Wedding Etiquette Forum
Options

Private Ceremony - Huge Reception?

I have been married before and neither me nor my fiancee want a huge church wedding or anything of the sort. All we want at the ceremony is ourselves, my kids, my MOH, his BM and our parents. Then we want to have a big reception/cookout party for all of our extended friends and family. Everyone we have talked to says it's a great idea because we really don't want a big ceremony, we'd rather spend the money on a reception for everyone to enjoy. I also have a five year old with Autism and a long elaborate ceremony just isn't going to happen with him. I just want others opinions on it to avoid fighting with someone over it later. Note, the ceremony is at a gazebo in the middle of town and anyone that wanted to show up could, but we aren't sending out formal invitations to the ceremony or doing music or anything like that, just a simple exchange of vows and rings.

Re: Private Ceremony - Huge Reception?

  • Options
    Sounds lovely!
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
  • Options
    auriannaaurianna member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited January 2013
    I think you're safe with that. Truly private weddings (immediate family only, generally) can usually get away with having a reception without its being considered a tiered wedding.
    Truth be told, if you did formally invite everyone and there weren't chairs for them to sit, that would be rude.

    But I think your plan is OK.

    ETA
    I love gazebos... prettyful.
  • Options
    Thanks, we have an acre behind our house plus a huge blacktopped area/basketball court and with a fiancee that is in a band, we have the sound equipment. We aren't even staying in our "wedding clothes" LOL We are cutting the cake in our dressy stuff then changing out of them into jeans and shirts that truly show off how much of a geek couple we are. Thanks for my dear fiancee buying us Khal and Khaleesi shirts for Christmas. Sad thing is, that is exactly what our friends expect! LOL
  • Options
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_private-ceremony-huge-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:69971140-ef47-4cd1-8b85-2094f9ac7bd4Post:7ea6272f-faa4-475f-8182-e8d0645d245e">Re: Private Ceremony - Huge Reception?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Thanks, we have an acre behind our house plus a huge blacktopped area/basketball court and with a fiancee that is in a band, we have the sound equipment. We aren't even staying in our "wedding clothes" LOL We are cutting the cake in our dressy stuff then changing out of them into jeans and shirts that truly show off how much of a geek couple we are. Thanks for my dear fiancee buying us Khal and Khaleesi shirts for Christmas. Sad thing is, that is exactly what our friends expect! LOL
    Posted by TargBride3[/QUOTE]



    Your plan sounds lovely. If a ceremony is just immediate family, then it is fine to have a private ceremony and large reception. It only becomes rude if you invite like 100 people to the ceremony and 200 people to the reception, and don't keep the ceremony truly private. What you are planning is perfectly fine, though. And the Khal and Khaleesi shirts sound awesome. I wondered if your user name was a Game of Thrones reference when I saw it :)
  • Options
    It's technically not a rude plan, but I personally would be sad to not get to see the ceremony.
  • Options
    In Response to Re:Private Ceremony Huge Reception?:[QUOTE]Thanks, we have an acre behind our house plus a huge blacktopped area/basketball court and with a fiancee that is in a band, we have the sound equipment. We aren't even staying in our quot;wedding clothesquot; LOL We are cutting the cake in our dressy stuff then changing out of them into jeans and shirts that truly show off how much of a geek couple we are. Thanks for my dear fiancee buying us Khal and Khaleesi shirts for Christmas. Sad thing is, that is exactly what our friends expect! LOL Posted by TargBride3[/QUOTE]

    Oh I miss khal : march 31st!! Winter is coming
    158 Invited image | 68 will be there image |6 can't make it image | 84 still need to reply! image
    RSVP Deadline: 4/6/13
    4/26/13 March Siggy Challenge: Bridesmaid Dresses

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Options
    What you have in mind sounds lovely.  Best wishes!
  • Options
    I think so long as you keep it immediate family only it will be great. Congratulations!
  • Options
    From one geek family to another I think it sounds lovely.  Our 17 yo DS has Asperger's (I am still going to use that term, DSM be dammed) and while he is very high functioning, I do understand what a lot of stimulation and pomp and circumstance could do for a little guy like yours.   I think your plan rocks.
  • Options
    It sounds like a perfect wedding and a very fun reception.  Congratulations!
  • Options
    sounds like a great plan.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • Options
    Love the shirts! I'm reading all the books right now lol Your plan sounds great! Enjoy!
  • Options
    Sounds like a great plan, enjoy!!
  • Options
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_private-ceremony-huge-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:69971140-ef47-4cd1-8b85-2094f9ac7bd4Post:7ea6272f-faa4-475f-8182-e8d0645d245e">Re: Private Ceremony - Huge Reception?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Thanks, we have an acre behind our house plus a huge blacktopped area/basketball court and with a fiancee that is in a band, we have the sound equipment. We aren't even staying in our "wedding clothes" LOL We are cutting the cake in our dressy stuff then changing out of them into jeans and shirts that truly show off how much of a geek couple we are.<strong> Thanks for my dear fiancee buying us Khal and Khaleesi shirts for Christma</strong>s. Sad thing is, that is exactly what our friends expect! LOL
    Posted by TargBride3[/QUOTE]

    That's amazing!
    my read shelf:
    Meredith's book recommendations, liked quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (read shelf)
    40/112

    Photobucket
  • Options
    I have to say that I love you guys! Ya gotta appreciate other AGoT fans....
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards