Should I invite OOT family to rehearsal dinner?

futuremrsgates

Most of my mother's family from rural Mississippi will be attending and staying in the hotel next door to our venue, Obviously my grandmother is invited, but should I include the aunts, uncles, cousins (total would be an additional 10 ppl) in our rehearsal dinner? Or should I ask my FMIL what she wants to do?

Jager1219

Who is hosting?  If it's the FMIL, then you need to talk to her and find out how many people she can host.  People who need to be there are the bridal party.  OOT guests are optional, but it is nice to have them since they are traveling all that way for the wedding.  You also don't need to do a RD if you don't do a rehearsal and you can always do something more casual if you would like to host more people on a budget.

lyndausvi

I would ask your mom.  But with I would be inclined to invite them.   I invite 140 to mine (entire guest list was OOT).  So I might be  little bias. 

ladytori

Since my FMIL hosted it, she was in charge of the guest list for the RD. My parents and the bridal party were invited with their significant others. And my FMIL extended invitations to the out of town guests.

Kate61487

definitely clear it with FMIL if she's hosting.  If it's in the budget I'd go ahead and include them.  Would FMIL want to include more of her family if you invite your OOT family?  Especially if she's hosting you want to consdier who in her family is included as well. 

AddieCake

We invited our OOT guests, but there were only 3 of those who were not already involved in the wedding. I think if you have the budget for it, it would be a nice gesture if you can invite those 10. 

cbrown828

I agree with checking with the host (if that is not you). I think these are all good ideas. 90% of our guests are out of town (our hometowns, not where we live now) so we are planning a casual rehearsal barbeque and spreading by word of mouth that everyone is welcome to drop by between 5 and 8 to eat and visit. We aren't doing actual invitations because we don't want people to feel as if they have to come (it's a 5 hour drive for some folks, they may want to travel without the pressure of an expected arrival time and relax in the hotel), but there are only 65 guests so we will make sure everyone hears about it. I think it's a very nice gesture to extend to those who are traveling a good distance to celebrate with you.

zantster

FILS are hosting and it will just be the bridal party and their families.  If we start inviting OOT family and friends from their side it would be awkward because I have family coming from OOT as well and the list would start to get very long very quickly.  I've been in WPs before as a BM and it was always casual with a rehearsal at the church and not always something to eat afterward.  It was only the WP each time though.  So to me this is already going further than I am accustomed to.  We'd love to do a BBQ or pizza but since it will be in the evening a couple days before and after a long day at work, we figured we'd want something a bit lighter and without the clean up responsibility so we're going to a restaurant.

NYCMercedes

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_should-i-invite-oot-family-to-rehearsal-dinner?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:388e832a-ad21-4d9a-a5d2-b2e2e20d8578Post:e34f4886-2b18-4e7a-bb27-65b8dc5f7d22">Should I invite OOT family to rehearsal dinner?</a>:
[QUOTE]Most of my mother's family from rural Mississippi will be attending and staying in the hotel next door to our venue, Obviously my grandmother is invited, but should I include the aunts, uncles, cousins (total would be an additional 10 ppl) in our rehearsal dinner? Or should I ask my FMIL what she wants to do?
Posted by futuremrsgates[/QUOTE]

If FMIL is the host, it is entirely her call. You may as her, however.