Wedding Etiquette Forum

WWYD?

I got an invitation to a Christmas party this Friday night. The invitation was addressed to only me (neither my husband nor my children were mentioned). I would really like to go to this party, but I don't have a regular babysitter available (my parents are going to the same party, and I'm so fucking pissed at my MsIL right now that I'm not speaking to either of them. Husband has told them that they owe me a huge apology, but that hasn't been forthcoming.)

Re: WWYD?

  • If they say no Sara, I'll babysit. :)  Hope the kids like pizza and playing Wii.

    Go out and party.  It's good to get out of the house.

  • I vote that you should send your regrets, but then thought, if your H isn't invited, why can't he stay home with the kids while you go to the party for a little while?
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  • Can't your DH watch the kids and you go to the party with your parents?

    That is what I would do.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • Husband has to work that night, so he can't watch the girls. yeah, the host and hostess made a social faux pas by not inviting my husband (social unit and all of that), but I'm not going to commit another by calling to ask if my children can come.
  • What kind of party is it? If it's a girl's night or something then there are situations where I can se your H not being invited. If it's a work function or cocktail party, obviously SOs should be on the invite. In that case, if they aren't following proper etiquette, I'd be likely to decline based on principle, unless it was someone I was really close to. End Emily Post-like advice.
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  • What about another babysitter?  Friend?  Friend's trusted sitter?
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  • If you don't have a regular babysitter available, can you get a referral?  I know when I was in high school (and it was the same for my sis 7 years later), if a friend couldn't babysit one of their "regular" families, they'd give my name & number and refer me as a fill-in.  Same with my sis, she became a backup babysitter for some of her friends.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wwyd-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5c87ce08-7bcf-4ddf-ba4f-f1be69d27cd1Post:e3ca2a16-8a28-4578-9a00-2ddd034daf52">Re: WWYD?</a>:
    [QUOTE]If you don't have a regular babysitter available, can you get a referral?  I know when I was in high school (and it was the same for my sis 7 years later), if a friend couldn't babysit one of their "regular" families, they'd give my name & number and refer me as a fill-in.  Same with my sis, she became a backup babysitter for some of her friends.
    Posted by LarissaAnn[/QUOTE]

    Same with me.  I was always getting calls to be a fill-in babysitter.

    How old are your kids?   I find it odd you do not know anyone to babysit.   Even now I'm asked by some friends to watch their kids.  It's not often, but I happily do it for them.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • What about teachers at your daughters' school? There may be some (not their current ones) willing to babysit; I know several of my former coworkers would babysit.

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  • I wouldn't call and see if your kids are invited, but I'd call and decline and cite the reason why.  It gives the host an opportunity to invite them without you asking.  And you could just be courteous letting them know that it will take you a little bit longer to rsvp because of the sitter situation.
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  • I voted that you suck it up, but I actually just meant that you should try to find another baby sitter. You have 4 full days before then, you have time to do a few interviews.

    I know that people at my church always used to call me to baby sit when I was younger.

    Perhaps if you're involved in a church you could call one of the good teenagers?
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wwyd-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:5c87ce08-7bcf-4ddf-ba4f-f1be69d27cd1Post:70ad5fc9-79f4-449a-b3e3-4c14cbd0b0f7">Re: WWYD?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: WWYD? : Same with me.  I was always getting calls to be a fill-in babysitter. How old are your kids?  Posted by lyndausvi[/QUOTE]
    Sorry about the post and runs. Pesky work, getting in the way of my time here. My kids are 11 and 8, but we've only lived in this area for for just over 2 years, so I don't know a whole lot of people here. I never thought about asking around at my daughters' school. Great idea!
  • If they were a lot younger, than I would understand more.  But 11 and 8 year olds are pretty easy to take care.    I'm sure you must have a neighbor or something that would have suggestions..






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wwyd-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:5c87ce08-7bcf-4ddf-ba4f-f1be69d27cd1Post:8a1e9142-9cb9-4937-bd6d-66aa46b67f79">Re: WWYD?</a>:
    [QUOTE]What kind of party is it? If it's a girl's night or something then there are situations where I can se your H not being invited. If it's a work function or cocktail party, obviously SOs should be on the invite. Posted by msmerymac[/QUOTE]
    It is a cocktail-type party. Host and hostess are the assisting priest at our church and his wife. I can count on 1 hand the number of teenagers at the church, and I'm not terribly close (geographically or otherwise) to them.

    Looks like I'm sitting this one out. Thanks ladies!
  • i'm not sure how close you are to the host.. but if you are close I would def ask why the husband wasn't invited as well. But if you can't find a sitter... then you don't have much of a choice as to attend or not. Do you want to go?

  • From the original post

    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wwyd-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:5c87ce08-7bcf-4ddf-ba4f-f1be69d27cd1Post:7cfae2a1-65b3-4fd0-b926-03701071f3e7">WWYD?</a>:
    [QUOTE] I would really like to go to this party, but I don't have a regular babysitter available ...
    Posted by sarabellam[/QUOTE]
    Um, yeah, I think I was obvious on that one.
  • edited December 2009
    I vote that your H asks his mother to babysit, perhaps as part of her apology to you for whatever she did that has created the need for an apology.
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