Wedding Etiquette Forum

help us decide what to do :)

So FI has sent me to the knot to help us make a decision and I thought you ladies might be able to help :)

So we're debating on where to stay the weekend of the wedding.  We're getting married outside at a winery in the mountains, about 2 hours away, fairly early on a Sunday, so we're staying over Sat & Sun night.  Some family and WP are staying the Sat night too so they can be at the RD & up there early on Sunday.

There's this beautiful historic inn nearby, it's expensive since it's a "resort" but the place is beautiful!  It's got this wrap around porch with rocking chairs that overlooks the river.  And the mountains are right there across the river.  We're getting married end of Sept so the leaves should be starting to change too.  It would be idealic for pictures!  And as far as having a wedding "vision" this is why we chose the mountains in the fall... but the rooms & bathrooms are small and a mic/fridge and/or breakfast is extra.  I'm going to obviously be spread out with lots of "stuff" getting ready ... possibly even having my hairdresser come to the room and a friend to help me do makeup at my room... so...

There's also nearby a regular hotel... we'd be saving about 150$ on the weekend and we could get a big suite room with a bedroom, living room, mic/fridge, breakfast all included.  this is also probably where most family/friends that are staying on Sat night would be staying too.

So ladies, your opinion... what's more important.  The scene/environment and having some gorgeoussss pictures OR having more room and space, saving a few bucks, and being closer to friends/fam?


Re: help us decide what to do :)

  • Can you stay at the cheap/big place the night b/4 so you can use it to get ready, then move to the other place for the wedding night? That's what I'd do.
  • no the inn is a 2 night stay only
  • Can you stay sunday and monday night?
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  • I say the bigger room, as wonderful as the other place may be you need the space. If you are anything like me you have grand plans of taking all these pictures and then never do, or it's raining, or the batteries die or what ever. I think you might have answered you own question with more space= less stress! You can always spend your one year anniversary at the inn. I was going to stay at a inn like that until I realized the amount of time I was acctually going to be spending there for the amount of money I was spending.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_decide-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:474a15ae-1094-4dea-acbc-291b5efe8f14Post:5e3ed1bf-c601-406e-b335-c080e13d00d8">Re: help us decide what to do :)</a>:
    [QUOTE]I say the bigger room, as wonderful as the other place may be you need the space. If you are anything like me you have grand plans of taking all these pictures and then never do, or it's raining, or the batteries die or what ever. I think you might have answered you own question with more space= less stress! You can always spend your one year anniversary at the inn. <strong>I was going to stay at a inn like that until I realized the amount of time I was acctually going to be spending there for the amount of money I was spending.</strong>
    Posted by efj.btw2011[/QUOTE]

    This is what I was thinking. How much time are you really going to be spending at this Inn if the venue is far away. I would honestly go with the suite and like a PP suggested stay at the Inn for an anniversary.
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  • Maybe your parents or someone want to stay at the more expensive place, which would then allow you to take pictures there?

    But I vote for staying at the large place Saturday, and the pretty place Sunday and Monday, if that's an option. 
  • You can't get pictures near the mountains if you don't stay in this particular hotel? Do they have rights to the tree leaves? :) 

    Stay where it fits in your budget and travel to get the pictures you want! Best of both worlds.
  • What if you stay Saturday into Sunday at the Inn, get ready, dressed, etc everything there, and then spend your wedding night at the resort?

    Who are you to judge the life I live? I know I'm not perfect and I don't live to be. But, before you start pointing fingers, make sure your hands are clean. -Bob Marley

  • alright, let see if i can add some details/answer some questions :)

    1. only staying sat/sun... another night not an option
    2. don't think there's anyone else who would stay at the inn so we could still take pics there (although good idea)
    3. that's the odd thing, there's tons of beautiful "scenes" of mountains... but not so many that we can just go... especially all dressed up... not looking to do a hike in my dress lol and some places are private property (like the hotel)... plus if it's more than just me and him, a pain to get everyone together and over there... the inn has not only the perfect scenery but the ease of just being there... and we're not from the area... so that'd be another trip up there to "scout" random areas for if they're good photo ops...i guess it's possible but we also need to decide already...
    4. i'm kinda indifferent on being around family/friends... i think it might be nice to be around them though... it'd be nice to be around the girls in the morning especially if we're all getting our hair done together and there will be some fam around i don't see much... but i think sitting on the porch just ourselves the night after a hectic day sounds nice too.

    livleighton - i would def be willing to pay them to just let me take pics there lol  i don't think it's an option though... i kind of hinted to this with them before and they didn't seem warm to it...


  • I think you'll be pleased you have the space at the more traditional hotel, since getting ready will probably be the bulk of the time that you're spending there.  The inn sounds beautiful, but I say save the $150 and stay somewhere nice on your honeymoon.
  • I say save the beautiful place for a weekend when you won't be stressing... maybe an anniversary getaway or something!
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  • noodle_oonoodle_oo member
    1000 Comments
    edited April 2011
    I'd go for the hotel for a bunch of reasons:

    1) everyone else will be staying there, it will be easier for everyone.

    2) the huge room is going to be VERY nice if you plan to have everyone get ready together.  Much more comfortable.  And it sounds like it has more amenities that you might need.

    3) you really won't spend much time in the room either the night before or your wedding night.  By the time the wedding is over, it will be really late, you'll barely get to use the room, so save the extra money.

    4) breakfast:  it might be nice to have breakfast at the hotel with your family and friends who are staying there.  We did breakfast in our huge hotel suite with our closest friends and it was really nice.

    5) the inn is not worth the extra cost given that you will barely have time to use it.  If all your family/friends are staying at the other hotel, it will be a pain to get them all to the inn to take pics and you said you don't have a lot of space, so it doesn't make sense to have everyone get ready there.

    I say go back to the inn on your anniversary.  That's when you'll really get to enjoy it.  Stay at the hotel for the wedding.
  • wow I can't believe how 50/50 the votes have been since I posted!  Thanks for all your suggestions/advice... I'm still not sure but I am being sort of swayed to the bigger room/cheaper/where people will be hotel... Someone up top hit the nail on the head that I like the outside of the one place and inside of the other!  FI is set on the Inn/pictures but then again he won't be the one stressing over getting ready and having the girls get ready and everything else :)  Keep it coming though, I appreciate the input!
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