No kid reception

randyjomac

Ok i need some help. Were having a large wedding with alot of booze. Mainly a adult only reception. However....the siblings to the bride and groom ( his sisters and my brother) have small kids and those are the only ones were inviting. The only reason were invited them is because i would catch so much crap from family if i didnt. So there are other small kids in the family ( second cousins) that just assumed they were invited. How does one go about telling them.."sorry, but no kids are invited but the siblings kids" with sounding like a total jack ass. If i wasnt the last kid to get married this wouldnt be happening because now everyone has had their kids. When they all got married no one had kids so they didnt have to worry about it. Any thoughts...

brilibby4

Have you already sent out invitations?  If not then when you do you should address them only to those invited.  If someone adds their childrens' names to the RSVP cards then you or fiance call them up and say "I'm sorry but the invitation was only for ____ and ____.  We are sorry for the confusion.  Hope to see you there!"

MJheartsWeddings

You have awhile until your invites go out.. Make sure to only address the adults on your invitations.. If they try to add on the kids then I would probably tell them.. "Sorry, but we are only inviting nieces and nephews.  Due to budget/space we're really not able to accommodate any other children."

livnsamsmama

You can also put it on our wedding website, if you have one. FI and I have 3 children together (yes, we did this backwards), as well as a niece and nephew each. They will be there, but I (very nicely) mentioned on my website that kids are not invited. And like others suggested, will only address the invites to the adults. If anyone asks why, just say that the only way you could have all of the adults there you wanted, was to ask that the children stay home. That leaves it a bit ambiguous; could be because of cost, space, time, etc.

willywally5

I am a fan of the RSVP cards that say

X seats have been reserved in your honor

    ___ Accept

    ___ Decline

Then there really isn't a question. But if you've already ordered them, too late. Then be certain to address them as PP have suggested and make the necessary calls. 

ETA; Honestly, you don't need to explain why there isn't room for their little ones. A polite and simple,'I'm sorry for the confusion, but the invitation was only for ____ and _____. We hope to see you there." is sufficient. If they didn't get the drift from a properly addressed invitation, that's on them. 

pearlaqua

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_no-kid-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:3d597ddc-850e-401e-b689-f57b0a3481b6Post:a5f949bc-71f8-491a-923c-019c8dcc353b">Re: No kid reception</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>You can also put it on our wedding website</strong>, if you have one. FI and I have 3 children together (yes, we did this backwards), as well as a niece and nephew each. They will be there, but I (very nicely) mentioned on my website that kids are not invited. And like others suggested, will only address the invites to the adults.<strong> If anyone asks why, just say that the only way you could have all of the adults there you wanted, was to ask that the children stay home.</strong> That leaves it a bit ambiguous; could be because of cost, space, time, etc.
Posted by livnsamsmama[/QUOTE]

No need to explain with this because then guests will still feel like X person is more important to you than their kid.  I think putting it on the wedding website is rude. It's more polite to spread the word of only the couple's kids or siblings' kids are invited, that is a clear  and understanable line as opposed to "Your kid didn't out-favor this adult in our tabulations".

randyjomac

thank you all so much ladies!!

jenjlgsings

We are having an adult only reception as well.  The nieces and nephews and the kids of the best man are the only kids invited.  We've had some people ask and they understood when we mentoined that the only kids were family.