Announcing versus inviting

christinech85

How do I advertise my wedding news to [special] friends without actually inviting them to the wedding? The wedding is far away from most everyone anyway, so the chances that many of them will make it are slim, but I don't want to be surprised by a confirmation when I don't really want or expect them to attend, and can't afford them to attend anyway because it's a small wedding and the venues require an estimated list long before even the Save-the-Dates are sent out...But I still want to share the news with them in a way that they can remember and celebrate for us in their own way. I don't know how to go about this.

Simply Fated

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_announcing-versus-inviting?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:34402fdc-c306-42c7-863e-7f8a0af5b453Post:4426e99a-a8a4-4f0a-adf0-16df015d051a">Announcing versus inviting</a>:
[QUOTE]How do I advertise my wedding news to [special] friends without actually inviting them to the wedding? The wedding is far away from most everyone anyway, so the chances that many of them will make it are slim, but I don't want to be surprised by a confirmation when I don't really want or expect them to attend, and can't afford them to attend anyway because it's a small wedding and the venues require an estimated list long before even the Save-the-Dates are sent out...But I still want to share the news with them in a way that they can remember and celebrate for us in their own way. I don't know how to go about this.
Posted by christinech85[/QUOTE]
You would send the announcements out after you're married.

Honestly? I'm not a big fan of announcements, but that's just a personal preferences. You didn't ask about that, though, so I won't get into it.
But, anyway, yeah, after you're married you would send out announcements to everyone.

Avion22

It's impolite to tell people about a party to which they are not invited.  If people ask you for details, you can tell them that you are planning a small private ceremony.   But I wouldn't talk about more than that...

GardenMaven

I agree with PP's.  You do it after the wedding.  

I am not a big fan of announcements either, so when my parents asked if I wanted an engagement photo/announcement in the paper, I said no.  I don't want a wedding announcement either.  Like Simply Fated though, it is a personal preference. 

cwaggoner07

Can you just announce it in a local paper?

StephJean83

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_announcing-versus-inviting?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:34402fdc-c306-42c7-863e-7f8a0af5b453Post:f4fab58b-53f1-4800-85f9-8f028d0655a7">Re: Announcing versus inviting</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>Can you just announce it in a local paper?
</strong>Posted by cwaggoner07[/QUOTE]

This.

I know in the big Sunday paper where I live they have a whole celebrations section for weddings, engagements, big birthdays(or any really) and graduations. Some have pictures, some are just short blurps that give the general idea, like "Bride and Groom are getting married. Bride is 2000 graduate of local HS and 2004 graduate of OOS college. Groom is 1998 graduate of OOS HS and 2002 graduate of (same) OOS college. Bride is currently working as teacher in city and state. Groom is currently working as engineer in city and state. A June 2013 wedding is being planned in city." 

freebread03

I think it's strange that you want people to "celebrate for you in their own way"--do you expect that these people you are not inviting will be throwing parties or something for you even though they aren't invited, or what?

I think that you should take PPs on their suggestion of announcing in the local paper, and if you're really compelled, send wedding announcements AFTER the wedding.

TheShelley

Could someone please explain the objection to wedding announcements (after the fact)?  We are doing a second wedding next year (very small) and were planning on doing announcements after.  My family is very large, and hosting them all is just impossible.

But I would like to know, why don't some of you like announcements?  Thanks.