Wedding Etiquette Forum

Who attends the bridal shower?

I know this should just be common sense, but I kind of have a unique situation here.

My womens ministry at my parents' church hosts bridal showers for just about every woman who's attended the church. It's planned by the woman who's in charge of the womens ministry (who I know personally) and announced in the church bulletin, and typically about 45-60 women attend these showers.

But my mom wants to throw me another shower with her friends and family and I'm also inviting my FMIL and my FSIL. Are my future groom's other female guests invited as well? How does this work?
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Re: Who attends the bridal shower?

  • Yes, you can very well have 2 showers. Many brides have more than one. The rule is that anyone who is invited to the showers also must receive a wedding invitation.
  • But is any female guest of the groom that's invited to the wedding also invited to the shower?
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  • jess9802jess9802 member
    Knottie Warrior 500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited October 2010
    No, female guests at the wedding (from either side) do not have to be invited to the shower.

    The guests at my best friend's bridal shower included her bridesmaids, her mother, her grandmothers, her aunts and cousins, her FMIL, the groom's sisters, and the groom's sister-in-law.
  • I would argue against inviting guests that only know him and not you just because they're female. I know I wouldn't want to be invited to a bridal shower where I didn't actually know the bride. Is that what you were asking about?
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  • Artbyallie, that is what I was talking about. I haven't been to many bridal showers in the past outside of the ones thrown by the women from my parents' church as I said originally. I was just confused about who is supposed to be invited to the showers. Thanks for offering your insight. =)
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_attends-bridal-shower?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:2472711d-aae0-4ba5-b4ea-bd42cf18e02aPost:f4ddb3b5-0823-4831-978b-74575b2335d2">Re: Who attends the bridal shower?</a>:
    [QUOTE] The rule is that anyone who is invited to the showers also must receive a wedding invitation.
    Posted by MissySue20[/QUOTE]

    I am one who thinks this rule is flexible when it comes to church and work bridal showers.  I mean, 45-50 women might show up to this church bridal shower because it was posted in a bulliten you have no control over.  That is a large number of extra guests to accommodate-even if some of the women who are coming to the church shower are/will be invited to the wedding.

    As to your original question-only invite guests of the groom if you know them personally. Usually you would want to invite the groom's mom, any sisters, and his grandmothers.  Possibly aunts and cousins depending on your relationship and the size of the shower.
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