I come from a divorced household and as my fiance and I begin talking about our wedding I feel like the word "solution" comes up all the time. Everything we do revolves around the fact that my parents just can't get along and my father completely cut my sister out of his life after her wedding (this is a long story so I won't go into details but it invovled my mother as well). So mainly I now feel like I can't do anything for my wedding because of how I feel it's inevitable that my parents will act (aka not showing up). If I accept money from my well to do father he expects my mother to pay for her guests- but she can't so then he won't 'let" her come. So I've decided we should just pay for the wedding ourselves but now it's come down to what we believe we can afford is just the ceremony because we don't want to offend anyone by not having a big reception (because we just can't afford one). I just feel that my fiance is going to begin resenting my because we can't have a wedding without one of parents acting up and potentially not coming and everything I try and do is a solution to their issue instead of trying to plan what we want. Ok I should admit what I want is for both of my parents to be there BUT I don't want to sacrifice what my fiancee and I want.
Any advice on how to deal with this issue would be appreciated- I just feel like I'm in a position where I can either have both my parents at my wedding or I can try and give my fiancee the wedding he would like (and I would) while alienating someone.