Inviting guests to morning-after brunch at their cost...how to word?

futuremrsgates

We're doing booklet invitations and will be inviting guests to join us - if they'd like - at a local Mimi's Cafe for brunch the morning after the wedding. How do we word it to let it know that they are not required to come, and if they choose to come, they'll be paying for themselves?

chelseamb11

Your best bet would be to do word of mouth if people will be paying for themselves.  Formally inviting them, in any way, insinuates you'll pay for them.  And it's rude to put on an invitation that people need to pay for themselves.

futuremrsgates

I had no intentions of telling them flat-out that they're paying, I just wanted the best possible way to let the most amount of people know

polichik

If you send an invitation, you need to pay for it. You could put something on the wedding website about it, but I'd just stick to work of mouth.

Honestly, I wish we hadn't done a morning-after brunch. I would have rather slept in.

chelseamb11

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_inviting-guests-morning-after-brunch-their-costhow-word?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:4cf959b4-c418-4151-8daa-4e50a3278825Post:09df4c3e-285e-46cc-9255-1af2c7e81228">Inviting guests to morning-after brunch at their cost...how to word?</a>:
[QUOTE]We're doing booklet invitations and will be inviting guests to join us - if they'd like - at a local Mimi's Cafe for brunch the morning after the wedding. How do we word it to let it know that they are not required to come, and i<strong>f they choose to come, they'll be paying for themselves?</strong>
Posted by futuremrsgates[/QUOTE]

That kind of insinuates that you want to tell them they have to pay for themselves.  Honestly, like I said, I'd stick to the word of mouth.  You'd be surprise how quickly it spreads!

futuremrsgates

Okay, word of mouth - got it! Thanks.

jemmini6

I love Mimi's.  That is all.

ElisabethJoanne

I think you can also do an e-mail equivalent of word-of-mouth. Spoken, you'd say something like, "By the way, some of us are getting together the morning after at Mimi's at X time. You and your family are welcome to join us." You can put that in e-mails, too.

I prefer e-mails to spoken, because the details are in writing. It's a busy time, and out-of-town people may need to look up the address, etc. Better to have it in writing.

Also, unless the spoken invitation came from a family member of the bride or groom, I'd be reluctant to take it seriously. "Even if I'm obviously paying my own way, does this person really know enough about the event to be adding people?"

And, IME, you can't trust word-of-mouth to reach everyone.

futuremrsgates

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_inviting-guests-morning-after-brunch-their-costhow-word?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:4cf959b4-c418-4151-8daa-4e50a3278825Post:4e9615e7-62d0-44bb-babe-42cedbc46024">Re: Inviting guests to morning-after brunch at their cost...how to word?</a>:
[QUOTE]I love Mimi's.  That is all.
Posted by jemmini6[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>Yeah, I was gonna go to IHOP or Waffe House,but the FI demanded that boozing could continue ("Mimosa hangover cures!" he now says) so we picked Mimi's.</div>

cmhutchison22

I don't get the morning after brunch.  All those eyes on you thinking in their head, I know what you did last night.  If you want to have a morning after brunch then go for it. It just doesn't appeal to me.  Best way to let everyone know about it would be email.

Melissa603

We are doing a party later in the day the next day - beer and hot wings...much better than bunch in our opinion - no having to get up haha

B&K10+13+12

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_inviting-guests-morning-after-brunch-their-costhow-word?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:4cf959b4-c418-4151-8daa-4e50a3278825Post:f74b504e-fd40-4641-bb8b-c18caa4049a2">Re: Inviting guests to morning-after brunch at their cost...how to word?</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't get the morning after brunch.  All those eyes on you thinking in their head, I know what you did last night.  If you want to have a morning after brunch then go for it. It just doesn't appeal to me.  Best way to let everyone know about it would be email.
Posted by cmhutchison22[/QUOTE]

I was wondering if I was the only one who felt this way.

Summer2011Bride

I don't find it weird--lots of people in our circle do them, but usually they combine them with gift-opening (which I do find odd). However, we preferred sleeping in

Like others have said, word of mouth is best, even at the RD or wedding itself. Just something casual like, "Hey, some of us are grabbing brunch at Mimi's tomorrow at this time if you want to come."

LetsHikeToday

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_inviting-guests-morning-after-brunch-their-costhow-word?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:4cf959b4-c418-4151-8daa-4e50a3278825Post:d8e94ab9-78a6-407f-be50-23c5a7383e3b">Re: Inviting guests to morning-after brunch at their cost...how to word?</a>:
[QUOTE]If you send an invitation, you need to pay for it. You could put something on the wedding website about it, but I'd just stick to work of mouth. Honestly, I wish we hadn't done a morning-after brunch. <strong>I would have rather slept in.
</strong>Posted by polichik[/QUOTE]

Everyone gave you great advice so I have nothing to add except this. We didn't have one and I was so thankful. I had a little too much to drink and was definitely sick the next day.

skantrowitz

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_inviting-guests-morning-after-brunch-their-costhow-word?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:4cf959b4-c418-4151-8daa-4e50a3278825Post:4e9615e7-62d0-44bb-babe-42cedbc46024">Re: Inviting guests to morning-after brunch at their cost...how to word?</a>:
[QUOTE]I love Mimi's.  That is all.
Posted by jemmini6[/QUOTE]



Me too... such good muffins!

toothpastechica

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_inviting-guests-morning-after-brunch-their-costhow-word?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:4cf959b4-c418-4151-8daa-4e50a3278825Post:f74b504e-fd40-4641-bb8b-c18caa4049a2">Re: Inviting guests to morning-after brunch at their cost...how to word?</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't get the morning after brunch.  All those eyes on you thinking in their head, I know what you did last night.  If you want to have a morning after brunch then go for it. It just doesn't appeal to me.  Best way to let everyone know about it would be email.
Posted by cmhutchison22[/QUOTE]

I agree, I guess if you have already lived together for a long time, it might not seem so wierd, but not living with FI yet makes me go...ugh I dont want to get up and go out for breakfast with people who know we were 'toghether' the night before. FI's cousin had a brunch the next morning and it awesome, but it really only family and the wedding party (and a couple stragglers who had hung out with the wedding party the night before), the info and prices were communicated casually (verbally - anyone who wanted to) at the rehersal dinner.