Tension between venue coordinator and my wedding planner

camera11

Our wedding is in  a little over a month, and yesterday I had a meeting at our venue to finalize the layout and timeline. Attendees were my wedding planner, my mom and I, and the venue event coordinator. I have worked with the venue coordinator and my planner seperately, and we have all communicated via e-mail and phone together, but this was the first face to face meeting between the venue coordinator and my planner.

They were both professional, but they didn't agree on many different aspects of our layout and timeline, to the point that there was some tension. They had differing opinions on our event timeline, vendor meals, table placement, just to name a few specifics.

Has anyone else dealt with this? If there are two opinions on something, whose would you choose - the person who knows the venue well or the person who knows you and your fiance well, and who you hired because you trust their judgement?

Thanks!

hlq2011

I haven't dealt with this, and I don't have a wedding planner.  But I think I would choose the opinion that made the most sense to me.  Ask for details - if they're disagreeing on layout, ask the venue coordinator where people will be coming from, and see what makes sense logistically.

If you're talking about timeline, I can't see where knowing the venue makes much difference, to be honest, so on that I'd probably go with the coordinator.

Think for yourself.  Not trying to be snarky, but this is one thing where "It's your day" applies (in my mind).  Take advice, but if you don't want to follow your first dance with your dance with your dad, that's up to you.

baystateapple

Both of them are working for you.  They should set their opinions aside and listen to what YOU and your FI want for your wedding.  I would listen to both of their arguments and pick the one that makes the most sense to you.  For example, our DJ told us that we should have our first dance after dinner.  But H didn't want to wait that long, it made him nervous and he wanted to "get it over with" as soon as we walked into the reception hall.  So we did that instead.  You have to do what makes you both happiest.  And they should respect your opinions.

LisaChris2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_tension-between-venue-coordinator-wedding-planner?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:254fe6b0-8863-444a-bf1b-21af3c786edbPost:763a7fde-3275-47a4-901b-7c9bd831b229">Tension between venue coordinator and my wedding planner</a>:
[QUOTE]Our wedding is in  a little over a month, and yesterday I had a meeting at our venue to finalize the layout and timeline. Attendees were my wedding planner, my mom and I, and the venue event coordinator. I have worked with the venue coordinator and my planner seperately, and we have all communicated via e-mail and phone together, but this was the first face to face meeting between the venue coordinator and my planner. They were both professional, but they didn't agree on many different aspects of our layout and timeline, to the point that there was some tension. <strong>They had differing opinions on our event timeline, vendor meals, table placement, just to name a few specifics.</strong> Has anyone else dealt with this? If there are two opinions on something, whose would you choose - the person who knows the venue well or the person who knows you and your fiance well, and who you hired because you trust their judgement? Thanks!
Posted by camera11[/QUOTE]

When it comes to venue details, including table placement, I'd go with your venue coordinator. She has a better understanding of the flow at your venue.
Regarding meals, not sure why this would be a decision between the venue coordinator and your wedding planner.  But I agree with PP, make sure they listen to you and your opinions are not drowned by their tension/differences.

bellebride116

I would go with your wedding planner. I feel like in the end she knows you the best. She's working for YOU where your event coordinator is working for your VENUE and will have their best interest in heart, not yours. 

camera11

Thanks ladies for the advice.

Bellebride, I was wondering about that too. The venue coordinator's recommendations involved adding things like additional tables, additional appetizers, etc. all for increased cost.

Lisachris, we are having a buffet and the venue coordinator would prefer the vendors to go through the buffet line, while my planner recommended we give vendors their food on a plate instead of going through the buffet. I think it is a small detail and honestly I don't care either way, but both women seemed to have really strong opinions on it.