Would my ceremony music bore you? or, how many songs are too many?

polichik

CN: Is it ok to have two full songs performed during the ceremony? We'll be having music as the parents/BP/bride walk in and recessional music, but is it too much to have two songs performed as part of the ceremony? Since two of our closest friends will be performing the ceremony music, I want to finalize our music so that they have plenty of time to practice together.


Detail stuff: There's a lot of music we'd like to use, but I'm wondering if it's too much. Right now, we're thinking:

Guests getting settled, parents walking in, BP walking in - "Orange Sky" by Alexi Murdoch and "Chase This Light" by Jimmy Eat World (2-3 minutes total)

Me walking down the aisle - "Pretty Voice" by Cloud Cult (probably about 60-90 seconds)

Full song in the ceremony - "Faling Slowly," about 3 minutes

2nd full song (?) - "Such Great Heights" - Iron & Wine (about 2.5 minutes)

Benediction - "Seven Fold Amen" (about 90 seconds)

Recessional - "Anyone Else But You" by Moldy Peaches, (about 90 seconds)

Does that sound OK for a music-loving couple, or am I going to put my guests to sleep?

beatlesgirl25

I'll listen to these next, but are you sure you want to post this right now with the musical troll around?

Kati0105

I really like all your music choices but I still think it's a bit much.  As a guest I'd be wondering why there were full songs playing mid-ceremony. 

JessAndTrav

I hate to admit it, but I'd probably have to yawn through some of that, though I must say, you have excellent choices in music, so I would possibly enjoy it.

Think about who is going to be in the crowd. Will it be a majority of "adults" (people that you view as an adult, since we seldom think of ourselves as adults) or will you have lots of friends that enjoy the same music?

jasmineh7777

What would you be doing during the songs? Some friends of ours did a full song shortly before their vows, and they just stood up there for 3 or 4 minutes, looking increasingly uncomfortable.

Music and Lyrics

put me on repeat girll
let's go again and again
no matter AM or FM
'cuz baby girl, this is the music for loooove

ac_in_dc

You can always put at  least one of the songs beforehand, while the guests are getting settled and waiting for the important people to process in. There's *a lot* of time for that at the beginning of the ceremony since most folks show up 20 minutes early for a wedding.

But it's hard to judge without having a sense of what else is happening in your ceremony/how the whole thing will flow. Most of the ceremonies I go to are religious and they're long and there's a ton of music, but the music usually accompanies something specific like a candle lighting or communion or something.

mandybear7

I like all of those songs, so I would like it. It's awesome that your friends can perform all of that!

If you're nervous about it in regards to length, you could ask if they would before right before the toasts or something at the reception. The last wedding I went to, they had a traditional church ceremony, so at the reception their friend sang Regina Spektor's "Real Love" at that time and it worked out great.

mrsamyjones

WhiIe I LOVE your music selection, two songs during the ceremony would kinda annoy me. But that may be because the last wedding I went to the bride had her daughter sing two songs and then her daughter suprised her with a third song...oh ya her daughter was like 12 and while she had been taking singing lessons it was super annoying and off key.

beatlesgirl25

I am accustomed to hearing full songs at Mass ceremonies, where they are religious in nature and performed live. Usually I find myself thinking "here we go again." I'm not sure how I'd feel about a pre-recorded contemporary song being played. It might actually be more bearable.

georgia_bride09

To me, the most boring part of a ceremony is having to listen to a song while the B&G just stand there. I could maybe handle one full song, but two would have me looking at my watch. While the songs are meaningful to you as a couple, the majority of the crowd will be wondering when the song is going to end.

FutureMrsTR

What are you doing during the songs?  My best friend had a Garth Brooks song play during her ceremony and they were just standing there holding hands and staring at each other and it was kind of weird to me.  However, I haven't been to a lot of weddings so maybe it's common.

polichik

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_would-ceremony-music-bore-many-songs-many?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:601959b2-bdf3-4bb5-8c37-d92fdeaa2d74Post:9b7bfe6a-bfea-4db6-bb39-c4e2db04dc90">Re: Would my ceremony music bore you? or, how many songs are too many?</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>You can always put at  least one of the songs beforehand, while the guests are getting settled and waiting for the important people to process in. There's *a lot* of time for that at the beginning of the ceremony since most folks show up 20 minutes early for a wedding</strong>. But it's hard to judge without having a sense of what else is happening in your ceremony/how the whole thing will flow. Most of the ceremonies I go to are religious and they're long and there's a ton of music, but the music usually accompanies something specific like a candle lighting or communion or something.
Posted by ac_in_dc[/QUOTE]

That's a great point... I didn't even think of that!

I went to a wedding where the couple sat in chairs close to where they were standing and the BP sat down in the front row while the musicians played... It was really nice. I could definitely see it being long, though! We'll probably move "Such Great Heights" to before the ceremony and keep "Falling Slowly."

Just about all of my side of the famliy/friends will know most of these songs. FI's family probably wouldn't enjoy them quite as much, so maybe I'll keep some of them shorter. The only one where we wouldn't be doing anything would be during "Falling Slowly." It's such a gorgeous song, and I'm having visions of my two friends just rocking it.

pirategal03

I love full songs mid-ceremony.  So I think your choices here are good.  Two full songs wouldn't bother me as a guest unless the rest of the ceremony was already super-long. 

polichik

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_would-ceremony-music-bore-many-songs-many?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:601959b2-bdf3-4bb5-8c37-d92fdeaa2d74Post:511943bb-5e3b-4478-add6-262d08b5e3c9">Re: Would my ceremony music bore you? or, how many songs are too many?</a>:
[QUOTE]To me, the most boring part of a ceremony is having to listen to a song while the B&G just stand there. I could maybe handle one full song, but two would have me looking at my watch. <strong>While the songs are meaningful to you as a couple, the majority of the crowd will be wondering when the song is going to end.</strong>
Posted by georgia_bride09[/QUOTE]

That makes a lot of sense.

cukimerrydoll

I'm for it if you're doing other things during the music.

Mrs_AF

Orange Sky is one of my all time favorite songs. I agree that if other things are going on during the music then it shouldn't be a problem. But if your guests are just watching you stare lovingly into eachother's eyes for 3 minutes, it might get awkward.

Brie2010

I'd be really, really bored.  It's awkward for there to be music with nothing else going on, IMO, besides the couple staring oogly at each other.

Night_Sprite

My brother sang a solo during the ceremony, during which we lit the unity candle.  We had one other very short congregational hymn.  I would consider the songs having some other purpose aside from song.  The hymn tied into the scripture and homily we had.  We're also congregational hymn families.

polichik

I've been looking into doing a Celtic hand binding ceremony (much less scary than it sounds), so maybe that could be an option during "Falling Slowly."

keegzzz

Pretty sure we are musical soulmates. Justsayin.

We're doing Alexi Murdoch for our processional too, except we're doing "All of my Days," and our first date was to go see Once, so "Falling Slowly" is kind of "our" song.

As far as if that's TOO much... I dont' think so, as long as the songs are well-placed & your guests aren't just going to be sitting there listening... WATCHING someone perform keeps people engaged usually, so performances are OK--make sure they can see the musicians.

I agree with PPs--if you're DOING something during the music, that's probably best.

luckyme502

One yes, two, you'd lose me.  I don't like songs in the middle of the ceremony anyway, but two would just be too much for me.