Wedding Etiquette Forum

Need catering head count 30 days out.....when to send invites?

Wedding date is June 1st.

The caterer wants the FIRST head count by May 1st and a SECOND head count by May 20th.
(I don't know why, apparently they have had some issues with brides over/under estimating....)

So, I set the date to RSVP by April 25th (I know, that's a month before the wedding, but I had no choice) to give me a few days to make some phone calls if I don't get RSVP's back.

When should I send these suckers out?  April 1st? Which is roughly 8 weeks before the wedding and gives them around 4 weeks to get them back in the mail?

I know the catering thing is dumb, but it was the only venue not super far away that had an outside ceremony grounds, ceremony and reception location, and didn't bust the budget.  Also, the food is pretty dang good.  So, I can't do anything about the date and I've decided to bite the bullet and take the perks over the drawbacks.  I just don't want to send these invites out way too far in advance than they are already going to be.

Thanks!

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June 1, 2013 - finally making it official!

Re: Need catering head count 30 days out.....when to send invites?

  • itzMSitzMS member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers First Anniversary
    Your original idea sounds pretty good.

    Or you could tell the caterer your first count (just make it 100% of your guest list) and then set the RSVP date for about a week before the second count is due and call in the firm number at that point.
  • lyndausvilyndausvi mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited March 2013
    I would still do 8 weeks out.  You could push it 9 but not really past that.


    I think venues do this in order to get more money out of you. IDK  Product wise there is no need to have the count out that far.   Heck, even labor wise either.     I'm sorry their policies are riduclous.


    GL


    ETA - I would have the RSVP date May 15th.  You can give soft numbers on the 1st.  Just take the number of invites - minus the declines you receive by that point..  Then give the hard number of the 20th.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-catering-head-count-30-days-outwhen-to-send-invites?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:6f450b37-5e11-40e1-845f-aa50c8e720efPost:489021b8-046a-4cac-9a63-1dbddcbd1799">Re: Need catering head count 30 days out.....when to send invites?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Your original idea sounds pretty good. Or you could tell the caterer your first count (just make it 100% of your guest list) and then set the RSVP date for about a week before the second count is due and call in the firm number at that point.
    Posted by itzMS[/QUOTE]

    WHY oh WHY did I not think of thise before I ordered the invites!?!?  The date is already on there!  GRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!! Fail on my part.  Should have asked this question a month ago!

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    June 1, 2013 - finally making it official!

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-catering-head-count-30-days-outwhen-to-send-invites?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:6f450b37-5e11-40e1-845f-aa50c8e720efPost:d15a18b9-aa29-4be6-883e-55922bd4049e">Re: Need catering head count 30 days out.....when to send invites?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I would still do 8 weeks out.  You could push it 9 but not really past that. I think venues do this in order to get more money out of you. IDK  Product wise there is no need to have the count out that far.   Heck, even labor wise either.     I'm sorry their policies are riduclous. GL
    Posted by lyndausvi[/QUOTE]

    yeah I don't get it either, I just knew it wasn't a deal breaker so I dealt with it.  So April 6th would be at 8 weeks.  Hopefully I am safe around then.

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    June 1, 2013 - finally making it official!

  • I also had a reading fail.  I didn't pay attention to your wedding was June 1.  So when I saw 30 days out I thought your wedding was 30 days from May 20th.

    A lot of venues do things they way your venue is doing.  They do "soft" numbers  first.  That is because some people will say "we expect 200 people."   then only send out invites for 100 people. Hard to have 200 people if you only invite 100.    The soft number gives them a better idea of how big the event is going to be.   The hard numbers are closer (in your case 10 days out).  Those are for product, labor, etc.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • our venue is like this too.  We have a June 7th wedding, they want a tentative head count May 7th.  We are sending invites the first week of April (around the 6th) with a May 7th reply date. That way we can have a basic idea on the 7th but we still have room to adjust at the 2 week mark.  The final head count is due the Monday before the wedding.  
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    Anniversary
  • Okay glad to know we weren't alone! I just didn't want to inconvenience people by making them rsvp too early. I guess a month is okay. : thanks ladies!

    image

    June 1, 2013 - finally making it official!

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