Wedding Etiquette Forum
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I can't seem to get past this.

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Re: I can't seem to get past this.

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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cant-seem-past-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:1c09aa84-b240-4472-89ad-026f904f99b4Post:89fc8324-7399-4ac9-8b30-06618ba11077">Re: I can't seem to get past this.</a>:
    [QUOTE]Ok, well this is a bit personal, but since I cant DD, I might as well let you know that I contacted my insurance company to find a therapist in my area. Would you like updates? Maybe page me every week to make sure that I'm going to my appointments, I'll keep a blog journal of my progress. No. I think I'll just keep my problems to myself from now on.
    Posted by jessjo04[/QUOTE]

    Dude. You can't expect us to sit back and not say ANYTHING when everything you saw about him is negative. What do you want us to say? What's the point of posting? We're going to respond based on what you tell us.

    The responses I read on here were from a caring, thoughful perspective and many people seem genuinely concerned about you and your relationship. YOU post the threads. YOU tell us what's going on, and now YOU are upset because people are concerned? That doesn't make any sense.
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    Jess, if you know a bit about psychology and you know you're depressed, that gives you less of a reason to do nothing.

    I don't think people are trying to be mean. They are honestly trying to help.
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    But, based on your wanting to be a psychologist, shouldn't you be aware that depression is treatable and makes a drastic improvement in your life?

    Shouldn't you also be aware that alcohol is a depressant and is not a good idea?

    Recognizing your self-destructive tendancies is usually the first step to solving the problem.  Unless you're willing to take those first steps and deal with it, people are going to get tired of hearing the whining and the lack of activity on your part to fix what you're whining about.

    Especially when you seem to do everything you can to compound the situation.

    "You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
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    Huh.  Ok hes a great person. too bad you dont share that aspect of him with us.  you vent and ASK for advice regarding the bad stuff he does.

    I honestly felt bad for you but now I really dont care.  you got great feedback.  your life is what you choose it to be.  dont come on here  b*tching about your DH, ask for advice, get great thoughtful, kind words and then get all condesending in your response. 

    You basically have written a live blog.journal and shared it with us so your smartasss answer  of starting one was kinda dumb.

    since you know so much about psychology, you probably know how to help yourself without looking here.

    To answer your poll....I vote your DH is a douchbag.  if you didnt somewhat think so, you wouldnt have had it as a choice. 
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    BTW:  STFU wasn't an option in the poll.  I voted, but it reflects my irritation at you, moreso that your situation.

    "You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
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    You know, it's probably a good thing we can't delete anymore.  Now the proof of what you do and say when you're drinking is still here the next day.

    Maybe having to face up to that is going to help you understand that you MAY have a drinking problem.  And maybe, just maybe, stopping consuming depressants every day of your life will help you with that pesky depression problem you have.

    I doubt it.  You're enjoying wallowing and the attention you get from it.  Wallow away, but don't expect people to continue to be sympathetic.

    "You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cant-seem-past-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:1c09aa84-b240-4472-89ad-026f904f99b4Post:bc8986a4-4762-4fea-9d12-d16799b56b60">Re: I can't seem to get past this.</a>:
    [QUOTE]I go to a psychiatrist, but I think I need to go back to a psychologist. I realize that much of my problems stem from the way I think about and react to things. I work full time, and my boss (mom) doesnt like when I take off mornings for my once every three months psychiatrist appointment, I cant see the once a week thing working. DH knows I have issues with depression, but he can't understand how I'm sad for 'no reason'.
    Posted by jessjo04[/QUOTE]

    to be honest, him not understanding about your depression is a HUGE issue in my opinion.
    as someone who suffered quite badly from it, and had a very unsupportive boyfriend at the time.. that does even more damage to your brain.  When the spouse is telling you "you have nothing to be depressed about" then you think "what is wrong with me". see the pattern?
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    Sorry.  It's a reasonable assumption to make.  I doubt I'm the only one who made it.

    I'm not being an ass.  I've tried to help you.  I've sympathized with you.  I've felt awful for the way your husband treats you.  I've thought him a douche and tried to suggest that you needed to deal with your issues before you actually married someone who regularly made you feel awful about yourself - including being happy other men were buying you drinks at the bar so he didn't have to.

    My patience has run more than thin with you and this entire situation.  I'm not being an ass.  I'm being exceptionally nice compared to most of the stuff I've typed out and backspaced.  All of that is stuff I would've said to anyone new around here.  So you've also made me a hypocrit because I honestly hate that crap. 

    I just don't think you can actually handle it.

    "You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
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    Was there a post DD'd in here somewhere?
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    Vacation with Alix, Andy, Mandy, and FLORENCE. AND HER MACHINE.

    The Margarita Evolution
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    Yes there was fische, the one where she said she called her insurance. The one that implied we were being overbearing and nosey.
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    Yep.  I was told to stop being an ass.  Oh, and she wasn't drinking last night.

    Apparenty Jess can still delete, just not the main post.  Lesson learned.  Always quote.

    Always.

    "You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
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    Me thinks so fische.
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    Well, I'll be damned.
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    Vacation with Alix, Andy, Mandy, and FLORENCE. AND HER MACHINE.

    The Margarita Evolution
    image
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    She also edited the main topic.

    Surprisingly, I'm not surprised.  I'm also even less sympathetic.


    "You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
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    Huh, i didnt realize she dd'd half of her posts in here. Good job.

    People were just trying to help you jess, but its starting to turn into the boy who cried wolf. You can only say this stuff so many times before we either stop caring or stop taking it seriously. I hope you do get the help you need to get to make this better.
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    Huh. Well, next time she goes batshit about a DD, I'm totally gonna throw in the crate o' hippos. It hasn't been brought out in awhile.
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    Crate o'  hippos?  I'm going for a bloody C&P. 

    Sorry, your crazy won't just go away because you deleted your thread Jess.  It's still there and most of us saw it.

    Deleting also makes most of us even less sympathetic towards you and your situation so your next negative AW'ing about your husband (ohhhhhhhhh poor me, tell me I'm hot!) won't go quite so far before it turns negative. 

    I suppose that's why you're trolling around the nest, huh?

    "You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
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    Seriously? Youre just deleting all of your posts in this thread now?
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    Way to completely change your OP Jessjo.

    "It's shart week." -georgiabride
    "This post is seriously retarded." -Stackeye210
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    Miss
    Mrs & ZOMG we built a howse!
    being healthy. blog.
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    I dunno why, but I just want to keep posting in here to keep it at the top.

    You know.  Because I'm an ass.

    "You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
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    Go for it wading ;)
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    Way to kick someone when they're down. I hate myself for getting emotional over what 'internet strangers' say. I thought you guys were my friends. Guess I'll keep my interactions as impersonal as possible from now on.

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    Have you ever watched the show, "Intervention," Jess?

    I'm sure the people intervening thought that their family and friends loved them until that day.

    I'm pretty sure the people intervening were doing so because they loved them.

    Which side of this do you see yourself on?

    "You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
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    So you would rather people validate your opinions instead of being honest?
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    Jess, we do care, but you cant go deleting everything you post as a cop out. We all gave supportive advice and it wasnt until you got sarcastic with us about our intentions that things turned. I will repeat, i just hope you do what you need to do. You being happy, is the ideal end result.
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    Jess you changed your OP completely.  Like WTF man.

    I feel for you, I really do.  But like EVERYONE said, YOU have to help yourself and want help.

    I really hope that therapy works out well for you.  I think everyone (even people who are happy and have perfect lives) should go to therapy. 


    "It's shart week." -georgiabride
    "This post is seriously retarded." -Stackeye210
    image
    image
    Miss
    Mrs & ZOMG we built a howse!
    being healthy. blog.
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    Its not a cop out. I put very personal information out there and people used it against me.
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    It was never used against you.  No one said "He's right, you're fat."  They said you need help.  Same thing that's been said time and time again.

    "You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
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    How is that using against you?  People were being helpful Jess.  Internet stranger or not, I want to see you happy and treated well by not only yourself but your husband too.

    You have to love yourself before you let someone love you.  We all have insecurities, but this is a little bit too extreme. 

    "It's shart week." -georgiabride
    "This post is seriously retarded." -Stackeye210
    image
    image
    Miss
    Mrs & ZOMG we built a howse!
    being healthy. blog.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cant-seem-past-this?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:1c09aa84-b240-4472-89ad-026f904f99b4Post:45806b6a-a866-4baa-8fbe-c8e2631a3e2b">Re: I can't seem to get past this.</a>:
    [QUOTE]Its not a cop out. I put very personal information out there and people used it against me.
    Posted by jessjo04[/QUOTE]

    You asked for our opinion, and we gave it to you.  You got a lot of really thoughtful, caring advice in this thread, so I find your attitude pretty childish.  Like said above, if we have a certain impresion of your husband, it's only because you're the one who put it out there.
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