Wedding Etiquette Forum
Options

House party

What exactly is a house party?  What are their roles?

Re: House party

  • Options
    like  a frat or soroity party?
    The Bee Hive Est. June 30, 2007
    "So I sing a song of love, Julia"
    06.10.10

    BFAR:We Defined Our Own Success!
    image

  • Options
    Google says:

    This is a group of women whom you are close with and would liked to have asked to be in the wedding party. These women can still play contributing roles in your wedding without feeling left out or their feelings hurt. Here’s how it goes: the house party you select will help the maid of honor plan and execute the bridal shower, as well as the hen night. This is another phrase for the bachelorette party. The house party can be quite handy, as they can run errands for the maid of honor or the bride directly making for a much-needed relief in the stress department.

    It sounds like a cop-out to me. "I didn't want to make you a BM but I still want to make you do stuff for me." OP, I don't think I would recommend doing this.
  • Options
    I have never heard of this.  When I saw "house party" my mind jumped to my sister and her friends partying down at my apartment last New Year's.  I wouldn't equate "house party" with weddings.

    Also, if AK's description is accurate, it does sound like a cop-out.
    image

    Books read in 2012: 21/50

    AlternaTickers - Cool, free Web tickers

  • Options

    Am I the only one old enough to have thought immediately of Kid n Play?  

     

     

    I thought so.  

  • Options
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_house-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:30aa8984-7cc7-4bb9-be2d-0becb435b48dPost:bece57cd-f8c5-488a-a724-d8ee0cad5a51">Re: House party</a>:
    [QUOTE]Am I the only one old enough to have thought immediately of Kid n Play?       I thought so.  
    Posted by ohwhynot[/QUOTE]


    Oh, no.  You're not alone.
    The Bee Hive Est. June 30, 2007
    "So I sing a song of love, Julia"
    06.10.10

    BFAR:We Defined Our Own Success!
    image

  • Options
    Haha I was definitely thinking back to my college days and walking around campus to all the different house parties. 

    That definition AK found though is ridiculous.  I don't think enough of you to make you a BM, but I want you to spend all this money planning parties for me and being a slave for my MOH. 
    imageBabyFruit Ticker
  • Options
    House party is fairly common where I'm getting married (TX).  I

    The description from google is not accurate at all.  I would describe it as the female equivalent of ushers.  Last year I was in a house party and it was so nice to not have to buy a matching dress and it was similar to being a reader, just an honor role at the wedding.  I was not asked to plan or pay for anything out of the ordinary, just there to support the bride.  We (the house party) were the last ones to see her just before she walked down the aisle with her dad, made sure her tears were wiped off and her train was perfect just before the walk down the aisle. Other than that, all we did was welcome everyone in, ask them to sign the guest book and hand out programs at the church. 

    My house party is a friend that will be eight and a half months pregnant at the wedding and another friend who is making our grooms cake as her gift to us.  I still wanted to honor them even though the one friend was not comfortable with standing in front of everyone and the other will have lots of time constraints that weekend baking a huge cake.  I have similar gifts for them that I have for my bridesmaids and they were invited to the shower and my bachelorette party but have not been made to do any planning or any chores for the bridesmaids or myself.

    Here in Chicago, it's not common and would probably throw people off but in our circle it's totally accepted.  It doesn't insult me to be in the house party at all, it's essentially the same as standing in a line of 15 bridesmaids only you don't have to worry about the dress. 
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • Options
    I hadn't heard of that term before, but have certainly seen the same roles as jenb mentioned.  My best friend and her husband sort of took that position at my sister's wedding without a title.  
    My sister didn't have many friends.  She had wanted my best friend to be a bridesmaid for her, but they don't really know each other that well and I didn't like her trying to "steal" my friend.  Instead my friend and her husband were a great help to me as I was doing all the decorations and coordinating everything.  They came to the rehearsal so they would know the plan.  They mostly helped me be in more places at once.  They greeted the guests and explained to guest that my sister wanted rose petals tossed when they were walking back up the aisle.  None of the guests were used to that.
    They were the biggest help when the venue was an hour late in setting up the tables and the photographer was an hour early.  I got started setting the intricate centerpieces and they were able to finish so I could run upstairs to tell the photographer to wait and help my sister get dressed.
    They were not gifted the same way the wedding party was at the rehearsal dinner, but my parents sent them an incredibly generous gift a few weeks later with a note thanking them for everything they did.
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic
  • Options
    I'm pretty sure my BMs don't have enough to do to need any help or errand-runners.
    my read shelf:
    Meredith's book recommendations, liked quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)
    40/112

    Photobucket
  • Options
    This almost sounds like a "personal attendant" role.  I personally think they're also sort of a cop-out role for friends that weren't important enough to be bridesmaids but you still need someone to do all the little things.

    Now that I think about it, it's not exactly the most ridiculous concept.  I mean it would be kind of nice to have someone to, like you said, wipe your tears, fluff you, and what not at the back of the processional since you'll be solo at this point with everyone else already processed (word choice?? lol).  I'm not sure if I have someone that I would feel comfortable asking to do that for mine personally but if you have someone that you know wouldn't see it as a cop-out then I'd say that's a pretty nice thing to have and sort of comes with important jobs!  Whatever you want I say!
  • Options
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_house-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:30aa8984-7cc7-4bb9-be2d-0becb435b48dPost:c1f94182-fe46-4285-a784-8932250629e4">Re: House party</a>:
    [QUOTE]I have never heard of this.  When I saw "house party" my mind jumped to my sister and her friends partying down at my apartment last New Year's.  <strong>I wouldn't equate "house party" with weddings. Also, if AK's description is accurate, it does sound like a cop-out.</strong>
    Posted by baystateapple[/QUOTE]

    I agree.
  • Options
    BukiaBukia member
    First Comment
    Thanks for breaking it down, Jenb.  I myself am getting married in Texas and really wish I would have asked my three closest girlfriends to be my bridesmaids, but I didn't want to hurt anyone else's feelings that I didn't ask and I still wanted some family members to be a part of it.  My wedding isn't really big and I only wanted 3 bridesmaids. So I asked three of my relatives, but I still want my girlfriends to be close by my side on the wedding day.  Your explanation helped a lot! Thanks.
  • Options
    I have also heard this called the "Host Party," and I am doing it because I have a lot of sisters. Also, since I am thirty and have made several new close friends since college, I want to include some of my newer friends and wives of my fiancee's groomsmen. I want them to be a part of our special day because they are important to me as well. I have had plenty of friends do this and it was quite successful!
  • Options
    edited April 2013
    I'm considering having a house party because I have 5 good friends but do not want 10 extra people up on the alter in a small chapel. My fiance and I only want his best man and my MOH, who is my sister, to be standing up with us. So I think a nice way to include the other 4 could be in house party; in our wedding they would be treated as bridesmaids minus the matching dress and honored as such by getting to walk down and sit with family members during the ceremony. I'm not the kind of bride to delegate tasks so none of the girls will be "errand runners". In my case I think my friends would be hurt to not be in the wedding at all.
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards