Wedding Etiquette Forum

addressing invitation to club member friend

I have been formally addressing our invitations according to convention taking into account persons who are married, widowed, living together, same gender couples etc.  

My finacé a member of a club of 25 gentlemen, all of whom are invited.  The invitations are addressed to Mr. & Mrs. in the case of married, Mr. only in the case of singles or casual dating members of the club, or Ms. Brown and Mr. Jones (alphabetically by last name) in the case of living together couples.

Here's my question.  My fiancé's ex wife has been dating one of the club members for so long, they're just a fixture in the group.  They are both welcome at our wedding, but I don't know how to address the envelope.  The do not live together, so convention would dictate the envelope get addressed just to him, but we don't want her to feel like she's not invited, but also it would look wierd to send her one separately.  Suggestions?  Her name comes before his alphabetically.


Re: addressing invitation to club member friend

  • You could still address it to both of them at his address. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • Wow, you are a pretty tolerant person to invite your FI's ex-wife to your wedding.


    Mr. John Smith
    Ms. Sarah Johnson
    123 Main Street
    Anytown, USA 54321


    p.s. what is a Club? Like, a VFW Hall or Elk's Lodge or Free Masons or something? It must be a regional term I'm unfamiliar with.
  • Her name should go after his on a seperate line, as should all other girlfriends of these guys who aren't living with them.  'casually dating' means dating mulitple people or refering to the girl as "the chick I went out with last friday"  If these guys have a girl they call their "girlfriend" then they are a social unit and need to be invited together.
  • Thanks for those clarifications... I like the two lines... his name first, then hers, then his address...  that will work nicely.

    It's not a formal fraternal club like the Elks or Masons, but a local "association" that has been together for 35 years.  This particular club is for motorcycle riders, but there are also car clubs that operate much the same way.  They commonly have annual events that are fundraisers for the Salvation Army or other charities - usually donating the money raised to children's or family causes.

    The ex is not a bad person, they just did not fit together.  :)

    Thanks much for the advice.  peg
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