EEK Faux pas

fyrefairie

My FMIL (who I love) invited someone to my shower who wasn't invited to the wedding (MOH hosted the shower...FMIL thought she was being helpful by invititing)  the person she invited is an in-law of an in-law by best description....not a person that is important to my FI and I...FMIL just thought since she is at some family gatherings (involving the other side of the fam) that it made sense to invite her to the shower....Should I at this point invite this person or let it go or what?Please spare me any lectures on how this could have been avoided...it was an honest mistake by FMIL...I had reviewed the guest list with MOH to ensure no such faux pas, but FMIL isn't super versed on formal etiquette and meant well......

Beachy730

Is it possible to add this woman to your wedding guest list now? 

fyrefairie

I could...she would be getting a late invite, quite obviously seeing as today was my RSVP deadline but we can afford to add one more person...but there's no getting around the obviousness that she was not originally invited....

Beachy730

I didn't realize your wedding was so close to your shower, so I was thinking you had more time.  Hmmm, I honestly don't know the proper thing to do here.  Sorry I'm not more help.  My advice would probably be to make FMIL extend the wedding invite to her, since she was the one to make the mistake.

fyrefairie

It is very close...just worked out best for people that way, my dad had radiation treatment that just ended so my mom could't come any sooner and I couldn't imagine not having her at my shower.....I don't want to dump it on my FMIL it was an honest and well intended mistake....I just don't know what would be in poorer form to invite her after the fact quite obviously or not invite her even though she got invited to the shower.....I have no problem adding her she is one person I just don't know what would be more offensive

tidetravel

I wouldn't worry about it, this close to the wedding.  You didn't do the inviting to the shower.  The faux paux was on the part of your FMIL, not you.

smokeybailey

Let it go.  Old ladies go to showers all the time whether they are invited or not.  It's something that they do.  It will be fine.

tenofcups4me

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_eek-faux-pas?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:5785d88d-3d53-4065-b477-869cbc428c58Post:01575f8f-8a29-40a8-8128-a9158ed53ae6">Re: EEK Faux pas</a>:
[QUOTE]Let it go.  Old ladies go to showers all the time whether they are invited or not.  It's something that they do.  It will be fine.
Posted by smokeybailey[/QUOTE]

What a patronizing and weird response.

I'd send the invitation. It's only one person.

kimp67

I would invite her.

DramaGeek

I'd go with the "your invite must have gotten lost" strategy and invite her.  While it wasn't your faux pas, you can make up for it, and she may not come anyway.

banana468

I'd say it's up to you - but if this guest knows a thing or two about weddings, she may already know that she wasn't invited since your big day is under a month away and she hasn't received an invitation yet - and that leads me to believe she might even be cool with it.