invites- "and guest?"

Abar0302

Hey brides-to-be.  I'm addressing my envelopes and kinda stuck.  We are having a destination beach wedding...not a black tie occasion, but semiformal...so I didn't order inner envelopes or anything fancy.  I have an envelope, invite, accommodation card and RSVP post card.  So where do I write and guest for my single friends/friends with bf and gfs???  Do I just write it on the envelope or do I not write it at all?  I wrote it on the save the dates, so people know they can bring someone, but what if they think I changed my mind??  My fiance is telling me not to worry about and the only person who will probably care about etiquette is my grandmother! haha!  THanks for all of your help, ladies :-)  Happy planning.

Avion22

If they are dating someone, then you should find out the name of the boyfriend/girlfriend, and address them by name on the outer envelope.  Example:

Ms. Jane Doe

Mr. John Smith

123 Main Street

Anytown, USA 12345

If you are extending a +1 to single guests, you can simple say "Ms. Jane Doe and Guest".  However, if she replies with a guest, you should find out the guest's name for placecards and such.

eirwyn

For SO's, you would address the envelope as:

Ms. Jane Smith

Mr. Tom Jones

Address (friend's address)

If they are single, you can address it as:

Ms. Jane Smith and Guest

Address

Please do not use "and Guest" if they are dating someone. It is proper etiquette to address their SO by name. If you aren't sure if they're dating someone (or don't know their SO's name), it's a good idea to ask.

Abar0302

Right - absolutley I have all the names of the boyfriends/girlfriends.  I was just wondering about the single friends and family I guess.  So afterall it is okay to write and guest on the envelope, even though etiquette all over the place tells you not to?

Avion22

Where have you seen that "and Guest" is against etiquette?   I've seen both "and Guest" and "and Escort" recommended by different websites....though I think escort sounds kinda weird...

Abar0302

A couple different websites say it's just meant for the inner envelope.  I'm pretty sure the knot is one of them! 

Avion22

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invites-and-guest?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:650f49aa-816a-40e3-a6a1-b70eb47aebeePost:cd484fd3-7d84-4f1f-a036-741e3f52f284">Re: invites- "and guest?"</a>:
[QUOTE]A couple different websites say it's just meant for the inner envelope.  I'm pretty sure the knot is one of them! 
Posted by Abar0302[/QUOTE]

<div>Ah, I see.  You're correct, if there are both outer and inner envelopes then you put "and Guest" on the inner envelope only.</div><div>
</div><div>If there's no inner envelope, then the outer envelope is the only way to convey to your guests that they can bring a date if they want.  So that's where you put it.   </div><div>
</div><div>
</div>

Abar0302

Do you think that's tacky?  I clearly wasn't thinking when I ordered my invites. Thanks for your help, Avion.

eirwyn

I don't think it's tacky to write it on the outer envelope, especially since the lack of an inner envelope leaves you with no other option.

Avion22

Well, it's exactly what I did, so I might not be the best judge of whether or not it's tacky.   But I can tell you that the wording above seems to be the general consensus on these boards, and the ladies on here are sticklers!   

pokepoke27

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invites-and-guest?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:650f49aa-816a-40e3-a6a1-b70eb47aebeePost:98f66f26-6ce8-4b7a-bbbf-56a2f8c529d2">Re: invites- "and guest?"</a>:
[QUOTE]Where have you seen that "and Guest" is against etiquette?   I've seen both "and Guest" and "and Escort" recommended by different websites....though I think escort sounds kinda weird...
Posted by Avion22[/QUOTE]

<div>Yeah, "Escort" will always bring one thing to mind first lol</div>