Wedding Etiquette Forum

Need help!

So after having a discussion this weekend, DF and I are thinking about scaling down the wedding a bit. We had originally budgeted for five grand, but we found a great apartment at a great price and decided to take it, so are savings have been depleted. So, my question is this: would it be wrong to not have bridesmaids even though I've already asked my cousin and future sister in law to be my 'maids?  

Re: Need help!

  • If you've already asked people to be bridesmaids then you should have them.

    The only way I'd say you can get out of that is if you scale back the wedding so far that they're not even on the guest list because you're only inviting your parents and siblings.
  • That's what I figured and I'm extremely close to both, so they would be there anyways.
  • NebbNebb member
    5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    How would not having bridesmaids save money?
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:4517d9cd-13e3-45d0-b4a4-1e2c527a0d64Post:71c06b7d-ac27-4891-a7fa-8600cf36a915">Re: Need help!</a>:
    [QUOTE]How would not having bridesmaids save money?
    Posted by Nebb[/QUOTE]

    This. I'm confused. If they are going to be there anyway it's not really saving you money.
    June 16, 2012
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:4517d9cd-13e3-45d0-b4a4-1e2c527a0d64Post:71c06b7d-ac27-4891-a7fa-8600cf36a915">Re: Need help!</a>:
    [QUOTE]How would not having bridesmaids save money?
    Posted by Nebb[/QUOTE]

    My guess is things like bouquets, gifts, and such, which for some weddings can be a lot of money.  If she doesn't have bridesmaids, she doesn't have to buy things for them.
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  • I don't understand how not having bridesmaids saves you money too.

    You can't really unask them, so like banana said, unless you scale back to immediate family only you have bridesmaids.
  • If your original budget was only five grand, how many people are you scaling back to? Have you looked into what local vendors cost? I am only asking because we are having 55 people, and its still costing about $6000 for everything, and thats considering we got major discounts for having a "winter wedding".  Bridesmaids usually pay for their own dresses and what not, so cutting them out wont change your budget. Good luck!
  • MiksChick23MiksChick23 member
    First Comment
    edited March 2012
    No, I think "unasking" is very inappropriate.

    Bouquets, required attire (except dress) and WP gifts are the only thing that might cost you a little extra money. Your BM don't have to wear matching dresses and shoes. Normally BM pay for their dresses and you only pay for shoes and hair if its a requirement. Dont'require it. Let them wear shoes they already have or you could ask them to wear a cocktail or sundress instead that they already own (they don't have to match!). As far as the gifts go, you don't need to spend $50 per person, get them something small, or make something. You don't need bouquets either, you could have they carry a single stem tied with a ribbon or search the web for alternative ideas.
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  • NebbNebb member
    5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited March 2012
    There are a lot of inexpensive alternatives to traditional bouquets. Thats not even a valid reason to consider cutting bridesmaids.
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