Wedding Shower for a Destination Wedding?

ginx1188

Long story short we decided to have a destination wedding in december, but we still plan to get married in the church at home (long story) and have a reception back at home so we can invite all our friends and family. My mother thinks it's poor ettiquet to have a bridal shower for a destination wedding...... I think she's wrong, but any thoughts on the topic?

Thanks

DramaGeek

If you're having a destination wedding, how can you get married at home too?

The bridal shower is not in poor taste if all shower guests are also invited to the wedding.  And by wedding, I mean the one where you make a legally binding contract with your husband.

Summer2011Bride

Ditto PP. Why are you having two weddings? I would personally just stick with the DW if that's really what you want.

Anyone invited to that wedding then can be invited to a shower.

Loopyseven

What is the point of a DW if you're still going to do a church "wedding" and reception?  I don't get it.

Only people who are invited to the DW (which I assume is the one where you will actually be exchanging legally binding vows and paperwork) can be invited to any pre-wedding parties.

AdeleDazeem

Are you getting marred in your church at home and re-enacting your wedding at a destination?  Ew.

banana468

If the DW is the event where you two will tie TK then that's the event where the shower guest list is based.

Furthermore, it wouldn't be appropriate to invite some people to your convalidation / blessing if they aren't invited to the DW.  Pick a guest list and stick to it.

RebeccaB88

All of your shower guests must be invited to the wedding where you actually, you know, get married. 

Solution - have your legal wedding in your hometown in your church and invite everyone. Have your shower before this one.  Have your pretend wedding alone on your honeymoon. Hell, have one every day alone on your honeymoon if you want.  Then it's no biggie because you aren't breaking any rules. But if you get legally married at your DW, you have to either invite all your shower guests (with SOs) or not have a shower. Your choice.

ThankfulSnail

I agree completely with PPs. You only get married to the same person once, unless there is a divorce in between the weddings. I don't understand the point of having a church and a destination wedding.

Pick one wedding from those two, nix the other, fake wedding, and make a guest list for your wedding. Anyone invited to the wedding may be invited to the shower, but only people receiving an invitation to your wedding can be invited to the shower.