Wedding Etiquette Forum

Invitation for long, long lost relatives?

I recently found out that my father had a first marriage and he has another daughter. She is older and has her own family in GA (I live in PA). I had no idea she existed and have never met her or her family. Obviously she and my father did not keep in touch. Thanks to Facebook they kinda reconnected, though I do not think they have met up in person. My mother knows about her, but has not been in contact with her, ever. And to complicate things, my mother and father are separated (they are not really friendly with eachother at this point) already making family affairs difficult. I have never met her and I do not forsee a meeting with her before our wedding day.... I feel very uncomfortable inviting her my wedding, she is virtually a complete stranger and knows no one aside from my father, who she hasn't seen in at least 10 years.

Do I invite her and her family?  Frown

Re: Invitation for long, long lost relatives?

  • In a word, no.

    I have two adult stepbrothers that I do not know, but I did not invite them simply because they are my stepfather's sons.

    Now, perhaps someday you can connect with your half sister (if you want), but your wedding is not the time for that!
  • I don't think your wedding is the place for this reunion to take place. There will be plenty of emotions involved with this meeting and I think if you are interested in meeting her you should do it in private. If you are hoping for a relationship with her, plan the meeting in a few months and maybe if you keep in touch you will want to invite her to the wedding. But if you are not interested in a relationship and are just trying to invite her to be polite, I don't think you should invite her.
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  • I am squarely in the camp of "weddings are not family reunions," and I think when the potential reunion is this emotionally fraught, you are under no obligation to invite this sister. Also, if I were her, I don't think I'd be expexting an invitation, since you've never even met her. I do think you should make an effort to meet her in person and get to know her, but I don't think your wedding is necessarily the place to start that process.
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  • I see no reason why you would have to invite her. If you really WANTED to connect with her, you COULD invite her, but it is definitely not a must!
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  • I agree with the PP's.  If you want to establish a relationship with her, I don't think your wedding is the place to do it.  At this point, I would not invite her.
  • Heck, no.  Do not invite her.  A wedding is not the place for the initial meeting between you and your sister.  She doesn't even have a relationship with her father (I don't consider FB interactions relationships).  One step at a time.
  • Agree with PP's.  Wedding is not the time or the place for something private like this.
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