Wedding Etiquette Forum
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actually WR - wedding party etiquette help

So if you will look at my ticker/countdown thing, you will see that our wedding is a good ways away. Friends of mine know this, yet they continue to ask to be in our wedding. Even FI's mom's boyfriend's daughter who is 13 and we have only known for 6 months. I have five sisters asking, his sister asking, and most of my friends asking. Is this proper etiquette? I thought we were supposed to ask them to be in our wedding party?

BTW, I just respond with "Whoa, don't make me think about all that planning yet! We aren't planning yet yadayada"

Re: actually WR - wedding party etiquette help

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    Good response. It's in terrible taste to ask to be in someone's WP. Change the subject. Say you're not ready to pick your WP yet and leave it at that.
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    Whatever you hatters be hattin. -Tay Prince
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    I would just go with what you already replied. You're not planning anything yet.
    9.17.2010
    planning

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    No, you are supposed to ask them, in a little under two years from now.

    Just say, "oh, we haven't decided anything yet, it's still so far off, haha."  And change the subject.
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    two years!
    after two losses, now happily expecting baby #1 09.16.12
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    Your answer sounds fine, and I do think it's rude to ask someone if you can be in their WP. 

    The 13 year old gets a pass, though.  Teenagers usually don't have as much etiquette and common sense as others.

    fwiw, only pick them around 8 months in advance.  There are tons and tons of horror stories on here about girls who picked too early and are dealing with the fallout.
    BFP(1) DD1 born 4.17.10 @ 33w5d due to pPROM
    BFP(4) DD2 born 2.14.13 @ 35w5d due to pPROM

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    Ditto PP

    Good response from you though!
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    "The wedding is soooo far away, we haven't even thought about our bridal party yet"

    and keep it that was for another 16 months.  It's way too soon to be asking, friendships change andyou can wind up regretting it
    This is posted almost daily on Wedding Party board
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    Oh sorry I didn't think to check the Wedding Party board. I don't know why though lol.

    Thanks for clearing it up though. I thought it seemed a little rude. And I agree about the 13 year old. I tried to be really nice with her and explain. She understood better than anyone else. Sigh.
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    I'm going to guess that your friends and sisters are all teenagers - they do this a lot I've noticed. Along with "I better get an invite!" Ugh
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    Yep all but three of them are. My sisters are all younger. It's mainly phrased as "I better get to walk down the aisle with someone hot" and Im standing there trying to remember when I asked them.
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