Wedding Etiquette Forum
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so, my GF asked me to do a reading at her wedding

I'm not a super shy person, we went to elementary school together... we have lots of the same friends.  No biggie right.  I just found out it's over 200 people.

Surprised


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Re: so, my GF asked me to do a reading at her wedding

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    eep. short or long reading?
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    Awww!  I had to do a reading for two weddings of friends.  Honestly, it's not so bad, just keep your eyes downcast.  You don't have to make eye contact with anyone since it's not a speech.  It goes by much faster than you think it will.  You'll be fine!
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    I don't know which reading yet.  Eeep. 

    I sometimes stutter when I get nervous, so let's hope I do okay.  I'll practice lots. 

    "It's shart week." -georgiabride
    "This post is seriously retarded." -Stackeye210
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    Miss
    Mrs & ZOMG we built a howse!
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    For some reason when I first read it I thought you said "it's over 200 pages."  I was like, WTF kind of reading is that?!

    But seriously, talk slow and keep your eyes on the paper.  When I get nervous I go into turbo-reading mode and people can't understand me. 

    If I feel like I have to look up at the audience, I pick something random to look at, rather than make eye contact.  Like an empty chair. 
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    I'm with Bay,dont make eye contact. Or imagine them in their underwear. j/k.

    I found deep breaths help to calm, and yes practice.
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    Find a point at the back of the church or venue and when you look up, look at that. Practice it a lot first and I am sure you will do a great job.
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    I've always wanted to give this advice and never had the opportunity:

    Just picture everyone in their underwear! Laughing

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    You'll be fine. Just read through it several times. The better you know the words, the more comfortable you'll be.
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    Haha, thanks everyone! 

    "It's shart week." -georgiabride
    "This post is seriously retarded." -Stackeye210
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    Miss
    Mrs & ZOMG we built a howse!
    being healthy. blog.
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    Just practice and take a lot of deep breaths.

    Remember, you aren't being graded and most people won't know who you are. They'll be so focused on the couple and the day that even if you do goof a little I doubt it will make an impact or give a negative impression.
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    Yeah, that's a good point katie.  Very good point.  And I don't embarrass easily.  So even if I stumble on my words I could laugh it off quite easily. 

    "It's shart week." -georgiabride
    "This post is seriously retarded." -Stackeye210
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    Miss
    Mrs & ZOMG we built a howse!
    being healthy. blog.
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    salt78salt78 member
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    I'd probably cry. I SUCK at speaking in front of people. 
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    skippylouwhoskippylouwho member
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    edited July 2010
    Speaking in front of any size group does not bother me - at all. Singing does and I have a trained voice. I had to give up performingand accompanying other people because I stress out too much over it but speaking is no problem at all for me.

    I think part of it might be the reaction I get when I sing - I don't hear how my voice sounds and my speaking voice and singing voice must be very different. When people hear me sing they are usually - honest - just shocked. I've had friends standing near me when we sing the National Anthem (which I now tend to sing VERY quietly so I dont' get this reaction) stop singing, turn and stare at me with their mouths open.  And yet I truly dont' hear what it is that they all hear.   I play and sing for myself, only now.

    I'm pretty sure I'm not the second coming of Barbara Striesand but from the reaction, I have a very good voice.
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    Deep breaths and you'll do great!

    My money is on 1 Corinthians 13 Laughing
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    I always look at people's foreheads.  I avoid eye contact but it looks like I am making eye to eye from their position   (for the most part)
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    I had to make a speech at my sisters wedding, and she had maybe around 120 people.  I am super shy and hate public speaking so I stressed about it for weeks.

    I just practiced it A LOT, tried not to make eye contact with anyone and had the speech written on paper so I could read it easily.

    I cried and had to stop talking for a few seconds and I was mortified, but everyone told me it was great.  After it was done, I felt a lot of relief and was able to just enjoy the party.

    You'll get through it - if I could anyone can!
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    I keep getting asked to SING at friend's weddings. I'm a trained soprano, and I know by me doing it I'm saving them some money and also it means more to them. I do get stage fright- and it's kind of hilarious- when I used to sing for large crowds the first number was always a literal knee-knocker, and then I'd be fine. At weddings it's only the one song, mostly.

    Best ones have been when they've asked me to bust out an Ave Maria when I arrive at the church because planned soprano got sick or didn't show- in that case, it's easier because the nerves haven't built yet.

    If you're up there and nervous, look at your friend and her husband, and notice where a few friends are located, in case you need some re-assuring eye-contact. You'll be FINE!! :)
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    Try reading it to the couple, or if it's a reading that would be talking about the couple in third person, read it to their parents.  You're not reading it to the whole group, you're reading it for them.  So only focus on the people to whom you are reading it.  It will help.

    The "underwear" suggestion never helped me - I acted most of my life, and originally stage fright was nearly paralyzing.  Now, it really wouldn't matter what you asked me to read (or memorize to perform) in front of however many people.  Just pick one person or two, and make it for them.  In the case of a wedding, I think it's very easy to direct the entire reading to the couple (if it's about love and what it means) or to their parents (if it's referring to the couple in third person).
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