Shower invitation, wwyd?

Nebb

I just recieved an shower invitation in the mail today. Its for the girl whos wedding I was in and dropped out of, who hasnt said a single solitary word to me since I dropped out in january. I honestly dont know WHY im invited (it was sent by her sister, but she would have had to get my address from her). Its asking to rsvp to her sister, so obviously I should say im not coming.

Do I just say "no im not coming" "sorry I cant make it" "uh no freaking way wtf?!" (despite the fact that we havnt talked in nearly 2 months, I have no job so obviously cant afford to go to a gift giving event 3 hrs away)

I feel like an idiot even asking but I dont really know how to respond to this, im still in the "wtf did I get this for" phase.

shellydiane820

I would say "sorry I can't make it....wench".

ZoeTheDog

I got one of these, wasn't supposed to be in the wedding but when I told the bride-friend last year that I already had plans (family wedding), she stopped talking to me.  I therefore did not include her on my guest list, and I just politely declined the bachelorette party and bridal shower. 

If you don't want to talk to sister, use Sly Dial and just leave a voicemail! 

danieliza1127

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_shower-invitation-wwyd?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:3c8f9fa6-c2c8-47bd-ba01-12c026ade333Post:8f23252c-0123-4365-8a80-627b0a268ee8">Re: Shower invitation, wwyd?</a>:
[QUOTE] If you don't want to talk to sister, use Sly Dial and just leave a voicemail! 
Posted by ZoeTheDog[/QUOTE]

That's what I did last year!  Ha!  It worked great.  Just say you're calling to let her know that you won't be able to make it but you hope they have a great time.

AlexiaANDRobert

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_shower-invitation-wwyd?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:3c8f9fa6-c2c8-47bd-ba01-12c026ade333Post:37fd6edc-250d-463a-9531-a83124690bdc">Re: Shower invitation, wwyd?</a>:
[QUOTE]I would say "sorry I can't make it....wench".
Posted by shellydiane820[/QUOTE]

Yeah, I like this response too.

jasmineh7777

Regretfully decline.

Nebb

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_shower-invitation-wwyd?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:3c8f9fa6-c2c8-47bd-ba01-12c026ade333Post:37fd6edc-250d-463a-9531-a83124690bdc">Re: Shower invitation, wwyd?</a>:
[QUOTE]I would say "sorry I can't make it....wench".
Posted by shellydiane820[/QUOTE]
Thats what I WANT to say, but obviously cant. I know its probably not but I see it as a gift grab, inviting someone who obviously wont come and who she doesnt even talk to.

LisaTyler1984

I wouldn't even RSVP 

ac_in_dc

Yeah, I'd just decline.

Did you drop out of her wedding b/c of circumstances in your life or because she was being unreasonable?

Nebb

I dropped out for a number of reasons - She and her stupid sister were always brushing me off, I was offering to do stuff and they would never respond to me (email), it would be like 2 weeks between responses and I got really ticked off. We hardly talk, havnt spoken on the phone since the night she got engaged (dec 08) and havnt seen eachother since my wedding (july 08), and I didnt really think we were that close anymore. Ontop of that I am broke and have no idea when I might find a job so I cant really commit to any of the financial obligations of being in a wedding party (shower, bachparty, travelling 3 hours for fittings and other stuff). There had also been other issues stemming back to last spring that had been brushed under the carpet. So I dropped out, we never talk on the phone so I sent an email that literally took me 2 hours of editing to make sure it was "right", and she reponded that she needed time to absorb it before she responded to it and I havnt heard from her since, and I sent it the end of January.

kikibaby

I would just go the "No, I'm not coming" route. 

Although, do you think she sent it you as a peace offering or because she wants a gift? 

mandybear7

I would just RSVP no. You don't need to give an explanation. Plus, since she never responded to your email from January, you can show how adult you are and actually respond with an RSVP.

Were you thinking about attending the wedding?

georgia_bride09

My vote is for Sly Dial as well. That way, you don't have to actually talk to the sister and can get out of it and move on.

Just say, "Hey Sally, this is Nebb. I was just calling to say that unfortunately I won't be able to make Jane's shower. Thanks and have a blessed day."

Music and Lyrics

If you were ever in a situation
Without enough time for contemplation
All of your friends goin' the same way
You feel kinda trapped
You don't know what to say
Just say no