Catering dilemma: number of course, number of choices.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

So I just talked to my venue, and they said if I select 2 (or more) entrees, I'll have to get a count beforehand. I don't want to do this. For two reasons. 1) it's likely all the entrees will be vegetarian (or one veg and one sustainable fish) and I don't want to hear my dad biitch about it and 2) I don't want to schedule a tasting right now. I need to order my invitations soon because they're going to the calligrapher in June, and I don't need to add another item to my to-do list right now.

We're having 4 passed apps during cocktail hour, plus a 3 course dinner, plus cake later on. In a way I think this might be okay. Because we'll have a bunch of dishes, all of which happen to be vegetarian, and maybe people won't notice. (Sorry, if we do one option, it's going to be all veg so that I and the other vegetarians can actually eat it.)

We'll likely do a salad, then a risotto or pasta, then dessert. I'm thinking about maybe adding a soup course in as well, though, if that will fill people up more?

TIA.

jajph1974

I would add the soup. I think more options for guests is always the way to go.

I can't imagine adding a soup would cost that much more. Something like a broccoli cheese soup would also be very filling.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

They have a butternut squash soup that looks good. I'm not sure everyone likes squash, but it seems very fall-like. Supposedly the risotto is their house specialty, too, and uses seasonal vegetables.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

FYI, this is the menu I'm thinking:

Passed apps:

Grilled margarita thin crust mini pizza
Crispy potato ravioli with smoked spicy tomato sauce
Brie and apple quesadillas with mango salsa and chipotle sour cream
roasted eggplant stuffed piquillo peppers with feta and toasted almonds


Dinner:

Tomato and bufalo mozzarella salad

Spiced butternut squash soup with roasted pumpkin seeds, creme fraiche and pumpkin oil

Creamy wild mushroom risotto with parmesan cheese and seasonal vegetables

pumpkin marscapone cheesecake with pecan crust OR
hazelnut and fig tart with hazelnut gelato (not sure yet)

Our wedding cake is going to be both "blackberries and cream" with cream cheese frosting and something that alternates layers of white and chocolate cake with hazelnut mousse.

MyNameIsNot

I voted add the soup, but only if you can afford it.  I wouldn't say it's totally necessary.  

tlv204

Those appetizers sound delicious.

jajph1974

Ok. That menu sounds amazing.

I'd go with the pumpkin marscapone cheesecake. I'm not a fan of figs, so I'm biased.

laboheme68

Those options sound so delicious.

Agree with Mynameisnot....only get the soup if you can afford it it's necessary (but would be a delicious option).

tenofcups4me

I probably wouldn't do the soup and I don't think it's necessary to offer options. But I'd consider a pasta or something like an eggplant parmesan instead of the risotto as a main course. I like risotto but without any kind of meat or seafood, it feels more to me like a side dish than an entreee. I'm totally FOR having a vegetarian entree if you're vegetarian, but I'm just  not sure a meatless risotto is the best way to go.

The rest of the menu sounds wonderful!

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_catering-dilemma-number-of-course-number-of-choices?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:340a65b9-6620-4938-962e-ba933f0c7d5cPost:072d42b2-0c6a-4bc0-bc8a-7af497c077c0">Re: Catering dilemma: number of course, number of choices.</a>:
[QUOTE]Ok. That menu sounds amazing. I'd go with the pumpkin marscapone cheesecake. I'm not a fan of figs, so I'm biased.
Posted by jajph1974[/QUOTE]

I think you're right. Plus, with the hazelnuts in the cake I don't want to repeat an ingredient, especially if people hate nuts.

I thought maybe if I did the squash soup and pumpkin cheesecake it might be too gourd-heavy, but I might not even do the soup, so we'll see.

Nebb

I expect to see my invitation in the mail shortly. That looks delicious.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

Thank makes sense, Ten. My mom even said something like, "mushroom risotto seems more like a side dish." The menu at the club we're having the reception is semi-Italian like (obviously), but sort of upscale and modern, so I'll take another glace at their pasta options.

And thanks, I'm excited about the menu. I passed up some venues because their food sounded terrible (and at some I already knew it was terrible). FI and I are foodies. I'm a little worried about my lack of 129,233 options for cocktail hour like I see in some bios (maybe I should add a cheese display?) but I know we'll have enough food, even if it isn't a ton of options.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_catering-dilemma-number-of-course-number-of-choices?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:340a65b9-6620-4938-962e-ba933f0c7d5cPost:85998c06-9804-4646-b3d0-fde7ecba98a7">Re: Catering dilemma: number of course, number of choices.</a>:
[QUOTE]I expect to see my invitation in the mail shortly. That looks delicious.
Posted by Nebb[/QUOTE]

If I were getting married in Buffalo, it really WOULD be easy for you to come. Damn! I think I need to make a few phone calls... But then I'd have to invite my dad's 1.5 million cousins, too. They'd expect it.<img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-undecided.gif" border="0" alt="Undecided" title="Undecided" />

scoetto

The menu does sound good! FWIW we didn't do a tasting (we didn't have time) and the food turned out amazing!

Question though, I know you're vegetarian (my sister is too) but is it OK to NOT offer any meat options? Etiquette-wise? Not starting anything, just honestly curious since the circumstances are actually flipped.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_catering-dilemma-number-of-course-number-of-choices?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:340a65b9-6620-4938-962e-ba933f0c7d5cPost:4b3e436d-1805-415e-b218-2caa8076e453">Re: Catering dilemma: number of course, number of choices.</a>:
[QUOTE]The menu does sound good! FWIW we didn't do a tasting (we didn't have time) and the food turned out amazing! Question though, I know you're vegetarian (my sister is too) but is it OK to NOT offer any meat options? Etiquette-wise? Not starting anything, just honestly curious since the circumstances are actually flipped.
Posted by scoetto[/QUOTE]

I think <em>etiquette-wise</em> it's fine, since I'm offering enough food for everyone. I'll aslo accomodate dietary restrictions if people let me know. And technically, omnivores CAN eat vegetarian food, but not vice verse, you know?

FWIW, my FI isn't a vegetarian, but I cook vegetarian meals at home. (I gave him the option of cooking meat, but he wants our house to be "meat free" and eats whatever I make.) He also REALLY wants this to be e vegetarian reception. I did offer to do a fish option, because basically, we're paying for it ourselves and I'm morally comfortable putting my money towards that kind of food. (If my parents were paying, my choices might be different.) Not trying to force my choices on anyone. I'm actually trying to keep the "vegetarian wedding" theme to a minimum. Like, hey, these are just some good dishes so... try them. I'm not donating to PETA in lieu of favors or anything! Also, I DO want to be able to eat what I serve at my own wedding. And at least 4 of my guests are vegetarian, including 2 of my BMs, and 5 keep kosher, which this will accomodate.

Also, when people come to my house, I cook vegetarian food. Normal things, like cheese enchiladas or penne with pesto and sundried tomatoes. Not tofu over bean sprouts. :-) My friends usually like my food, or so I'm told.

tlv204

Serious question: Are there any actual carnivorous humans? I mean there has to be one somewhere in the world, right? There are all kinds of whackos.

mica178

instead of the soup, what about an extra passed appetizer and/or cheese/vegetable display?  i sort of feel that the soup course is just going to emphasize the vegetarian-ness of the meal.  not that that's a bad thing, other than in your dad's case (i think?).

i'm not giving my guests a choice either.  too much of a pain.  i feel better about things because i'm having so many appetizers that many won't feel too hungry by the time the seated meal comes around.

p.s. awesome menu.  even carnivores like me wouldn't miss the meat.

mandybear7

just a question- Why do the invites need to go to the calligrapher? We just sent the envelopes.

quotequeen

I would vote for a choice because I personally don't like risotto.  Oh well.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_catering-dilemma-number-of-course-number-of-choices?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:340a65b9-6620-4938-962e-ba933f0c7d5cPost:88fc558b-ec39-4703-8796-6b1d33e3530b">Re: Catering dilemma: number of course, number of choices.</a>:
[QUOTE]instead of the soup, what about an extra passed appetizer and/or cheese/vegetable display?  i sort of feel that the soup course is just going to emphasize the vegetarian-ness of the meal.  not that that's a bad thing, other than in your dad's case (i think?). i'm not giving my guests a choice either.  too much of a pain.  i feel better about things because i'm having so many appetizers that many won't feel too hungry by the time the seated meal comes around. p.s. awesome menu.  even carnivores like me wouldn't miss the meat.
Posted by mica178[/QUOTE]

Maybe I'll have them price out a soup and a cheese display and see which works out.

My dad is just very meat and potatoes. So is my step father. My dad is getting better. He's cooked a vegetarian and regular lasagna for Christmas Eve every year for the last 15 years or so. He'll eat things like plain pizza or plain spaghetti. But it would be hard to convince him to eat a vegetarian restaurant without some huge eyerolling, you know?

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_catering-dilemma-number-of-course-number-of-choices?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:340a65b9-6620-4938-962e-ba933f0c7d5cPost:c44657bc-04a2-4c9d-b63b-976588973d25">Re: Catering dilemma: number of course, number of choices.</a>:
[QUOTE]just a question- Why do the invites need to go to the calligrapher? We just sent the envelopes.
Posted by mandybear7[/QUOTE]

Yeah, just the envelopes, but I have to order them before they get sent so everything comes in together, including the evelopes. I'm not DIYing, I'm ordering through MyGatsby. The calligrapher I'm using has me booked for the last week of June. I figure I'll get them back the first week of July, stuff them, and mail them the first week of August for an October wedding. But I want to Fed Ex the envelopes to her the first week or so of June (she's out of state).

danieliza1127

Your appetizers sound awesome, the rest sounds kind of blah to me even though I love risotto.  I just can't imagine that being the main course.  But that's not your question.  I would add the soup.  I would expect that your meat lovers are going to notice and complain about the dinner, but probably not to you directly (hopefully!).

Nebb

I think if any meat eaters could find something to complain about in that menu, they are just naturally nitpickers and probably would have complained even if there WAS meat. I think the menu is well rounded and looks like the flavours are bold enough that it will be interesting and filling. Most likely, unless everything says MEATLESS, they wont notice until after the fact.

mica178

how about having an extra passed appetizer/display that has some meat/fish?  true, you wouldn't eat it, but your dad might appreciate it.  just a silly, carnivorous thought.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_catering-dilemma-number-of-course-number-of-choices?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:340a65b9-6620-4938-962e-ba933f0c7d5cPost:88973ba3-a2de-4617-a9cb-602d96554710">Re: Catering dilemma: number of course, number of choices.</a>:
[QUOTE]I think if any meat eaters could find something to complain about in that menu, they are just naturally nitpickers and probably would have complained even if there WAS meat. I think the menu is well rounded and looks like the flavours are bold enough that it will be interesting and filling. Most likely, unless everything says MEATLESS, they wont notice until after the fact.
Posted by Nebb[/QUOTE]

<a rel="nofollow" href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_food-cakes_aw-wedding-menu">http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_food-cakes_aw-wedding-menu</a>

That's how I felt when I read one comment on the post I linked here. This girl has like 5 main courses and one girl says, "the only thing I'd eat on your menu is rolls." Seriously? I mean, I could do beef wellington and chicken marsala and someone might hate both puff pastry and mushrooms.

Specific comment: <em>Hate to ask this - but what's the children's options? Personally the ONLY thing I would eat off that menu would be the scallop in bacon or the rolls - the rest of the stuff makes me wish for McDonald's before I arrive. I KNOW my god-children or my future step son would be more likely to use that food as ammunition than dinner. Has your caterer considered having at least one "SIMPLE" or "COMFORT" food at all for children or picky eaters? </em>

BUT I do realize this this is an unpopular choice and most of the board doesn't agree with me. I'm glad you'd eat my wedding food, though, Nebb!

I am sort of worried about being "that weird vegetarian wedding we went to" which is why I want to get the food right.

Nebb

I think people have this nasty assumption of what "vegetarian food" is, sprouts and tofu and crudite or something, even though as your menu proves vegetarian food can actually be really interesting. I totally dont think meat is necessary to eat an enjoyable meal.

msjd2010

I think your menu looks delicious!  I think pricing out an additional passed app versus the soup is a good idea.  I would probably prefer an app if the price is the same.

I love mushroom risotto, but there are a lot of people who hate mushrooms, so that might be something you want to take into consideration as well.  Perhaps there's an entree choice with a wider variety of veggies so people could pick around any vegetables they don't like?  

skippylouwho

I think your menu options sound really good and I'm not vegetarian although I do eat a lot of vegetables (just because I love vegetables).   I think the squash soup sounds wonderful, my husband makes some that is just fabulous.

Shawnee11507

Mmm. Your menu sounds good! I especially would love the Brie and apple quesadillas with mango salsa and chipotle sour cream. I would go with the Pumpkin Marscapone Cheesecake. Yummy!

I also think of Risotto as a side dish and I have a few friends that don't like mushrooms (I personally love them). If it were me, I would probably go with a pasta or meatless lasagna for a vegetarian dinner or an eggplant parmesan or rollatini if it wasn't already on your Apps list.

I'd go do a tasting for you if I lived in L.A. Darn.

lyndausvi

I like most of your apps.  (I can't say I've ever liked all the apps offered, so that is normal)  I also LOVE caprese salad.  It's actually one of my favorite salads.

 I would would basically pick at the rest of the menu because I'm polite like that, but I would not walk away being impressed either.  I do not generally eat soup, if I do it's pretty much chicken noodle. 

I'm not a nut fan so both the entrees I would basically pick at it or just ignore.  I'm also not to much of a pumpkin fan and you have 2 options that have pumpkin.  

I'm pretty indifferent to the risotto.

Basically I'm a meat and potato girl and would still crave some meat protein.