Thanks!

hlq2011

Thanks, ladies. 

Snippylynn

I can't care this much.

doctabroccoli

Oh thank god.  I thought you were gonna say you were having a secret wedding.  I'm glad my head didn't prematurely explode.

Mrs.B6302007

I guess I'm not understanding how what they did is affecting you other than you'll get an invite to a fake wedding.  You always have the option of not going.

akhensley81

Is there a full moon today?

danieliza1127

There have been two posts today about people getting married and keeping it a secret and then having a "real wedding" later.  Read those and see everyone's responses and that'll give you a big idea of how people feel about that junk.

Bubbalub

It would bother me too, I think. How long have they been married? How close is your FI with his cousin?

I have a cousin that up and got married secretly and when it came out we all raised an eyebrow, but we are not really close anymore so beyond the family gossip aspect I didn't really care.

marriedfilingjointly

They changed their status to married on FB and blocked their family so they wouldn't see it?  What a bunch of douchebags. 

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_secret-wedding-long-ish?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:1f49ac9f-4a23-4d22-9795-e235183500a4Post:f7efd35d-2ca5-4348-aa2f-ba60febaf7db">Re: Secret wedding (long-ish)</a>:
[QUOTE]Is there a full moon today?
Posted by akhensley81[/QUOTE]

My calendar shows the 21st...so...almost there..

danieliza1127

Also, yeah ditto MrsB.  There's nothing much you can do about it.  You feel how you feel about it, your FI can feel how he feels about it, and if you guys are invited to a "wedding" next year, you can either go or not go.  That's pretty much it.  At least it's just a cousin and not his sister, a cousin is distant enough you can just stay out of it.

hlq2011

Oh... one other question... which name should we use when we invite them to our wedding?  Jill's maiden or married??

FutureMrsTR

I can see what today's theme is...

waltzingmatilda13

Just pretend you ever saw anything. You can see by the posts in the other 2 threads how most people would react. It's best to distance yourself from the whole thing and if your FI doesn't care, just try to let it go.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

I just wouldn't go. Sorry, they don't deserve my respect, IMO.

hlq2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_secret-wedding-long-ish?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:1f49ac9f-4a23-4d22-9795-e235183500a4Post:59d0e43c-5062-4358-8a55-6e8da2b7e496">Re: Secret wedding (long-ish)</a>:
[QUOTE]I can see what today's theme is...
Posted by FutureMrsTR[/QUOTE]

Yeah, sorry... I think seeing the other posts reminded me about it, and it's been bugging me.

AllAboutTheBenjamin

I wouldn't go to their "wedding." 

It's one thing to JOP it and have a vow renewal later.  It's an entirely different animal to lie to everyone about it.

You can invite them to yours but since they think their marriage is still a secret I'd address it to Ms. Douche Maidenname and Mr. Douche Lastname.  They want to be secretly married, they can deal with people thinking they're not yet.

squirrly

You should call and ask her what name she prefers for social mail.  And use that.