Wedding/Reception Timeline -- Which Works Better?

[Deleted User]

We keep going back and forth on times. We have lots of time to really decide, and I can put TBD on the website, but I sort of wanted to pin down a time to put on our website since the Save The Dates are going out next month.

We have 4 hours open bar (OR we can pay for another hour, but I'd LIKE to avoid that if possible). Most photos will be done before (only family will be done after the ceremony).

What would you say would work better:

OPTION 1:

• Wedding at 4pm. 
• Family pictures 4:30-5, so the bulk of the people should be at the reception between 5-5:30 (it's about 15 minutes away, but the ceremony is in a park, so I figure people might mingle around the gardens for a few minutes before leaving).
• Start appetizers and cocktail hour at 5:30, but don't start serving drinks until 6
• Dinner at 7
• Over at 10

OPTION 2:

• Wedding at 4pm. 
• Family pictures 4:30-5, so the bulk of the people should be at the reception between 5-5:30 (it's about 15 minutes away, but the ceremony is in a park, so I figure people might mingle around the gardens for a few minutes before leaving).
• Start appetizers and cocktail hour at 5:30
• Dinner at 6:30, but close the bar from 6:30-7:00
• Over at 10

OPTION 3:

• Eff all of the above and just pay an extra $1,000 for an extra hour bar and have the reception from 5:30-10:30.

KellyBrian2013

Two things to keep in mind: closing the bar during dinner is pretty common AND you generally want to end he bar about 30 minutes before the end of the reception...

lyndausvi

if you have the money option 3

if not option 2

arendiva

I would say to do a 5:30-10:30 coctail hour/reception and just close the bar at 9:30. That way guests have the last hour to sober up before they drive home.

Maybone

Our bar will be closed for dinner. (still a year out, but this has been our plan since booking a venue.)
6:15 Ceremony (roughly, not sure about the exact start time yet.)
7-8 Cocktail hour/announcements/cake cutting
8-9 Dinner, Bar is CLOSED
9-12 party!

Viczaesar

You have an hour break in between the end of the ceremony and the beginning of cocktail hour (whether or not cocktail hour has cocktails at that time), and the location is only 15 minutes away.  I think you should cut down the gap.

[Deleted User]

I would go with option 2. As a guest who just came from an outdoor wedding (especially if it's warm) and then being provided some food, I'm going to need some beverages to quench my thirst. I would rather see last call for alcohol & see if you can arrange for pop & water to be left out on bar or a table for people to help themselves at the end if they need to sober up without adding another big bill to your budget.

[Deleted User]

Thanks guys, I'm thinking the closing the bar during dinner thing will work. I'm going to ask if we can have bottles of wine on the tables for dinner, so we'll see. 

Also--to the person saying 10 is early: It is, but we can't afford to host 6 hours of bar to make the party to until midnight, and our guest list is mostly older and from an hour away, so I don't even think they will stay until 10 to be honest. If we are still wanting to hang out, we are allowed to do that at the venue all night, but the bar will close. I may see if there are a LOT of people still there we can extend the bar on a whim that night. That's another good question for the caterer.

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_weddingreception-timeline-which-works-better?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:1e72b2a7-5b5b-452d-bef9-4138a0e78c21Post:2f0908ed-a5a9-4f43-bbf1-19c8a90658ff">Re:Wedding/Reception Timeline Which Works Better?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:Wedding/Reception Timeline Which Works Better?: This. Cocktail hour needs to start when your guests are first likely to arrive. Do not assume they will hang out for 45 minutes to watch you take photos. This to me is a far bigger deal than when the bar closes.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Well, here's the thing. I'm sure we can start the "cocktail hour" at 5, but I really don't want to pay for alcohol to start at 5. I'm sure the food can be out and they can have a seat sign the guest book and have water/pop/tea and appetizers and cookies, but is that rude? Can we just say the reception immediately follows, but the bar won't open until 5:30? That was my worry. I can have them immediately go over, no problem.</div><div>
</div><div>I really don't anticipate anyone getting there until 5:15-5:30. The reception is 15 minutes away for me if I went there right now, but that's assuming people immediately get up and out. It's in a park, and I think people getting out after the ceremony will take some time, because we're expecting 200-250 people, so they are going to be creating traffic to get there and then park, etc.

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ceceibson

We were married at 3:30 at one outdoor venue.  The wedding was over at 4:00.  At 4:00, we had cocktail hour up and ready to go at our second outdoor venue about 10 minutes from the first.  While a few guests lingered at the beautiful public garden where our ceremony had been held, most of them headed directly to the reception venue to party.

I would have been embarassed had my guests arrived at the reception venue to find.....nothing.

While I understand your budgetary concerns, this needs to be about your guests.  What are you expecting your guests to do with themselves for nearly an hour?

As for your ending time, we had a band at the reception and had them stop playing around 9:30.  People were starting to drift off by then.  The bar closed around 10:00, maybe.

Those of us left standing went to an outdoor bar on the beach near our home to continue the party.

athomfor

"I'm sure we can start the "cocktail hour" at 5, but I really don't want to pay for alcohol to start at 5. I'm sure the food can be out and they can have a seat sign the guest book and have water/pop/tea and appetizers and cookies, but is that rude? Can we just say the reception immediately follows, but the bar won't open until 5:30?"

I would be pretty irritated if I arrived at an event but was told I couldn't have my beverage of choice until half an hour after the event started.

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_weddingreception-timeline-which-works-better?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:1e72b2a7-5b5b-452d-bef9-4138a0e78c21Post:d6dbfb45-b3f3-4afe-a59e-724cb525fb8e">Re: Wedding/Reception Timeline -- Which Works Better?</a>:
[QUOTE]We were married at 3:30 at one outdoor venue.  The wedding was over at 4:00.  At 4:00, we had cocktail hour up and ready to go at our second outdoor venue about 10 minutes from the first.  While a few guests lingered at the beautiful public garden where our ceremony had been held, most of them headed directly to the reception venue to party. I would have been embarassed had my guests arrived at the reception venue to find.....nothing. While I understand your budgetary concerns, this needs to be about your guests.  What are you expecting your guests to do with themselves for nearly an hour? As for your ending time, we had a band at the reception and had them stop playing around 9:30.  People were starting to drift off by then.  The bar closed around 10:00, maybe. Those of us left standing went to an outdoor bar on the beach near our home to continue the party.
Posted by ceceibson[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>They are going to have everything available to them except the alcohol, and that will start when they actually get there or 15 minutes after. There's just no way people will be there at 5pm with the amount of traffic coming out of the park. The earliest I think they will be there is 5:15, which is why I think 5:30 works, after finding parking, finding their escort cards, signing the guestbook, etc.</div><div>
</div><div>Still, if it's that big of a deal, I could always close the bar for an hour during dinner. I wanted to limit that to a half hour, but it's a big wedding, so I don't think people will be done with dinner in 30 minutes. Does this sound like a better plan?

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mtrosales

I haven't read all of the above posts -- but at my venue, if we want to close the bar during dinner, we have to have wine service during. So, we just paid for the extra open bar hour [it worked out cheaper to just do that].

Otherwise, I think you could just close the bar the last hour.

staceys9502

Also check if they will allow you to do a tab bar instead of an open bar--that way you dont have to pay the set fee for the number of guests, but only what gets ordered.  Our venue is doing this during our dinner and for an hour after our packaged time is up.  Its much cheaper and guests can still have a drink if they would like!