Shower question

ivystar57

I'm a BM in an upcoming wedding and the girls are trying to nail down the details of the shower/bach party weekend.  We'll do breakfast (just the BMs) at the bride's apt, then the shower at a BM's apt, mani/pedis after, then dinner and drinking for the bach party.  There are two different invites going out, one for the shower and one for the bach party, and there will be some overlap. 

The MOH is trying to figure out how to handle the mani/pedi situation though.  Anyone is welcome to come if they like and knowing how many people can come would help us set up the appts.  But if we invite the whole group, obviously we have to pay and that could get pricy in NYC.  Would you even put it on the invite?  Thoughts?  Comments?  Flames?

Julz629

Someone on my local board posted this yesterday.  Personally, I would never assume that someone else was paying for me, but I could see how others might be confused.

She eventually decided something along the lines of the following:

Please RSVP to XXXXX by Wednesday, April 7th. For those who are interested in getting manis and pedis, please contact me for further information. If you are not planning on attending the pampering session, we hope you will still be able to join us for the “Girls’ Night In” festivities.

When people contacted her, she could let them know the costs.  It is tacky to specifically call out that they would have to pay on the invites, but for your own sake, I don't think you would want anyone assuming its covered.

ivystar57

Yeah there's no way I would recommend saying "hey you get to pay for your own" on the invite.  hell no.

But that's a good suggestion.  Thanks!

vallyhoo

This question is too difficult.

ivystar57

FOUR DAYS!?!?!?!! VALLY! gotta admit I might be a little excited for you.... hope it doesn't show too much.

ring_pop

This might sound dumb, but can you do manis/pedis before the shower?

vallyhoo

ring has a good idear!

aww thanks Ivster

ivystar57

Nope that's not dumb at all, Ring. I had considered it, but I think the timing might be tight. 

danieliza1127

I think I would just keep the mani/pedis to the BMs only.  It just seems easier for one thing, plus the more people that go, the more crowded it will be and the longer it will take.  It's unlikely for any place to be able to get that many people in at the same time, so then you aren't really even doing it all together anyway you know?

ivystar57

I was also thinking about that, Dani.  As much as I want to give the bride everything she wants and more, I just can't imagine that the logistics will be easy.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

If people RSVP yes to both the shower and b-party, I'd just call them and say, "Hey, the BMs, the bride, and a few other people are probably getting together to get manis/pedis between the two events. You are welcome to join us if you'd like." Then it isn't a formal invitation, just a "feel free to tag along" kind of invite.