I need some good advice ladies. I have a stepsister, we are the same age. She got married June 2010 and my wedding is fast approaching, October 16th 2011. She took a very backseat approach to her own wedding details and had my mom and her dad plan and pay for everything! She did not ask me to be a bridesmaid, in fact her biological sister was her only attendant. However, she did ask me to be the gopher on her wedding day, driving her to hair/makeup appts and getting her to the venue on time. I had 30 minutes to get myself ready for her big day which I did not mind, I just wanted to make the day special for her.
Now comes the planning for my wedding---over the last 9 months she has asked me SIX times now, who my bridesmaids are. I have told her every time and she always has something snarky to say, like "Oh I have no idea who that is" She has text harrassed me asking if she "is still coming to my wedding?" more than 5 times as well. I have told her that I want her to be there and have never made any comment otherwise. I told her that I realized that her feelings were hurt that I did not ask her to be a bridesmaid. I said that I wanted to ask my girlfriends only, because I did not want to cause any issues with the rest of my family (cousins who I was a bridesmaid for). She told me that she actually had no interest in being one. OK?!? She just didnt know who these other girls were. I said they are the girls that have been there for me for the past 5+ years for every birthday and major event. It is really starting to stress me out. She also had to the audacity to ask if her biological aunt and uncle from the other side of her family can come. I had to say no, because my FH and I are footing the entire bill for everything!! She knows that we are on a VERY tight budget and guest list. Is she trying to get under my skin?!?!? Or does she just not know that she is being rude?
Now, comes the worst part, she txted me one night to ask what my colors were, even though I had already told her that all the females are wearing dark purple. I wasnt able to respond to her mssg til the next day and she informed me that she had already bought 2 dresses and asked which one I would like more. I told her to send me pic mssgs of the 2 dresses and I would tell her my opinion. To my horror, she sends the pics and both are ALL white, one short and frilly, the other long and fitted. I had to bite my tongue until I could write her back and tell her that it is bad luck to wear all white to a wedding (didnt wanna tell her that it is an obvious disrespect toward the bride) She was pissed and told me that "well she had already bought them, what did I expect her to do?" MY mom and FMIL told me to let her embarass herself on the day of, but I know that it is really going to bother me if she shows up in all white. WHAT DO I DO??!?
Our relationship has not always been the best, but I feel that I really tried to be a good confidant during her wedding time. I am distressed that she is being so stubborn and hard to please on MY DAY. I caused no ripples for her on hers and was only there to support and make her happy. This is the only snag/stress that I have encountered in my year of planning. Please someone give me some wholesome, classy advice to deal with this sister-zilla!!