would you find this weird?

aggiebug

A friend and former roomate of mine is getting married in about a month.  We were really close in College but have drifted apart enough to where I am not invited to the wedding.  I kind of want to get her a wedding gift.  Both FI and I know the bride and groom- they actually introduced FI and I, and I am super excited they are finally getting married. 

So would it be weird for me to get her a gift, even though I am not invited?  It wouldn't be big as I can't afford too much and I also don't want to make her think she should get us something for our wedding 6 months later.

opalsky007

I'd be surprised but really touched. Go for it!

akhensley81

I did the same thing for some friends a few years ago. They were having a really small wedding on the other side of the country and I knew I wouldn't be invited. I just picked a few things I could afford off their registry and had them shipped to them with a nice congratulatory note. Definitely go for it!

[Deleted User]

I think it is a very nice gesture and would be fine to go ahead and get her a gift. Maybe she is having a small wedding due to her budget and they couldn't invite you but would have loved to. I am sure she will be surprised, and you never know, maybe it will bring you closer again.

karmellah

i would be really touched and would probably seek you out to thank you. who knows our relationship may get better. im always willing to give thigns another try

danieliza1127

It's not weird at all!  Just wait to send it until very close to or right after the wedding, so she doesn't panic thinking that it means she has to invite you.    We get a lot of those kinds of posts.

AliGirl11

Yep, do it.  I did this for a childhood friend when she got married.  I just had such fond memories of our friendship even though we weren't close anymore.  She was very surprised, but also very touched. 

aggiebug

Thanks ladies! I really just don't want to make her feel bad about not inviting me and thinking she needs to get me something. I totally get why I am not invited and she isn't on our list right now. Good advice Dani. I def don't want to panic her

ShanaFry

Yes to all PP. I would be touched if someone did this for me. But I would wait untilo close to or after the wedding, so she isn't scrambling to find you a seat!

cmmosley81

Go for it. It kind of is a way to say hey I wish the best for you. I actually had a high school friend who I had a falling out with when we were like 19. She just got married a few months ago I wasnt invited which is fine I didnt really think I would be. I went to the store and got her a few things that were still on her registry and mailed them to her for when she got back from France. She called me up and was crying she was so happy. We have now met for coffee every Wed. since to catch up.

Celles

I think it's a sweet idea. 

cm42878

I think it shows what kind or person you are!! I agree with all PP, I would be very touched and it might very well bring you all back together. Kuddos to you for being a good thoughtful person!!

Birdie1483

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_would-this-weird-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:4b41a6f1-2d15-4f2c-9ee3-5160c66edee5Post:ddd7ec05-7979-42c4-be83-e4eb4c1f63aa">Re: would you find this weird?</a>:
[QUOTE]She called me up and was crying she was so happy. We have now met for coffee every Wed. since to catch up.
Posted by cmmosley81[/QUOTE]

Awww stories like this make me happy!

I say go for it!