Not Appropriate Dress?

Sharpschruter22

I have a dress that is white from the bustline up with 3/4 length sleeves. From the bustline down to below the knee it is black. Is this inappropriate for me to wear as a guest at a wedding because of the amount of white or is that rule just for all white?

KellyBrian2013

Generally speaking, if you have to ask you probably shouldn't wear it. I personally wouldn't care if a guest wore what you are describing (I had a friend wear a pure white top with a silver sequined skirt at my wedding, and I thought she looked fantastic). However, given that a significant portion that might show in photos is white (and not patterned at all), I probably would err on the side of caution and find something else to wear.

Peledreamsofrain

It depends on the bride, to be honest. Most people avoid any white just to avoid potential melodrama. If you have a a sane bride, she won't even notice. If you have a crazy bridezilla, she'll hold it against you. Only you know the bride well enough to make the call.

Avion22

I agree that it's kind of on the edge. Any way you can add a cardigan or brightly colored scarf over the top so it's not just a big block of white?   

Personally, if someone had worn that to my wedding, I wouldn't have cared in the least.  

Cortney1982

To be on the safe side I would not wear it.  Even if the bride didn't care some people might talk. 

QueerFemme

Don't wear it if a huge section is white unless you pair it with a cardigan or shawl or something.

Summer2011Bride

I would say if you put on a colored cardigan, you would be fine. Or a colored scarf that covered up some of the white.

As a bride, I wouldn't care. Looking back at my photos, I noticed one girl wore a dress that had a small pattern but was largely white. Even now that I noticed it, I just don't give a rip. But like others have said, you just never know, and I would want to avoid being the "side eye" conversation of other guests.

RamonaFlowers

Ditto PPs, personally at my own wedding, I wouldn't have cared about the dress you're describing ... but as a guest, I'd also personally never wear it, just to be safe.

itzMS

A guest wore an ivory lace cocktail dress to my wedding. A wedding I was just in last weekend, a guest wore a dress similar to what you describe. I noticed in pictures especially, and it kind of made made me side-eye that person, but I don't have any reason why.
I would say if you have any other option, wear that instead.

Ali092011

It sounds like it's mostly another color, but because of where the white is on the dress, I wouldn't wear it. In pictures and when you're sitting at the dinner table, the dress may look completely white. I think I'd err on the safe side and wear something else.

Daizy106

Me personally, I would not wear a dress that had any white on it at all as a guest at the wedding. As a bride to be-i wouldn't care if someone wore a dress with a portion of it being white. However, people always talk, so there will be at least one person who will say something. If you have another dress to wear that doesn't have white wear it to avoid anyone give you a bad look

Sharpschruter22

Ali is right that it is mostly black. It's very low cut, so I add a black tank underneath to have a modesty cover. Both the black of the bottom part in the dress and the tank show in pics so its not all white. That said, I see your points. I don't really have another cocktail type dress that fits right now so I'm not sure what to do. Thank you for the advice!

unchatenfrance

Are you around the same age as the bride? At my wedding I had 4 little girls (hubby's cousins' children) in white dresses although they were not our flower girls (we just had MOH & BM), and then at the reception there were two teenage girls (sisters, friends of the family) who wore white summery cocktail dresses (they did not attend the ceremony). At our wedding of 90 people, I don't think anyone "confused" them for the 27-year-old bride in the tulle ball gown. It didn't matter to me, and I don't know if anybody else "talked" about them. If I were you, I would wear the dress and maybe add a scarf or cardigan, or some contemporary jewellery (ie. not something sparkly similar to what the bride would be wearing).

Oh and I just recalled, we had a woman in her 50s wear a dress that sounds just like the one you are describing. Again, I didn't care, and I doubt anyone side-eyed her.

lyndausvi

Sounds fine to me.

Then again I don't get the whole WOMEN can't have any white on their clothes at a wedding.  It just rubs me wrong.  It's so stupid rule women make up to be mean to other women.  You don't hear anyone complain that men are wearing clothes that look like the groom.

Sharpschruter22

Yes, we are the same age. We look nothing alike. I don't think a cardigan would look right with it because its a cocktail dress, but a wrap is a good idea. I do have a black one. I didn't think of that. I understand why the rule exists, but I highly doubt this bride would even notice, much less the guests at the wedding. My crowd tends to be clueless about etiquette in general. Thanks for the ideas!

harper0813

You can always send a quick picture text/email/Facebook message to the bride, asking if she minds. Honestly, I don't think that's a big deal - if it's 50% white or less, I'd say it's fine, as a bride-to-be and a frequent bridesmaid/personal attendant. But I'm sure the bride wouldn't mind and would probably appreciate you asking her opinion.

QueerFemme

Honestly, I didn't care if people wore outfits that had white IN them.  One person did show up in an all white, strapless sundress.  I side-eyed it, and I heard that there were QUITE a few people who talked shitttt directly to her face, so she wore her coat the rest of the day.

I am with one of the PPs, who said, if you are questioning it at all, wear something else.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

It sounds like the top part is solid white. I would not wear that.

pzavecz

Yeah I agree with others...if you are questioning it, probably best to just avoid it and find something else to wear instead.  But if you're just a guest and not going to be in a lot of pictures, it's probably not a huge deal since it's not like it's all white.  SIL wore an ivory dress to my wedding...it had some small floral print on it but it was mostly ivory.  My dress was ivory.  I side-eyed it because I knew she was going to be in pictures but it was whatever, I wasn't going to get up in arms on my wedding day.  The photographer even called her out on it, not in a mean way, but just pointed out that her dress color was too similar to mine so she had to be positioned away from me in family photos.  Yeah, didn't really make her look good and I think she was really embarrassed.

I would just find another dress if I were you...you don't want to be talked about.

Tally879

I would avoid it, I had a girl that wore a white cocktail dress to my wedding with a black stripe.  I didn't even notice it until I saw the pictures, and she kind of stands out.  I'm not mad, it's just one of things I saw it and thought "well that was a bad choice"