81ad-4c7e-a117-008942b217ebPost:71a004f2-0dd1-48b0-b1af-ddb443cf9d87">Re: F/U to Minors and Alcohol...</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: F/U to Minors and Alcohol... :  FI and I don't have any young cousins, so everyone at our wedding will be over the age of 22 or under the age of 6. Thankfully.
Posted by msmerymac[/QUOTE]

Watch out for those sneaky 6 year olds.

3plus

We were told that the bartender would be carding and we will also have a security guy that the venue provides.  For all 30 of us :shrug:

Our venue coordinator told us that they would be taking all precautions because they don't want to lose their liquor licence and their ability to hold weddings in the future.  If something happened to a minor that had been allowed to have even one drink, they could be held severely liable.

terbear_86

I work at a wedding venue and we have definitely shut down parties before. Not to the scale of "everyone go home, party done" but to the tune of : Shutting down the bar from open to just non alcoholic, to nothing after people started sneaking their own liquor inside.  People were allowed a water and the minute they set it down, it was taken away by waitstaff. Stationed servers at bathroom doors to take drinks from people going inside. We card, I card everyone under the age of 30. It does happen. Probably not everywhere. And it had to go REALLY far before we shut it down like that, but it did happen. And honey, just because your daughter is a five ten 100 pound bombshell does not mean she is drinking age. She can't even walk in her high heels and she has no features that would say she is over 16. Do not tell me she's visiting from her freshman year of college and you say it's alright that she "forgot" her drivers (permit) License.

Shaki

my dj  is a police officer lol so i know everything will be under control but im not going to have many teenagers there anyways so im glad about that