Wedding Etiquette Forum

Bachelor Party guests

My FBIL is planning to throw a bachelor party for FI. He is asking about the guys that should be invited and it is getting a little sticky.

FI is a volunteer on 2 fire departments and a rescue squad. He has formed friendships with lots of guys on each dept/squad- but in a social 'lets go grab a drink after the weekly meeting' type of way. The guest list is tight due to our large families, so we decided not to invite these friend since he only really hangs out with them at the firehouse/rescue squad building.

However, the guys would still like to partake in bachelor party festivities. I think the plan is paintball and whitewater rafting, so nothing crazy.

Would it be wrong to invite these guys along? I am aware that no one should be invited to pre-wedding parties if they are not invited to the wedding. I kind of see this as being equivalent to a work bridal shower that is held even when no or few people from work are invited, but I could see it being taken the wrong way as well.

FI would like these guys to be there, but he also understodd when I explained about the pre-wedding party rule.

Any advice would be wonderful. Thanks!

Re: Bachelor Party guests

  • Only people invited to the wedding should be invited to any pre-wedding parties including B-parties.
    Proud to be an old married hag!! image
  • Can everyone just have a paint-balling playdate without its being the bachelor party?
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_bachelor-party-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:33dc810e-a992-4357-94e1-765f0f5921f0Post:6f1489fe-4fd9-4f0c-925b-21f38f564755">Re: Bachelor Party guests</a>:
    [QUOTE]Can everyone just have a paint-balling playdate without its being the bachelor party?
    Posted by aurianna[/QUOTE]

    Absolutely. Would that make it ok if there was no wedding/bachelor party-related anything, just a bunch of guys going to play paintball for the day? The groomsmen are my FBIL and my Brother, so they would go anyway even if it wasn't wedding-related.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_bachelor-party-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:33dc810e-a992-4357-94e1-765f0f5921f0Post:ee920991-3b6e-4868-a076-cffc02c0d574">Re: Bachelor Party guests</a>:
    [QUOTE]The post immediately before yours asks the same exact question. Only people invited to the wedding should be invited to pre-wedding parties. If all the boys want to do something together they can, it just shouldn't be wedding related.
    Posted by Liatris2010[/QUOTE]

    I read the other post immediately after I posted mine. I felt like such a jerk. Sorry...
  • My FI is having 3 guys not invited to the wedding coming to his bachelor party. I let him know it's against etiquette, but he said none of them give a huey because they just want to go to Vegas. This is probably of no help to you, but sometimes guys just don't care about etiquette. But- do I think they should be invited? No, because it is rude. If they invite themselves along and don't care- that is probably a different story.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_bachelor-party-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:33dc810e-a992-4357-94e1-765f0f5921f0Post:5fda9680-6292-4b5d-af95-fe9f56d92dca">Re: Bachelor Party guests</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Bachelor Party guests : Absolutely. Would that make it ok if there was no wedding/bachelor party-related anything, just a bunch of guys going to play paintball for the day?
    Posted by krichards0527[/QUOTE]

    <div>Of course it's ok. That would be no different than if he were doing that a year ago or a year from now. It's just a day of guys doing something they enjoy together. </div>
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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